Me Time!
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ammonite:
To be honest, now that I have gone through motherhood, I would encourage my kids to start a family at a younger age. Start earlier (with family support) and you can enjoy the fruits of your labour sooner.
Same here, but it may be hard for them to be so \"out of synch\" with their friends. Also, I find that young adults are maturing later, so they are often not mentally prepared for the responsibilities of being a parent (or even being a spouse!) in their mid-20s. Especially those who were very focused on academics and achievements into their 20s - they seem to need some time to focus on other things after that. Those who started earlier may have worked it out of their system sooner? -
Tks slmkhoo and ammonite
Yes, I am still looking for something which I can do or enjoy
At times I do wish dd remains single and can be with me -
starlight1968sg:
:scared: But if that happens, you will start worrying for her when you are in your seventies and she is in her forties/fifties. Especially since she is an only child.Tks slmkhoo and ammonite
Yes, I am still looking for something which I can do or enjoy
At times I do wish dd remains single and can be with me -
slmkhoo:
Very hard to say. My friends have married at vastly different ages, so have my younger relatives. Some people cannot wait to get married and have kids, others never have the desire. Some have the best of plans but things don’t go their way. My kids know that I am ok if they don’t want to have kids, I am also ok if they have their kids in early twenties. I will never tell them that they should not have kids until they are established in their careers or finish their masters etc. Neither will I tell them that they must have kids otherwise they will be lonely. Every choice involves a sacrifice somewhere. My personal take is simply that it is easier and more enjoyable to be a younger parent than an older parent.ammonite:
To be honest, now that I have gone through motherhood, I would encourage my kids to start a family at a younger age. Start earlier (with family support) and you can enjoy the fruits of your labour sooner.
Same here, but it may be hard for them to be so \"out of synch\" with their friends. Also, I find that young adults are maturing later, so they are often not mentally prepared for the responsibilities of being a parent (or even being a spouse!) in their mid-20s. Especially those who were very focused on academics and achievements into their 20s - they seem to need some time to focus on other things after that. Those who started earlier may have worked it out of their system sooner?
On second thoughts, it is “harder” to have kids young these days because the opportunity cost is so much more given the greater range of choices available. -
starlight1968sg:
ST,Tks slmkhoo and ammonite
Yes, I am still looking for something which I can do or enjoy
At times I do wish dd remains single and can be with me
You will gain a \"son\" when your dd marries
Quite many years back, FIL, by slip of tongue, told everyone that a business friend who has a daughter had wanted to matchmake her daughter and hubby.
The daughter is still unmarried and FIL had said that it is the protective mother who caused her only daughter to remain single. -
Jennifer
How to let go my flesh who is forever my baby?
I know I may be doing more harm than good to dd. -
It is not an either-or choice. You may even have more in common after she becomes a wife and mother.
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It is draining when both our parents and our children depend on us emotionally, physically and financially. And not forgetting planning for ourselves to be financially independent as we get older…hard to see the end of it at times…
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starlight1968sg:
The \"letting go\" is part of growing up, and we should be happy when we see that happening. Just as we sent them to school, to OBS, to work etc. Not letting them go may stunt them, just as if we never let them stop drinking from a milk bottle, or not letting take public transport. If we have a strong relationship, they never completely go away, and you will gain a son, and 2 young friends. We have to steel ourselves to do what is best for our kids, even if it is some cost to ourselves.Jennifer
How to let go my flesh who is forever my baby?
I know I may be doing more harm than good to dd. -
sean wife:
It is draining when both our parents and our children depend on us emotionally, physically and financially. And not forgetting planning for ourselves to be financially independent as we get older...hard to see the end of it at times..
My parents and inlaws don’t have much cpf from their working days. Our children should be in a better position as we are more likely to accumulate more cpf.
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