Over Sensitive Kid??
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Better not to label. Unless she cries almost daily over whatever insignificant issues.
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Hi Barney,
Is your child a HSP? Highly sensitive person? Normally very intelligent also, because they are sensitive. A HSC (Child) will grow up a HSP. 20% of our population will fit into this 'category'. May be good to check it out. Here's a link about such people. http://www.highlysensitivepeople.com/
More relevant to a child: http://www.hsperson.com/pages/child.htm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04gnoReKgD4
One key point is that you must give a HSC less activity, and the punishment must be gentler. Go check it out. -
Hi Barney,
I wonder if you have tried to empathize with your child instead of writing off her worries/anxieties etc?
By telling her stuff like the teacher is busy etc, you might actually be invalidating her feelings. You might want to try to accept her feelings and ask her how or what does she think she would want to do about the situation? Talk about her role in it and also her teacher’s role… and maybe your role too. Brainstorm for ideas, no matter how silly. Try to work out a possible solution together with her. The idea is to get her to be proactive. While to many, the teacher not asking might be a small matter, it might be important to her. Get her to see that there might be a way out and she has a part in it too.
As to the Mas selemat issue, I remembered when my no 2 was in P2, she was afraid of being kidnapped (after watching a show on TV). I told her that it won’t happen, that we always locked the door, etc etc. Still, she’s scared. In the end, I worked it out with her with possible scenarios… like what she can do to prevent it from happening, what she would do if it happened etc etc. By working out solutions with her, she felt more in control and that she knew what the worst case scenarios were.
Hope this helps!
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[quote]Hi Barney,
Is your child a HSP? Highly sensitive person? Normally very intelligent also, because they are sensitive. A HSC (Child) will grow up a HSP. 20% of our population will fit into this 'category'. May be good to check it out. Here's a link about such people. http://www.highlysensitivepeople.com/
More relevant to a child: http://www.hsperson.com/pages/child.htm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04gnoReKgD4
One key point is that you must give a HSC less activity, and the punishment must be gentler. Go check it out.
EN Posted: 25 Feb 2010 16:28 Post subject:
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Better not to label. Unless she cries almost daily over whatever insignificant issues. [/quote]
Hi 2ppaamm, thanks for the link.
Hi Barney,
The very reason I say not to label your child is because I have an overly sensitive kid. It's a real pain to have a child that is HSP. For mine, sensitivities ranges from skin (I think he feels by the thread count :lol: ) & will reject certain materials. Sensitive on smell - when he was much younger, he sniff his food before he tasted it. He doesn't like going to the zoo because it smells. A big no no for wet market because within a certain range, definitely he will vomit. Sensitive on hearing - while sitting for night safari show to start, he already heard the snake hissing, sure enough, the snake was placed below us. Brand new piano, he told me off that it is no good because it gives a buzzing sound. Turns out to be a metal pointer placed on the notes holder. Sensitive to other needs -recently he was terrified of his second language teacher who does physical punishment to kids including him. I know my child very well so had a talk to the teacher. His main concern, did I help to save his other classmates too? Sensitive to animal plight? - I have gotten a free abalone after shopping in Tangs recently. This boy of mine was making a scene asking me to let go of the queue. He hates that another shell fish die an unnecessary death besides being killed to make pearls for jewellery. There are more to share. But I think I shared enough for parents who are unsure if their child is highly sensitive or not.
Sometime, I need to check myself from even saying jokes. Otherwise, he will end up
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Thanks to all mummies here for your advices.
Thanks 2ppaamm for the links, I hope to find time to read them soon, and 912mum, EN and lovekidsverymuch for sharing. I was hoping my kid will be normal like others but I guess I need to pay more attention to her feelings/behaviour/needs.
Another worry for me is that both my side and hubby’s side have immediate family members (1 each - and so coincident both were educators) who were diagnosed with schizophrenia, although both of them were able to lead normal lives after that, I’ve constantly remind myself not to put too much stress on her and hope with our bonding, she’ll share everything she has in her mind so that at least we can teach her to get out of those anxieties like what 912mum has shared. -
hi barney, is she a single child ?
I just thought that being a single child tends to behave like that. My child is also very sensitive and mature in thinking at her age, since young. Things you mentioned, happened to her too, even till now, at Sec school. Teachers’ and friends’ attention / comments, Mas Selamat, prank Tsunami emails, 2012 end of world … I have to give her lots of explanations and advices. -
EN:
For mine, sensitivities ranges from skin (I think he feels by the thread count :lol: ) & will reject certain materials.
EN,
OT. But I found this very interesting because I am like that. For some reasons, I cannot take any other materials besides cotton (as in t-shirt material only). If I were to wear materials (eg. those long sleeve biz shirt type of cotton). I would feel very very uncomfortable that I don't dare to move as it will touch my body..... I just cannot take it and it's till this extreme. I've been like that since young and I wondered how I survive those school uniforms. -
daisyt:
don't know if you guys have done some research on these. You are all giving symptoms of very gifted children: worrying, sensitivity - emotional and physical. Have you ever thought of what you can do to help the child?hi barney, is she a single child ?
I just thought that being a single child tends to behave like that. My child is also very sensitive and mature in thinking at her age, since young. Things you mentioned, happened to her too, even till now, at Sec school. Teachers' and friends' attention / comments, Mas Selamat, prank Tsunami emails, 2012 end of world .... I have to give her lots of explanations and advices. -
[quote]EN wrote:
For mine, sensitivities ranges from skin (I think he feels by the thread count ) & will reject certain materials.
EN,
OT. But I found this very interesting because I am like that. For some reasons, I cannot take any other materials besides cotton (as in t-shirt material only). If I were to wear materials (eg. those long sleeve biz shirt type of cotton). I would feel very very uncomfortable that I don't dare to move as it will touch my body..... I just cannot take it and it's till this extreme. I've been like that since young and I wondered how I survive those school uniforms.[/quote]OT liao. Big question. Did your parents at one time feels like squeezing you when you rejected the clothing that they bought because of material issue? My son rejected clothing as young as 1 year old. My IL super happy receiving hands me down clothing that never been worn. Know what, every time sensititivity issue crops up, I'll discuss wth dh, is that your trait or mine. If the trait is mine, I go & handle the issue and if the trait comes from him, dh has to step in.
But the school issue is extremely touchy, so we both came down to talk to the teacher.
Any of your kids, MMM share this trait? -
2ppaamm:
hhmmm... Really mei? But dd is just average in study, a very normal child. In what ways can we help? 2ppaamm, pls share with us yr tips.
don't know if you guys have done some research on these. You are all giving symptoms of very gifted children: worrying, sensitivity - emotional and physical. Have you ever thought of what you can do to help the child?daisyt:
hi barney, is she a single child ?
I just thought that being a single child tends to behave like that. My child is also very sensitive and mature in thinking at her age, since young. Things you mentioned, happened to her too, even till now, at Sec school. Teachers' and friends' attention / comments, Mas Selamat, prank Tsunami emails, 2012 end of world .... I have to give her lots of explanations and advices.
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