Me Time!
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Not parents. Can never talk to parents on hp Mgt. Helping students.
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Hi Estéema,
Are you referring to your boy’s Secondary school which is a boy’s school? I didn’t give much thought about the porn matter until I saw your post. How did the school finds out and how did you get involved in counselling the students ? It’s good to get to know more about this as we are thinking to DSA to your boy’s school. -
Joyymum:
Hi Estéema,
Are you referring to your boy’s Secondary school which is a boy’s school? I didn’t give much thought about the porn matter until I saw your post. How did the school finds out and how did you get involved in counselling the students ? It’s good to get to know more about this as we are thinking to DSA to your boy’s school.
The thing started when a parent shared recent news clip on HCI restricting students fr use of hp 7am to 2pm. Then some parents shared issues going on at RI & before we knew it someone alerted me abt a boy who started his habit of viewing porn in P6 & was counseled but apparently he's sharing ard.
Sporadically, u'll hear this as in P4, I heard a child ask parents if can drop bus ride home coz the older kids were always sharing & giggling back of sch bus. As parents, we just work together not to shame our kids but to find ways to educate use & safety (think these topics taught in Pri schools but still u'll get one or two such cases.)
We hv a very involved doc dad in our PSG. We're coordinating for this for our kids. Thankful we cld owise, s'times teachers can't monitor effectively (not bcoz of competency issues) but kids these days are very creative avoid detection - silent mode, hide under desks & books, eyes on teacher looking fully attentive. S'times kids even read WhatsApp on desktop, pretending doing hmwk! -
Reading the HCI mobile phone makes me glad that I did not give in to ah boy’s request for a data plan phone subscription.
When I take the morning bus to go to n return from the market, I see many Bt Timah schools students playing games on the mobile phone. -
Jennifer:
HCI is bold to implement such. I wonder why pri sch kids need a smartphone.Reading the HCI mobile phone makes me glad that I did not give in to ah boy's request for a data plan phone subscription.
When I take the morning bus to go to n return from the market, I see many Bt Timah schools students playing games on the mobile phone. -
starlight1968sg:
It's more that kids do need a phone for contacting parents (school timings and CCAs etc can be quite erratic, for safety as they move around etc, and public phones are hard to find), and nowadays, they are all smartphones. But like Jennifer, I didn't get a data plan for my kids.
HCI is bold to implement such. I wonder why pri sch kids need a smartphone.Jennifer:
Reading the HCI mobile phone makes me glad that I did not give in to ah boy's request for a data plan phone subscription.
When I take the morning bus to go to n return from the market, I see many Bt Timah schools students playing games on the mobile phone.
Most pr schools don't allow the phones to be used during the schoolday, I think. It's harder to implement that for sec school as it is useful for kids to be able to go online to check things sometimes. Parents can refuse to let kids have data plans, and inculcate habits at home such as not always using the phone every spare moment. -
During the olden days, there were no hp and we were ok.
The hp offers convenience but with a price. -
starlight1968sg:
I had my mobile phone when I was 21.During the olden days, there were no hp and we were ok.
The hp offers convenience but with a price.
my daughter had a mobile phone when she was 9...because her school was at a temporary holding place and it was chaotic after school.
so I gave her an old one to be able to reach her. when 2G was terminated, I had to upgrade her to a smart phone on the condition that she cannot play or touch her mobile phone until homework is completed. -
Students need to be taught how to handle devices given to their hands. The maturity of kids to handle is ano issue.
We rather pay abit more for separate SIM card than to tag plans that seemed like slot of savings, but if my kids gonna enjoy unlimited use & loose self-control, then no. I'll wait ano few years to get them data plan.
