How much is enough for retirement in Singapore?
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Cloud Cloud\" post_id=\"1937309\" time=\"1569476021\" user_id=\"160688:[quote=\"Cloud Cloud\" post_id=1937309 time=1569476021 user_id=160688]
20 years age gap! Soon, she may need to change his diaper.[/quote] oh dear :rotflmao:lee_yl\" post_id=\"1937302\" time=\"1569475208\" user_id=\"17023:
DH’s friend is currently going through a divorce. The guy really went for the 日久生情、并肩作战 business partner (mistress).I think the long hours and stress at work bring people together. 日久生情 celebrating wins together, experiencing the adrenlin rush of success, consoling each other in bad moments, growing together professionally, etc.
Not all spouses are supportive. Not every home environment is conducive to someone who has a bad day.
Some people will rather not go home if it means a second shift of doing housework or supervising kids. It's more enjoyable socialising outside. 我逗你开心 你逗我开心
One thing I don’t quite understand;
the wife is willing to forgive the man but the man still wants to call it quits ?!?! And the stupid thing is, what started off as a fling should stay a fling. After 偷吃, just wipe your mouth and go home lah. As both sides are married with children, I cannot understand how can the mistress give up her young kindergarten kids for DH’s friend, an old man with an age gap of 20years !!
wat do u think of his character ( dh fren) a clever man making lots of money ?
maybe the young woman think current life is tough so bid bye bye to current hub - a example of \" Real Bad woman\" (?) - < i anyhow think one la) -
tyeogh\" post_id=\"1937287\" time=\"1569473192\" user_id=\"94399:
It is true to marry and hv lots of happiness & laughter. That helps when both hv to face crisis, hardships & not-haves.
A topic I teach my daughters often. More than money management (know nothing of it to impart anyway). For a woman, marrying the right man is the most important decision she will ever make in her life. Bec it will have the greatest impact on her life. DD1 and DD2 say I nag. But I know they got the principles of what and how to choose.Estéema\" post_id=\"1937230\" time=\"1569452632\" user_id=\"66413:
This reminds me - hv to sensitize my kids the importance of selecting a suitably mature and responsible candidate for a spouse as the responsibility is for the long haul - love, perseverance, duty, sacrifices.... it’s not a walk in the garden for the faint hearted. It’s either u hv true love to carry you thro the toss & turns of life or you’ve a brave heart to last till those grey hair years & grandkids. Don’t look too far. Enjoy the journey!
Marry a poor man. A sincere man. A humble man. Not calculative with money. Work hard together in life with him.
Marry an ineloquent man. One whose actions of love speaks louder than his words of love. Bec when one loves, one sacrifices. Not expect.
Marry a man that makes her laugh always. Because happiness and compatibility oust money and success. These will get them through tough times.
Most of all, marry a spouse equally yoked. One who believes in God. This will guide his conscience. When she cant convince him otherwise.
In short, I told them to find a man like their father haha!
In reality, s’times we just hv to work out once we made our choices & not be tempted to look for EXIT gate. A marriage grows stronger not just by being happy, but bonding thro the bumps in life.
Man of eloquence, mine not a man of many words, but he loves to talk to me. When we had to face a greedy, selfish financial advisor in court, I’ve wtitten all the facts out but DH not zai type but he’s the signatory, I can’t speak on his behalf. But coz he’s not a flamboyant man nor flowery with words (as oppose to ‘plaintiff’), judge awarded the case in favour of man of few words. I was worried sick & ‘angry’ with DH prior to the close of case. I’m glad we’re stronger after going thro that ‘crisis’ coz at stake was a large portion of our savings. I learnt to appreciate his trusty non-flowery (不花口，诚实) demeanor. Many wld hv been over defensive, worries being taken advantage of and tried to hard to prove it. I was overly anxious but he’s cool. Wonder if some couples will end up quarrel. Wonder some wld quarrel no end & call it a day?
Commitment is a serious thing. I’ve put DH & the family first in that order most times. Trust in each other but foremost, trust in God. I caught an impt phrase an ex-colleague shared once “once you chose to marry the man God appoints, trust in Him and not doubt as this poisons a relationship & our minds”. DH & I always invest jointly and tho we started each with our own accounts, we’ve each used various sums fr our own funds for properties & other investments. I’ve learnt fr an elder “to hv friends, you must extend your hand of frdship first and not sit & wait for others to move”, so I use that adage early in my relationship with DH & in-laws. I’ll always initiate and offer my help and services as if they’re my own parents, brother-in-laws & sister-in-laws.
