$350k for 1 child?
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ksi:
wow, need to take dimsum as my role model....funny ah??? I thought I spoke the truth, nothing but the truth? :?
Glad it made you laugh. :lol: :lol: :lol: -
dimsum:
my dad is a blue collar worker and he has 4 children.
Agreed. My dad could easily pay off his 3 kids' university fees but he insisted that we must all repay back into his CPF account upon our graduation. He could afford to send us for overseas uni education but told us firmly NEVER expect him to finance our overseas edu. If we were so keen, then we had to study hard to obtain scholarships ourselves (but none of us was smart enough lah).
my dad can only afford to finance our sch fees until tertiary/diploma education; up til that, we were however never pressured to undertake part time work as we were clearly told that our responsibilities were to study. despite the tight household budget, we were assured of basic food, lodging, (what entertainment?) and schooling (what enrichment/tuition?). i had the chance on overseas study scholarship (tuition fees only) but did not take it up partly cos i overheard that my parents could not afford to send me there (although i overheard from my dad that he would ensure that i would have enough to spend if i made up my mind to take up the offer). looking back, if i had took up that scholarship, i would be so indebt to my parents that i would have considered settling down at a much older age.
my FIL is a white collar worker and he has 1 child.
dh completed his university via private institute all fully financed by his dad; dh did part time work merely to supplement his own income. because his dad was able to provide for him to complete his uni, we now reap the fruit as on a whole (i don't mean exceptional cases), we all know the salary gap between a diploma grad and a uni grad.
so to me, if i can afford, i will see that my kids get a least a degree. if they are sensible, i will find means to finance their overseas education. -
insider:
That is a very good mindset! Must learn to think and visualize like you! POSITIVELY!
My thought is similar to yours but I will phrase in a more positive way (I always believe have to 'frame' thoughts in positive manner and this takes much conscious practice and the 'thought pattern' will be 'auto' later on to become a positive 'strength/faith'):
I believe that I can see my kids thru a degree financially. Subsequently, I believe they will be sensible to have their means to finance their own postgrad education etc without any more of my financial support.
PS:
In NLP training, they will drill you to get rid of all the negative-implied 'if's in your thoughts.
Children in Adam Khoo training is taught the same thing. NO IFs BUT ONLY CONCRETE GOAL AND GO FOR IT!
:celebrate:
then again, even if I can afford, i will tell my kids i can't... heheheee... just been kiasu in case they slack and expect me to pay for their expensive education and enrichment and maybe tuition too! -
tree nymph:
:celebrate: :celebrate: How come we so similiar...are you my long lost twin? :lol:
then again, even if I can afford, i will tell my kids i can't... heheheee... just been kiasu in case they slack and expect me to pay for their expensive education and enrichment and maybe tuition too! -
I was awarded a scholarship to study maths in NUS, but I rejected it and went to engineering instead because I dreamed of becoming an engineer. My mother did not want me to by indebted by study loans, so she took on 2 jobs to pay for my fees. Both my parents had very low paying jobs. I deeply regretted my choice now. I should have taken up the scholarship or study loan so that my mother did not have to work so hard. She worked everyday from 7am to 11pm, and she still had to do all the housework at home. At that age I was not matured enough, and now when I think about it, I was really a very bad daughter and I felt heavily indebted to her.
Now I am trying to repay my mother by giving her a good allowance every month, and also bringing her to overseas trips every year.
I do not think that by paying for everything for my child, will make her a better person in the future. -
tree nymph:
I told my kids that I am keeping track of how much I pay for them now, and in the future when they start work they have to pay me back
then again, even if I can afford, i will tell my kids i can't... heheheee... just been kiasu in case they slack and expect me to pay for their expensive education and enrichment and maybe tuition too!
I know many parents will criticize me for being calculative, but it is only my way of telling my kids not to take things for granted.
I prefer not to follow the western style of unconditional love like \"The Giving Tree\" by Shel Silverstein. I would rather my kids learn from the http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2010/03/books-about-filial-piety.html books
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ksi:
maybe?
:celebrate: :celebrate: How come we so similiar...are you my long lost twin? :lol:tree nymph:
then again, even if I can afford, i will tell my kids i can't... heheheee... just been kiasu in case they slack and expect me to pay for their expensive education and enrichment and maybe tuition too!
:hi5: -
tamarind:
[list]I was awarded a scholarship to study maths in NUS, but I rejected it and went to engineering instead because I dreamed of becoming an engineer. My mother did not want me to by indebted by study loans, so she took on 2 jobs to pay for my fees. Both my parents had very low paying jobs. I deeply regretted my choice now. I should have taken up the scholarship or study loan so that my mother did not have to work so hard. She worked everyday from 7am to 11pm, and she still had to do all the housework at home. At that age I was not matured enough, and now when I think about it, I was really a very bad daughter and I felt heavily indebted to her.
Now I am trying to repay my mother by giving her a good allowance every month, and also bringing her to overseas trips every year.
I do not think that by paying for everything for my child, will make her a better person in the future.- Actually I feel that by been obedient and study hard is been a filial as a school going kid. And when we start working, we still should respect them and take care of them, and this is also been filial. I truly think you are doing very well and setting good examples for your kids.
[/list]
:celebrate: - Actually I feel that by been obedient and study hard is been a filial as a school going kid. And when we start working, we still should respect them and take care of them, and this is also been filial. I truly think you are doing very well and setting good examples for your kids.
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tree nymph:
:hi5:
maybe?
:hi5:
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tamarind:
Tam darling, i keep ALL receipts in my BIG book since the first time theyI told my kids that I am keeping track of how much I pay for them now, and in the future when they start work they have to pay me back
I know many parents will criticize me for being calculative, but it is only my way of telling my kids not to take things for granted.
enrolled in kindy. :evil: How? Track secure anot? :lol:
No one has a right to criticize others cos we all have our own way of doing
things especially when it comes to raising our children. :hugs:
Children SHOULD NEVER take things for granted. That's definitely a start.
That's why before the girls sleep each night, i remind them to count their
blessings. This way they reflect and learn to appreciate even the littlest
things in life. And... the simplest things in life CAN be rewarding more
than we know it.
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