How much is enough for retirement in Singapore?
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:snuggles: it is really not easy.. :sad:
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Funz\" post_id=\"2059628\" time=\"1645585614\" user_id=\"6230:
I admire your parents & their care for self in early years, blared you in so many ways - their grandchildren gets to enjoy their company & showering of love; yr kids get to witness how 3 generations shld live & care for each other; lots of stability & peaceful relationships learning fr yr parents!
I am very lucky that both mum and dad are still relatively healthy. Both are kinda hard on hearing so talking to them is a very loud affair. Dad is in his 80s now, he did say that his brain is foggy these days. Told us that he needs time to process what we say and to only tell him 1 thing at a time. Conversations with him can get pretty funny because of all the misheard stuff. Both have their usual aches and pains that comes with age but both are still mobile without major ailments, no 三高。
Dad planned his retirement well. He retired at the age of 55 and is financially sound, even able to go on holidays with us every year. We want to pay for him and mum but he insisted on paying. He is a pensioner so medical for him and mum is all taken care of. He had a triple bypass done when he was 70yrs old, class A ward, specialist doc, etc. All covered. We signed a ton of papers and when the bill came, it was $26. Will never forget how amazed we were. When he was younger he was mindful on his expenditures. Since retiring he is bordering on extravagant especially when it comes to feeding his grandchildren. Because of how well he planned his finances, we, his children don't have to worry about that.
Mum is in her 70s. Mind is still as sharp. She has always been pretty good with numbers. When I brought her to sign up for a mobile plan, she took 1 glance at her new mobile number can could remember it. Me, until today, 3mths down I still cannot remember her number. Someone mentioned 4D, yup, mum is a 4D aficionado. She will buy multiple sets of numbers in all sorts of permutation and remember all of them. Can even remember what numbers came out 2 or 3 weeks ago. She remembers all the birthdays and anniversaries of not just her own children and grandchildren but her sons-in-law, our cousins, their children, etc.
Do keep yr dad in good health after bypass. I wish I belong to Pioneer generation. My FIL’s bill was similar after operations & many hospital admissions, his hospital bills are so well subsidized that we didn’t need to pay much thereafter. Your dad sounds like such a sacrificial & doting grandpa! Reminds me of my dad, whom I lost at 8 yo and didn’t get over till past my 21 birthday, before I resolve not to wallow.
MIL is way past her 80s and in very good health except for 2 highs & sharp mind, learning app TraceTogether & recently texting in chinese via WhatsApp! I hope if I ever live to that age, I’ll be living life healthy like her. We all love her to bits. -
sushi88\" post_id=\"2059613\" time=\"1645580979\" user_id=\"100857:
My goodness. Don't let me get started on it... or I'll rant to no end. Short version: I had 6 months warning, but the stupid young doctor of the hospital I went to claimed my headache was due to \"vertigo\" and sent me for some hearing tests before they decided it was something due to my brain and not my ears. 1 week before I saw their \"brain\" doctor... I had the stroke. Luckily my maid found me and called for the ambulance, which fortunately sent me to TTSH instead of the other stupid hospital.
... Just wondering, did you have any signs that warned you prior to the stroke?
I'm just thankful I had 6 months to \"prepare\" for that stroke. I started exercising by running regularly since I had the headache, and I think I won't be here chatting with you guys if I hadn't.
So, run for your lives! A run a day keeps the reaper at bay. Literally. -
Imp75\" post_id=\"2059634\" time=\"1645590364\" user_id=\"2358:
Imp75 & Funz,
My parents are a bit like funz in terms of health. Both 80s dad no known ailments or pain however mom has 2 highs....been taking medication and her organs are deteriorating we know. My dad still very perky and sharp. Mom I feel a bit lonely as all her elder and younger siblings are gone. Both parents enjoy playing mahjong and I make it a point to play w them almost every weekend or monthly. Till now, my dad is still the sharpest in the game, he can read our tiles and know what tiles we gonna discard or looking to win. Needless to say, he's usually the biggest winner, even my bil who plays poker/daidi by reading cards intelligently also no match in mahjong compared to dad.
Love hearing all your sharings. They’re so positive & encouraging! -
ChiefKiasu\" post_id=\"2059648\" time=\"1645592735\" user_id=\"3:
So you give big bonus to yr helper for saving I early enuf? 😂
My goodness. Don't let me get started on it... or I'll rant to no end. Short version: I had 6 months warning, but the stupid young doctor of the hospital I went to claimed my headache was due to \"vertigo\" and sent me for some hearing tests before they decided it was something due to my brain and not my ears. 1 week before I saw their \"brain\" doctor... I had the stroke. Luckily my maid found me and called for the ambulance, which fortunately sent me to TTSH instead of the other stupid hospital.
I'm just thankful I had 6 months to \"prepare\" for that stroke. I started exercising by running regularly since I had the headache, and I think I won't be here chatting with you guys if I hadn't.
So, run for your lives! A run a day keeps the reaper at bay. Literally. -
Sun_2010\" post_id=\"2059641\" time=\"1645591648\" user_id=\"18393:
Good sharing, Sun_2010. I hope you stay with your dad, as is, for a long time.
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Covid19 has meant we have cut down on our daily walks - he doesnt like to go out at all. But work from home has meant , I get to spend some time with in during the day, I can guidehim with his exercise class, his chanting.
...
Actually, it's still ok to walk outside. Just wear a mask if you are worried. Walk for about 5km, which will take about an hour. If you do it very often, it doesn't matter how fast you walk as your overall distance travelled will be much more effective for your body.
Or invest in a treadmill. That's what's I've been doing. Put it in front of your TV and you won't even know you've been exercising
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ChiefKiasu\" post_id=\"2059648\" time=\"1645592735\" user_id=\"3:
OMG! It sounds like a scary experience indeed! Really thank God for your maid because quick action is very important. I think TTSH really has a good reputation so far from all the various cases I know of. Seriously, I am glad that you are here chatting with us again. And yes, exercise is always important to ensure at least the basic healthy living. Keep going strong!
My goodness. Don't let me get started on it... or I'll rant to no end. Short version: I had 6 months warning, but the stupid young doctor of the hospital I went to claimed my headache was due to \"vertigo\" and sent me for some hearing tests before they decided it was something due to my brain and not my ears. 1 week before I saw their \"brain\" doctor... I had the stroke. Luckily my maid found me and called for the ambulance, which fortunately sent me to TTSH instead of the other stupid hospital.
I'm just thankful I had 6 months to \"prepare\" for that stroke. I started exercising by running regularly since I had the headache, and I think I won't be here chatting with you guys if I hadn't.
So, run for your lives! A run a day keeps the reaper at bay. Literally. -
Estéema\" post_id=\"2059652\" time=\"1645593095\" user_id=\"66413:
Lol... I will be when she goes back to Indonesia.
So you give big bonus to yr helper for saving I early enuf? 😂 -
Sun_2010\" post_id=\"2059641\" time=\"1645591648\" user_id=\"18393:
Sun,
This must be so hard on you. You are a good child, making the effort to connect.
Esteema, I cant imagine the sorrow and struggle you must have faced. Thanks for sharing.
My dad is in his early stages alzheimer's, I found it so hard to believe. He has been an emotional support, so for me to come to terms with this was very hard. Just 5-6 years back , I used to rely on him for some of my financial dealings. He had to nag me on my premiums, and other stuff. And today I have to take care of his finances.
Alzheimers is not just forgetfulness. One can say it is more of confusion, cloudy, being blur. Same thing that is confusing today , they may recall the next day with clarity.
I remember during our circuit breaker period, we would all do some exercise. Dad's job was to be the timer-- look at the clock and tell us how many seconds had passed at intervals. So when we ( the kids and I ) did planks , he was supposed to tell us the time. One day he was quite, I grunted - pa, is it not even 30s? he was silent. And then after a few seconds he asked -- S, how to tell time?
The man on whose lap I sat and learnt to tell time, suddenly forgot how an analogous clock worked.
Next day , it he was ok, he could remember it . He always has his watch on him. How terrifying it must be to realise you are forgetting the basic things. When he gets stressed , it gets worse.
My dad is very well read especially about health. He has been telling ( nagging) on what foods to eat for the past two decades. He has told me hip:waist ratio and omega 3 omega 6, alkaline food, even in the early 2000s when this was not so much in the media. He has even spoken to me about alzhemir's :sad: When the doctor told me he might have dementia, I refused to believe - Not my dad, no, no. The doctor mentioned that it is harder to find symptoms in intellectuals cause they would figure out a way to overcome/cover up their confusion. It often takes a trained person to find out.
What is hard to accept is that it will get worse. You can try very hard to engage him, keep him active, it might slow down the process if at all but it will keep getting worse. He gets quiter and quiter by the day. :gloomy:
Covid19 has meant we have cut down on our daily walks - he doesnt like to go out at all. But work from home has meant , I get to spend some time with in during the day, I can guidehim with his exercise class, his chanting.
When he cracks a silly joke and laughs, it fill my heart. When he comes and sits near me and asks me , \"what happened, you look worried?\" Only he can see thru me intuitively , not even my mum. I feel blessed to have him near me. It may not be for long, but right now I still need him.
Awww, got a bit emotional today ....
I get emotional too, just reading yr loving relationship with yr dad.
I’m truly grateful in a way tt covid had put us back to spending closer & more meaningful time with our families. Our fast paced life tend to put relationships into superficial touch-and-go “how are you getting on” level. I’m warmed by yr special & close bonding with yr dad. It’s nice to S’times share our journey to affirm ourselves that’s life and it’s OK & normal to be emotional. At least better than to be in cold corporate life forgetting to love our family members abit more & stop to hug & laugh with each other.
My brother had Alzheimer and SIL had to spend long hours feeding & chatting with him. She had taken the feeding personally coz it’s not easy for bro to swallow & theres a real danger of him choking on his food, which she alr ensure grind down enuf for bites but not too choking pieces. I tried a few times feeding him but each time he choked. I developed fear of feeding him initially till overcome my fear as it helps when I kept chatting leisurely & more relaxing with him after SIL’s encouragement.
She cld’ve gotten my nephew or the maid to carry him back to his wheelchair or bed, but she’ll patiently hold him up even though she was old & frail herself, and kept instructing him to shuffle his right & then left leg forward to walk towards his seat.
To me, nothing is more valuable then the time taken to love and care for our family. -
ChiefKiasu\" post_id=\"2059655\" time=\"1645593606\" user_id=\"3:
You don’t let go of a gem!
Lol... I will be when she goes back to Indonesia.
Give her a good treat to encourage her care for you & fast action lor
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