Children of average ability
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Normal cc is not meant for your children as your standards and expectations are on the high side. For you, you have to choose the premium ones and then you may have the issue of whether you want to pay so high for cc fees. Just like choosing 6-star hotel vs 3 star hotel. Personally I will not choose cc because it also cannot meet my expectation but I understand their constraints and they need to be profitable to survive.
Parents are very lavish with toys these days and think that toys will do the magic stimulation BUT it is actually affluence talking. Honestly, the lack of toys is actually the way to stimulate higher creativity. Poor children, if born with the intelligence, would certainly be forced to use their intelligence much earlier than the affluent ones. These children are also not robots, if they are keen for more blocks, they will move into another child's territory to get more, you think they will stop at their allocation? And even for those who are given many blocks, will they not go and still take someone else's block? Managing kids is a complex issue, cannot oversimplify that throwing them the expensive toys and that's it.
As for ill treatment, if you do not allow a child to learn either to eat well or stand up for herself/himself when so-called abuse, you will be leaving the child in a sorry state when you are not there to protect her/him. Eating is basic and if it requires alot of cajoling and sweet words, something is wrong...and definitely cannot be expected in a cc. Like myself, I know my child is a fussy eater and my expectation of the kindy is just to ensure my child learns how to eat together with other children, not expecting them to cajole my kid to eat all kinds of food if I am the one who so-called \"spoilt\" my kid. If the kindy can help correct it, it is a bonus to me.
Also, the expectation of what the cc needs to do is unreal like \"leaving children to play on their own is a no-no?\" Don't we do that at home too otherwise you will be choked or else why buy so expensive toys? so that you can play with the child all the time?
Sometimes this 'value for money' concept is taken overboard, sounds like the 50cts bigger than the wheelcart wheels. CC staff are also humans, need a breather sometimes.
Sorry I am not picking on anyone in particular and I understand this is a discussion of 'like-minded' people but do be mindful that cc is created for mass market. And if you don't belong to mass market, better to have private dialogues otherwise can sound snobbish. Just for your thoughts.
I would rather cover topics like safety, hygiene/cleaniness, basic food nutrition(ie minimum process food), basic resting conditions for a discussion on cc. -
buds:
Mummies or Daddies may not make the best teachers... I beg to differ. Parents usually have higher expectations and are often not able to manage them realistically. So teaching time can become a 'battle' time. One can witness tempers flaring :x when patience runs dry :stupid: and words that hurt the esteem may be heard.
Lucky.. Lucky..
Well, your kiddies and mine are lucky to
get US! Their mommies as teachers!!
It is through such times that relationships between parents and children are strained unintentionally. I, for one, was guilty of such behaviours . I am not a perfect mummy nor teacher...
Upon reflection, I have decided to play a less minor role in the teaching process but major on the \"mother' role... want my kids to see me more as their mother than teacher.... So I only come in to help only when they ask for it..
My husband has no such problem with the children... they see him as a DAD who drives and picks them up from school, tells them stories (not teaching them) , plays games with them and is present at their sports day, concerts and other school events. He is just their father.
In fact, I have a friend who does just that and she is a homemaker. She has never taught her children in any way....just leave it to the teachers. Of course, she sees to the children's physical and emotional needs and provides all the encouragement and support needed. And the result ... is her children are all independent learners who have done well in their studies too.
Some of the top PSLE students in my son's former school have parents who don't speak Good English, know nuts about Heuristics or process skills in Science...
Take heart.... for those who may not have the gift of teaching... We can affirm our children in little ways which can go a long way in determining their future ...
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Envious with all of you who are able to stay at home to look after the kids, or have parents or parents-in-law to look after your kids.
I am not so lucky. MIL is too old and when DS1 was born, already declared she won’t help us. Mum passed away shortly after DS1 was born.
So, I only have myself to depend on. And I need to work. I don’t have many choices.
I put my 3 children through child care. But I chose one that I am happy with - Creative O Preschooler’s Bay. They adopt the project approach, and I must say my 3 children benefited lots from their pre-school experience. I have never regretted the decision to put my kids in childcare.
BTW, I used to have a maid. But I still send the kids to CC.
Just sharing my thoughts. -
Emelyn,
I understand that there are parents like you who have no choice but to put your kids in CC. You have done a good job finding a good CC for your kids !
