How much is enough for retirement in Singapore?

[hercules]

starlight1968sg:

OT: A good reminder on 养育之恩大如天 and this includes treating not only our parents but our inlaws too.

Maybe can constantly hash this in mind when one holds certain grievances against parents:

父母再也没有欠我们什么，现在只有我们欠他们的，and we shall pay back as and when we can.

[cool_hi]

Hercules, I have always enjoyed reading your post quietly…

& i knew my post will sure stir some reaction from some and from u(as expected)…
thanks for your time …
But while u do not know/bother to find out what other terrible things one had done…
i think it is not fair to point fingers…so fast…
I have NEVER EVER say parents cannot play favouritism…
BUT when it’s too extreme, one just have to face the consequences…
it is a situation of no right nor wrong…

(NB: last post on this)

[hercules]

cool_hi:

it is a situation of no right nor wrong...

(NB: last post on this)

My sharing is not really targeting on you but in general such as for starlight too.

As long as after making a decision, any decision, one can feel more peaceful, then that decision is likely to be correct; otherwise, most of the time is wrong and have to experience 'turmoil'.

Sometimes it is like you said 'it is a situation of no right nor wrong', meaning no matter how one decides also cannot feel peaceful, then just listen to the spouse/child for the final say since either way also no right nor wrong.

Maintaining peace in the heart is what one should try to achieve in all situations, and I hope you can find that too (this 'peacefulness’ usually can come as one ages though not always).

[starlight1968sg]

Ladies

We are all different and hence we have differences in views/experiences. There is no right or wrong. We have to be good to our parents and in laws. Some parents esp the older generation practiced favouritism and there is no doubt on favouring boys over girls. My mum is a living example as her parents would rather send her brothers to school while the girls remained at home to sew to earn a living.
If I were to have more than one child, I may love one more than another secretly in my heart. After all, our fingers from the same hand are of different lengths.

Back to retirement, in order not to burden our parents and our children, we have to take care of our finances

[pirate]

hercules:

Now my two kids are 'fighting' to stay with me after they marry.

Then their in-laws how? :scratchhead: Maybe their spouses can also 'fight' to stay with their parents. :siam:

[hercules]

pirate:

hercules:

Now my two kids are 'fighting' to stay with me after they marry.

Then their in-laws how? :scratchhead: Maybe their spouses can also 'fight' to stay with their parents. :siam:

Haha, I will be more than pleased if my their future spouses will fight to stay with their parents coz that will be a large development growth for my kids and themselves.

I told them to stay on their own first if possible to learn about household mgmt (my idea of to start with a 3-room flat). My interest is still to take care of all these little grand nieces and nephews in my house (and in future my own grand kids if they need care). Then when parents get older and need medical help years later, to reassess the situations to decide accordingly.

[lee_yl]

pirate:

hercules:

Now my two kids are 'fighting' to stay with me after they marry.

Then their in-laws how? :scratchhead: Maybe their spouses can also 'fight' to stay with their parents. :siam:

Hercules, if I may ask, have you been staying together with your MIL? So far, I have never heard you mention about your MIL. Did your late mum stay with her DIL?

If you are not comfortable, it’s ok not to reply, I m just curious

[Nebbermind]

pirate:

hercules:

Now my two kids are 'fighting' to stay with me after they marry.

Then their in-laws how? :scratchhead: Maybe their spouses can also 'fight' to stay with their parents. :siam:

A friend also wanna to live with her parents....so she can rent out her flat n become a triple income family

[janet88]

cool_hi:

But when need help of any form, approach daughters 1st... coz son no time !!

my mum and her sisters are the ones who attend to grandmother in terms of her health, or should i say everything. my grandmother leaves all her valuable jewellery bought over the years to her sons but none of them have time for her.

[janet88]

starlight1968sg:

If I were to have more than one child, I may love one more than another secretly in my heart. After all, our fingers from the same hand are of different lengths.


Back to retirement, in order not to burden our parents and our children, we have to take care of our finances

my daughter is sensitive, caring and is more of the 体贴 kind...she will remember little things like 'grandma cannot walk too much as her knee will be painful'. son being a boy will not think like her...but wants to stay with me because he is afraid his future wife will not take care of him :slapshead:
sorry :offtopic: