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    Friend wants to borrow money

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Money Matters
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    • laughingcatL Offline
      laughingcat
      last edited by

      Aiyoh! I feel you. I am very sketical of friends joining MLM or insurance agents as well. Loosing a friends is tough. :hugs:

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • FunzF Offline
        Funz
        last edited by

        My experience. Lend money sure to lose friend especially when they will most likely not be able to pay back.


        Don’t lend, friend may become distant but there is still a chance of maintaining contact.

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        • EstéemaE Offline
          Estéema
          last edited by

          Ya, not easy to face a frd asking for loans esp to do a bz. I’ve lost a frd this way some years ago, but heard tt she had ended up cheating a guy to marry her & got her condo & other frds to invest but never returned those money to my other frds, claiming the bz made losses.


          It’s not abt not helping out a frd, but I wld advise them find a job to save up for the bz she’s keen to do. Her hubby probably wise to put in 50% at least some faith to support spouse & she shld try find her own means for the other 50%. If she end up going to 10/20 frds for tt low 4-fig, she might succeed in getting her targeted funds but it’s not her own hard-earned. Will she feel the pain if bz goes downhill to find ways to pick bz up?

          It’s not the money I’m concern abt but the frame of mind towards building her own bz. If she wants to do d bz enuf, she’ll do it with all her own sweat & blood. Is is a frame of mind "not so heart pain" to loose money not mine?

          I’ve loaned some $80K to a young lady who didn’t hv last bit to complete her final year in uni & I think that itself is commendable for I’d like to give that last push of support to a young who’ve not earned her wings as yet.

          ngl2010,


          Hope you make a wise choice.

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          • A Offline
            ammonite
            last edited by

            ngl2010:
            Although she hardly contacted me (like maybe only once every 2 years?), I feel sad losing a friend. We were close when we were still single... :sad:

            That means she has already asked a lot of people and had been turned down by a fair number. Say no, that you and your dh had an agreement on both not lending money and you cannot break agreement. But if she is opening a cafe, you will go and lim kopi in support. If she only calls you every 2 years, it is ok to \"lose\" this friend.

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            • MrsKiasuM Offline
              MrsKiasu
              last edited by

              ngl2010, I second that. no need to lend. if relatives, bo bian. I just kanna too. can tell her that you can be her first customer lor. true, some ppl really wont feel heartache but we will feel the heartache. dont have enough money now can wait till have enough savings first right.

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              • ZappyZ Offline
                Zappy
                last edited by

                Would you rather have the friendship or the cash? Only you can answer that and the answer will point to the decision.


                Note that the friendship may cost even more cash in future.

                We don’t really know the full situation, as in closeness to this person, etc. But I’m with the general sentiment… Don’t lend. May be easier said than done though.

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                • janet88J Offline
                  janet88
                  last edited by

                  Funz:
                  My experience. Lend money sure to lose friend especially when they will most likely not be able to pay back.


                  Don't lend, friend may become distant but there is still a chance of maintaining contact.
                  if lend her money, definitely be prepared they won't return. worse case is the friend will ask to borrow again with all the 'I will return' stuff. if there is once, there will be subsequent times and no end to it.

                  if there is no regular contact but call once in a blue moon, that call is nothing good.

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                  • W Offline
                    What The
                    last edited by

                    Ask yourself… If it is an amount that you can afford to lose - I will say lend it to her.

                    At the end of the day, it is fine to lose a friendship for a small amount.
                    But things may also turn out for the better.

                    To be honest, back years ago, I happened to be retrenched when I placed 1% deposit for a condominium.
                    I am surprised when a friend agreed to loan me $100K for the remaining 4% of the down-payment.
                    I found a job shortly after and everything turns out well.
                    In fact, this is a good friend from uni and we hardly contact after graduation.
                    Very appreciative to him and in fact, our friendship become closer thereafter.

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                    • N Offline
                      ngl2010
                      last edited by

                      I am conflicted. She wants my answer tonight. Sigh... DH said he offered her a proper job a few years back but she turned it down so it is ok to turn down her request this time. :frustrated:

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