I believe that good CCs do exist, it just takes luck and effort to find.
[quote]Mummies or Daddies may not make the best teachers... I beg to differ. Parents usually have higher expectations and are often not able to manage them realistically. So teaching time can become a 'battle' time. One can witness tempers flaring Mad when patience runs dry Bang Head and words that hurt the esteem may be heard.[/quote]I have heard a mommy trying to teach her son to read the Ladybird keyword series at the Popular bookshop. I heard her saying \"This word has repeated so many times, and you still don't know? What is wrong with you ?\"
I was shocked. Honestly I do not understand why a mommy can use such a tone on her own child. But you are right that such parents do exist.
In my case, my logic is that if I myself don't have the patience to teach my own child, then I don't expect other teachers to be able to do so. Even if I sent my boy to classes, he will also not learn anything. It is best to save the money. -
buds:
buds,
3. If the group were given more blocks to dabble with, teachers cud
observe many a sightings with these cuties. One may be arranging all
same coloured blocks in a row-like-train.. Another may be counting
quite far already, than we thought he could! One other mate cud be
arranging domino-like patterns with flat blocks.. Or a few may be
engaged in stair-like structures ( exploring dimensions! ) And many
many other observations, other than construction-based creativities.
There was a pile of blocks in the middle of the table. I found it a little disturbing that none of the kids took the initiative to take more blocks from that pile. Were they made to play with the same things everyday ? Were they bored ? They were just holding the blocks in their hands, waiting for time to pass. Another possibility could be that the teacher restricted each child from taking too many blocks, because they are supposed to \"share\".
The kids were not even moving away from the chair. These kids were below 3 years old. At that age, my kids could not sit still for more than 1 minute. The teacher must have done a good job \"training\" them to sit still. But that is not something that I want my kids to be trained at.ks2me:
I have also visited Pat schoolhouse at Arena. I was not impressed. If I pay that kind of money, then they better meet my very high expectations. The children still have to sleep on canvas beds. Can't they afford decent mattresses ? I am a very fussy mommy !Normal cc is not meant for your children as your standards and expectations are on the high side. For you, you have to choose the premium ones and then you may have the issue of whether you want to pay so high for cc fees. Just like choosing 6-star hotel vs 3 star hotel.
ks2me:
Also, the expectation of what the cc needs to do is unreal like \"leaving children to play on their own is a no-no?\" Don't we do that at home too otherwise you will be choked or else why buy so expensive toys? so that you can play with the child all the time? Wink Sometimes this 'value for money' concept is taken overboard, sounds like the 50cts bigger than the wheelcart wheels. CC staff are also humans, need a breather sometimes.
Some of our Lego sets have lasted for more than 4 years, and they are still like brand new. This is why I prefer such toys, although they are expensive, their quality is superb. Even after being thrown around, stepped on, etc. Most importantly, these toys help to develop creativity and fine motor skills. Lego and Playmobil have been around for more than 30 years, so there must be many other people who think that they are good. However, as I wrote in my earlier post, even without expensive toys, playing with other things that can be found at home can be just as fun.
When our kids were less than 3 years old, my mother or my maid took turns to play with them, every minute that they were awake. Children below the age of 3 need to be taught how to play. In the past, younger children follow older children around and learn to play from them. However, in every CC nowadays, children are grouped by age, what can they learn from each other ?
After 3 years old, both my kids learn to play on their own. We are all so relieved !ks2me:
As for ill treatment, if you do not allow a child to learn either to eat well or stand up for herself/himself when so-called abuse, you will be leaving the child in a sorry state when you are not there to protect her/him. Eating is basic and if it requires alot of cajoling and sweet words, something is wrong...and definitely cannot be expected in a cc.
My point is that some children just cannot learn to eat well on their own. Not every child will eat when he/she is hungry. Some children simply do not like to eat. And I think that simply letting the child go hungry for the whole day is very cruel. These children are not suitable to be in CCs. -
tamarind:
In most local primary schools, it is not uncommon to find Singlish speaking teachers too. Good English-Speaking teachers are lacking these days.If I pay $1000 or more a month, I will certainly not tolerate Singlish speaking teachers !