We make careful choices together & DH has never been stingy or selfish with me & provided well for all our kids & his parents but he feeds veryblittle for his own simple needs and I’m the one who wld prod him on to indulge in a little for his hobby & encourage it as a bonding activity with DS. I take initiate to ensure he eats well & hv appropriate rests when he has big projects at work. I try my best to ensure he doesn’t hv to worry abt his parents & find all ways to sort their family & medical needs.
Our kids need to learn hardwork, perseverance, responsibilities abv grades. These are abilities that’ll carry them through the dark days. There is no PERFECT mate, nor is life gonna be PERFECT. You make it the best you can. Don’t need to chase perfection. Very hard to live if hunting down perfection. -
tyeogh\" post_id=\"1937287\" time=\"1569473192\" user_id=\"94399:
how old are your DDs?
A topic I teach my daughters often. More than money management (know nothing of it to impart anyway). For a woman, marrying the right man is the most important decision she will ever make in her life. Bec it will have the greatest impact on her life. DD1 and DD2 say I nag. But I know they got the principles of what and how to choose.
Marry a poor man. A sincere man. A humble man. Not calculative with money. Work hard together in life with him.
Marry an ineloquent man. One whose actions of love speaks louder than his words of love. Bec when one loves, one sacrifices. Not expect.
Marry a man that makes her laugh always. Because happiness and compatibility oust money and success. These will get them through tough times.
Most of all, marry a spouse equally yoked. One who believes in God. This will guide his conscience. When she cant convince him otherwise.
In short, I told them to find a man like their father haha! -
Cloud Cloud\" post_id=\"1937309\" time=\"1569476021\" user_id=\"160688:[quote=\"Cloud Cloud\" post_id=1937309 time=1569476021 user_id=160688]
Assuming her previous marriage didn't last since her kids still in kindy, it may not last that long for her next.
20 years age gap! Soon, she may need to change his diaper.[/quote] -
I always like to think that many of them will regret at one point of them… so silly, all hard work will pay/paying off, you see the children growing, and you are going back to your二人世界soon with your wife…
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Someone shared today’s marriages don’t last bcoz ppl are more connected to devices more than human beings.
Weaning our kids fr gadgets is impt for their chances to succeed in future relationships. Building relationships need hardwork & commitment. Kids of this generation are too attached to gadgets & lacks the ppl skills. It’s easy to slump over the sofa with a gadget than connect to comfort eye-to-eye talk with your spouse abt the day in office and with kids or parents & kiss for a good night’s slumber. -
Maybe when all of a sudden the focus is back only on each other, that’s when couples start picking on each other also. Cos nothing to divert their attention oredi.
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Nebbermind\" post_id=\"1937333\" time=\"1569478173\" user_id=\"15571:
14 and 15. The curiousity age. The dating age too for those 早熟 kind. I kiasu. Inscribed my teachings early. Wait till find bf, too late liao. As it is, now ady bo hew me.
how old are your DDs?
Train up a child the way he should be. When he is old, he will not depart from it. Hopefully, I have done my part. -
Estéema\" post_id=\"1937332\" time=\"1569477878\" user_id=\"66413:
Sis Estéema,
We make careful choices together & DH has never been stingy or selfish with me & provided well for all our kids & his parents but he feeds veryblittle for his own simple needs and I’m the one who wld prod him on to indulge in a little for his hobby & encourage it as a bonding activity with DS. I take initiate to ensure he eats well & hv appropriate rests when he has big projects at work. I try my best to ensure he doesn’t hv to worry abt his parents & find all ways to sort their family & medical needs.
Beautiful sharing! Thank you so much. I like your hb ady. A breathe of fresh air. In a lost world. -
Estéema\" post_id=\"1937339\" time=\"1569479186\" user_id=\"66413:
This one also got ah. In my chat group. This guy complains his wife addicted to her phone. Both are scholars. High fliers in govt ministry. She sees it as an escape. He wait and wait for her till gave up. Finds his own adult entertainment outside. Weekend become the dutiful father to his young kids. Most men are afraid of Women's Charter. Dun wan to lose kids. So kwai kwai endure. Outsourcing his needs is a temp interim solution.
Someone shared today’s marriages don’t last bcoz ppl are more connected to devices more than human beings.
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