Kids are smarter & more creative than our generation. I wld prefer if schools send instructions & work thro emails. Kids hv been using all excuses to check with seniors, teachers, classmates abt hmwk, proj, meetings, etc. I rmbr DS was getting like >800 WhatsApp msgs in just one afternn beginning of sec sch life, but after nagging there were no sounds. Why? He went underground - put on silent/vibration mode. The sch implements no hp during lesson time but sure, boys can put hp under desk, covered with a book to text & game. We found that with the hp, kids can practically spend whole of break time on devices rather than eat their meals (some parents too pics during recess as prove to sch).
It's not just the hp. Kids uses desktop for WhatsApping too! Gaming on desktop. One FTWM had to drive home to collect & lock up all her 5 kids hp when hubby on bz trips. She tracked them using Qustido but kids learned fast enuf to disappear fr tracking.
Here are issues & dangers as parents we'll be concerned :-
1. Habits of indulgence
2. Self-control
3. Leading all to addiction
4. Gaming
5. Access to pornography
6. Easy access for kids to start BGR too early via FB, Instagram, .... (many kids searched out cute guys/gals thro social media & friend others. One chap got stalked & somehow got hold of his number & when ignored, she posted his hp no. & was harassed by many more strangers thus affecting his emotions & exams).
7. Use of WhatsApp, & Social Media shows how lack of emotional resilience this generation of kids are and I'm concern how they'll lack the ability to socialize face-to-face & talk heart-to-heart . Imagine my kids go partor & need the hp & just msg whatever they want to say via hp, like they've lost their voicebox! Physically there for each other but emotionally & spiritually absent! :siao:
It's a society with growing need for instant gratification. Even now, I'm conscious that I shld do less KSP msg & call my niece to cheer her on towards PSLE. But those in Australia, M'sia UK & US with time zone differences?
It's not easy. I'll just hv to be mindful when kids are ard to touch my hp less. :gloomy: For the sake of good modeling.
I wonder how many schools will do what HCI did. Firstly, such action limits Parents ability to contact students or vice-versa when there is need for after-sch arrgmts. So, if a student is found using during those hours, what's the recourse? Punishment? DS sch make the guys write Reflections. (They created some templates to pass ard
) I'm sure parents do not want punishment that hurt or shame their kids. So, how effective can policing be in school?
Secondly, whose responsibility is it to control kids use of devices? The sch or the parent?
Finally, we still hv to wait out the time for maturity & spend effort to teach, to counsel & to correct. As parents, we'll shudder to see our kids addicted, spend less time in studies, fail tests/exams ... we'll still be the ones reminding them to stop after hours of head dipping, & we'll be the ones comforting them when they fail, then providing the support to redirect their path (or for some push them for more tuitioning).
I choose to volunteer my time to teach the kids to communicate succinctly & watch their affair with their gadgets. It's abt self-control & it's not just abt hp/gadgets. It'll be deeper than that when the youth turns into adulthood. The world is full of temptations - wine, women, casinos, branded clothes/bags (Imelda stuck on my mind), .... the list goes on. A man without self-control is doom to ruins! A woman without self-control will ruin the man! :rotflmao:
It's a long process but kids hv to grow, to learn, to find their footing & develop good self-management skills. We can't hurry the struggling butterfly on its way to fly out of cocoon but we can feed the caterpillar loads!
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janet88:
We can't compare purely by age - mobile phones didn't exist when I was in school! I got my first hp (a brick) when I was 35!
I had my mobile phone when I was 21.starlight1968sg:
During the olden days, there were no hp and we were ok.
The hp offers convenience but with a price.
my daughter had a mobile phone when she was 9...because her school was at a temporary holding place and it was chaotic after school.
so I gave her an old one to be able to reach her. when 2G was terminated, I had to upgrade her to a smart phone on the condition that she cannot play or touch her mobile phone until homework is completed.
But, like janet, parents need to set clear rules and enforce them when kids get phones (or any other privileges, for that matter).
What I find strange is that many parents I've spoken to assume that once a child has a phone, he has to be given access to a data plan, and that parents have little (or no) control over the phone's use. It doesn't have to be that way.
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