My girl's teacher's English is grammatically OK, it is just that she speaks like any other Singaporean. I listen to BBC so I am hoping that my kids speak like those BBC news presenters
Both my kids' teachers are not the the screaming type otherwise I would have moved them elsewhere.
And you'll not only find screaming teachers who are under lots of stress handling a class of 30 to 40 children but more often than not, screaming discipline masters in the hall before assembly and sometimes, screaming principals... :x
For those parents who cannot tolerate such scenes and have the skills and patience to teach their children better, I think home-schooling is the best...
Actually a friend of mine is home-schooling her three sons... guess who's screaming...? :lol: -
i think this thread has spiraled into childcare and homeschooling vs preschool teaching discussion.
-
Heyya csc,
Thanks for pointing it out!
Yes, yes.. i agree.
I am blessed that the gift of teaching comes natural for me
as i have been in the industry for awhile. It is very helpful
for me to teach my own - which is not neccesarily easier!
But it does save money! Hehee.. Having to stay home this
knowledge came in handy, thank god!
As i understand how some parents may not be versed in trying
to teach their children, i have come up with a way to help them.
During my full time working days, i ALWAYS include post lesson
briefing for all my students' parents/guardians. I bring them into
the class with the materials still laid out and first show how i
conducted my lesson. Meaning the parents get to see how the
actual lesson was conducted for the day and parents get to
see whether their children understood lesson learnt for the day
in front of them and watch their children's responses.
After which, i ask for the children's assistance if they cud help
put back some of the materials we used and its during this few
minutes i spend time with the parents. I ask parents if they need
me to answer any doubts they have about the lesson, about how
the child is progressing or if they wish to know more on how to
do home re-inforcements. If time permits, i will show them step
by step how to conduct that similar lesson at home. For such pre-
active parents, i love to share external materials for them to do
with their children at home. Usually, by the next lesson i wud have
prepared a fun package for them to bring home! This wud assist
the working parents to go straight into the teaching/reinforcing
without having to source and make the materials themselves.
So far, through this effort, parents have better understanding of
what is covered and how to reinforce as for most enrichment
lessons are like hourly and on weekly basis. Since i observe an
open policy for my lessons, i never really had problems with the
parents or the children. It helps the children to master the lesson
learnt better with parents involvement which is good and parents
get to learn the simple skills they can use to teach siblings. I
suppose its a win-win situation for me.
Parents happy, teacher happy!
PS - I apologise if my indulgences via my posts have neglected
parents who may not be able to teach their own. Very insensititve
of me... Am guilty of getting caught up in the housewives rambling,
hehee.. Forgive the oversight, k? :oops: -
Heyya jedamum,
Ya hor! You're right lah..
Make that one big spiral!
Hehee..
K, lets not stray from the topic header..
Back to talk on working with our children
and children of average ability.
Paiseh.. Paiseh..
:oops:
PS : Think must start new thread on ramblings of the average kiasumum!
:lol: :lol: :lol: Wuahahahahaaa! Hey, appreciate the positive observation, jedamum. Tks! -
Its always important to see the big picture in things we do and say.
The times that we fail to do so may result in unwanted or unnecessary
misunderstandings or petty conflicts. But, i personally find that
to resolve the situation and have the big picture cleared up will ease
the feeling in the gut. I would not mind being subjected to humility if
it indeed was a flaw on my part, un-intentionally..
Many things to clear up today, so that we can all finally end this
chapter and start afresh from where we left off. Lets begin...
For users who find its not of their common interest reading any
post, there's always a choice not to read. This is a forum... a
platform for public discussion. Users have rights to agree and disagree
and to remain anonymous. It is also an unspoken rule to remain
cordial with everyone we encounter here and hostile language or
equivalent best be avoided.
>Posts/Comments on childcare
>These are mainly from an educator's point of view first cause
i have been in this mass market provided for parents all over.
And i have worked with the cheapo-profit-making types and also
slightly upmarket ones, however my stand is still that if one can
afford to care for their children it is still best. Its like taking a maid.
Those who have seen the extremes, they swear they'll never ever
hire one again whatever the cost. Likewise for myself, i have seen
extremes. Both sides of the extremes to be fair. But more of the
ugly sides i'm afraid. Just like maids.. Visit the All About Maids Forum
if you don't believe me. Majority have negative feedback on maids.
But not neccesarily avoiding the fact, there are great ones... if we're
lucky. I've been lucky a couple of times when working on a short
overseas stint some years back.
Now that i am also a parent, there will also be personal comments on
the services of a childcare as well, environment, curriculum and also
the teachers. Personal opinions are where others are welcome to differ.
Human beings are all different, unique to their own characters and
personalities as well as the ways we have been raised. No two person's
opinions may be exactly alike unless cloned. In case of like-minded
comments, most times its totally coincidental. Or at times for jest sake.
Truthfully, there may not be a childcare that meets up to anyone's
expectations because the child is ours and what we do for our children
may not measure up to someone else's type of care. So for me, tho
i do have a choice to go premium if i really wanted to, it isn't a big of
a deal, esp if one works full time... but as a personal choice, i chose
not to. Why? Cos i kiasu. I want everything to be provided under one
roof which most are not able to give even at a premium price plus i'm
very particular about staff credibility and capability. So why go bother
other people? Hence, i do myself. Fair, i suppose. And also... FOC.
>Inborn Intelligence
>I don't suppose its appropriate to say that a child is born stupid.
I have heard of borne-geniuses... a fair number of em' famous people. But poor children born with intelligence wud still require stimulation from
the caregiver. Unless without any stimulation or any teachings the
newborn can already walk and talk on their own.
>Lavish Toys
>These i frankly do not own many. However, my agreement with a fellow
user, tamarind, is based purely on agreement with the excellent quality
of these toys and their extreme durability in the long run. I also do not
expect a childcare to have \"expensive toys\" as a major criteria of whether
the childcare is good or not. As long as its safe for children to use, its
good enough. I for one fully understand that term \"profitability\" in centres
cause i've managed a few. Profitability without the expense of lousy heck
care attitude staff and without the expense of an un-prepared environment
ie. not enough pencils, not enough bread, not enough books, etc for the
total number of enrolment in a centre. Profit yes, but do not shortchange
customers. Who are they? The customers are really the children. If they're happy, the parents will be happy. The parents will be more than
happy to pay any price, premium or non-premium.
>Ill-treatment / Abuse
>As an educator, i do not tolerate abuse... of ANY kind. As a parent,
of course all the more, NO! No parent will allow their children to be
subjected to any form of abuse or ill-treatment. Those who have kids
who are verbal, their kids can go home and complain. They will vomit
out the exact detail of what they have done in the centre. Their parents
WILL know. Babies however, do not have the ability to express coherently
compared to a bigger child, the goings-on of his day at a centre... unless
maybe those who are able to speak clearly at an earlier age.
>The verbal abuse mentioned in previous post was not just towards my
child. I first noted verbal abuse on another child whom i comforted in the
centre's toilet area. The child was big, but wasn't a complainer. Just went
into the toilet to have a good cry and came out with face all washed up
nice and clean and ready for another round. This teacher i encountered
was downright nasty. You be the judge.. She uses words like you stupid
girl, or you're such a rascal, eh.. you gangster is it, bloody idiot, and
lots more others which are inappropriate to be printed here. No matter
how bo-chap or understanding a parent may be, this is totally
unacceptable. It may not have happened to my child but my heart went
out to the children who did suffer under the teacher from the pits of hell.
I also felt so bad for the parents who didn't know... They're working so
hard to pay for the premium fees and yet... sigh...
>The verbal abuse automatically subjects the children to emotional
despair, unspoken of... of course. The corporal are like asking another
student to use a ruler and help teacher punish another student like a
tap on the hand. HOW CAN? I disliked every second of my working
hours there, it made me very unhappy. Each time i send out a child to
their parents upon dismissal i felt really bad for them. The feeling so
hard to describe tugging at my heart strings.
>If a form of abuse is done by children, we can teach the child (slowly)
the survival skills but a form of abuse from a person of authority, how?
This is not good for the emotional well-being of any child.
>Cajoling???
>Cajoling directly means, to persuade or soothe by flattery or deceit.
Now, that is an exaggerated expression misconstrued for the discussion
posted. If teachers are human beings, then of course children are too!
There is no need for cajoling at all. Just do not be RUDE or HARSH,
(we're educators for god's sake!) or use harsh and sarcastic verbal
interpretations to get a child to eat.
Furthermore, the first few days a new child esp at 18mths are left in total
care of a childcare, they are helplessly crying... pining and yearning for their parents/caregivers. We, the childcare minders are the ones who
should make them feel as much as possible welcome, cared for and in
safe hands. We want them to know we are here for them, during the
times their parents can't. Needless to say that parents at work too, are
constantly thinking of their babies and how they're coping in the centre..
We are all humans. All of us have feelings.
I EXPECT teachers to be kind and warm to young children so they
can have less of the separation anxiety and adapt quickly to this new
environment which is almost like a 2nd home ( especially for full day
children ).
>Un-observed play time..
>I got the impression from tamarind when she said the teacher left the
kids to play on their own as in really leaving them alone. Meaning the
teacher is out of sight. This IS A NO-NO!! A mishap is a blink away!
So, yes no way can a credible educator do that esp for that young an
age group! Thats my firm EXPECTATION!
>Tho the centres i work with are geared mainstream, we take in the
special children as well as those with illnesses that are manageable for
our teachers to observe care. Leaving the table with children who are
playing to go chat with other teachers or gossip about the parents or
anything other than be in the class to be with the children, is not
acceptable. If parents are okay with such free unobserved play, the
home is FREE OF CHARGE, no need to send childcare for free play.
Thankfully, a couple of centres i have worked with totally do not have
block play to avoid spoil-market teachers chucking the pile of blocks
so they can skive. It was for a good cause. These centres provide
manipulatives and other materials suitable for observed play. I as a
teacher am responsible for ALL the children under my care. If a child
has developed fits when i'm not there, i am RESPONSIBLE. A few autistic
children in my care have varied autism range. I must monitor that the
no one gets hurt from an occasional tantrum or temper flare. A poke in
the eye, a fall over the chair or just the seemingly normal bump-in
can cause unwanted mishaps in a class no matter how small. Staff have
their breathers lunch-time! After lunch, back to work. Back to the respon-
sibilities of a teacher. Period.
>I personally have not left my children to play on their own in their
early years. They are always with me for any kind of play. Personal
choice! And I don't feel choked at all. I enjoy the playtime together.
The only time i carry out the household neccesities are when they sleep!
Through the observed play children have in their early years, they play
well when they're older and until such time they can be trusted to play
without adult supervision. In a centre that one has paid for, all eyes
MUST be on the children. And here, they have stringent requirements for
a proportionate ratio of teachers:class size. This is a good measure.
>Mass Market
>Childcare is definitely mass market. More so now, when many families
cannot afford to sustain a comfortable lifestyle with a single income from a sole breadwinner - be it the mother or father.
I served the mass market for a looong time, i know the insides and outs
of it. The good, the bad and the ugly and also the fair and lovely too! To name a few examples from the many exemplary teachers i had the honour to work with. One former colleague who made sure she called
parents personally during the first week every single day of a new child's
entry even when this is not required or compulsory with the
communication book now widely used in centres. She used her lunch time
to catch up quickly with parents so the parents can work without any worry in their minds. Another made sure the children are cleaned up from
eye wax, fresh diaper was put on, cleaned up children's face and hair all
combed, prior to collection from parents. She even prepared warm milk
to pass to the children while waiting...
Fellow supervisors and senior teachers chipping in to help clean the toilets
when the cleaner couldn't manage (with coats and all) ... and colleagues
who help out with dismissal time even when they could jolly well go
home, cos another teacher was down attending to a child who isn't feeling
well and had vomitted all over the centre...
The are always 2 sides to a coin. 2 sides to a story.
>Topic Stray
>I humbly agree that this thread may have strayed unintentionally..
Now with this off my chest, ( at least for me.. ) i would gladly resume
to how the posts in this thread should read. >Working with children &
working with children of average ability. Promise! Hehee..
For the parents who have given me the nudge to what seemed like my
ramblings and rantings of a typical housewife, thank you for your sincere
& positive observation... i truly appreciate it. I'm human too and i do
have \"off\" days .. pls... pls... accept my apologies for it wasn't intended
to be so. As for snobbish? Thats far from what i am, in real life or in this forum.
Hope we can carry on from here afresh..
Sincerely... from the bottom of my heart,
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