All About Autism

[schweppes]

ImMeeMee:

I do believe that the child will get better after hitting the bottom, just that it is difficult to cope with the emotional distress as a parent at that particular point. It is painful to see your child trapped and feel helpless about it.

Going through the bad spell can be a difficult period. It's like a \"what have I done wrong\" feeling. You go through so many emotions like \"I thought he/she is improving\", \"will it get better?\"

I tell myself that I have to stay strong, people tell me that I have to stay strong. But sometimes, it's anything but. Really easier said than done.

And yet, we have to stay strong. When I read LKY's interview with the NY Times, and the interviewer asked how he copes watching his wife suffers and he replied, \"what can I do? Life goes on\". That really struck a chord in me.

I can imagine what he must be going through, watching his loved one suffer and feeling helpless. Guess that's what us mothers and fathers go through as well, when we watch our child or a loved one suffer. \"What else can I do?\" Do I feel like it's doom and gloom sometimes? Yes. But, still, we soldier on. And we try to hang in there. And pray that the good times will come again.

I don't mean to get all religious here but for me, faith was what pulled me through. I'm not a deeply religious person, but as a Catholic, I prayed very hard - for strength, for faith. I really believe that it is with Divine intervention and family support that I have the strength to carry on helping my child.

Just my humble sharing...

[ImMeeMee]

[quote=\"schweppes

Hey IMM,
My child is not on a GFCF diet. I tried that when she was between 3-5yo, but it was really difficult to administer. So, in the end, had to give up the idea.

But I do take note of what she eats and what are some of the trigger foods. Excessive intake of sweets and chocolates lead to meltdowns. It's been said that foods high in salicyliates are trigger foods that may affect the child's behaviour and learning ability.

However, even since I discovered Enzyme Therapy, I noticed that it has helped manage her behaviour better. The enzymes help to break down the food better for better absorption and digestion.

Hope that helps. [/quote]

thanks schweppes. i guess the concept remains to cut the supply of gluten, casein and salicylates in the diet, either by abstinence or by intervention with enzyme therapy for further breakdown.

our current challenge pertains to salicylates as they seem to be everywhere, even in fruits. after cutting gluten and casein and if we cut salicylates further it seems as if dd has nothing else left to eat.

so we are currently considering enzyme therapy but we are still in the process of convincing ourselves on the risk-benefit ratio.

[ImMeeMee]

thanks autumnbronze and schweppes for the kind words once again. it has made my journey easier.

[ImMeeMee]

dear wawa


sorry that i am responding to your post only now, as i have just visited the thread on ‘what do we want our children to become’

i can understand the anguish that you are facing as i have recently experienced that in my dd3. actually no matter how hard we try to describe it, no words can truly reflect how we feel - confused, grief, scared, loss, anxiety …

the biggest fear of a mother is the loss of her child, and for a ASD mother this fear is especially real, cos even if the child is physically with us we constantly fear that we have lost the child in his/her own world and the helplessness that we are not able to reach out to him/her. For me, she is there but not there.

even up to now i am still swinging to and fro within kubler’s grief, a few months after the assessment. at times when things are normal and I am at peace with myself, pangs of pain, hurt and loss can still hit me out of the blue and catch me unprepared.

what will dd3 be when she is grown up? that was one question that first hit me and dh when we first suspected her of ASD. and the mere thought of it broke both our hearts at that point. but we are focusing on what we can do to help her currently. we have even stopped questioning the psychologist’s assessment.

the parents in KSP have been very kind in their words of encouragement when they see my posts, and I am truly appreciative. But the internal emotional war is mine and mine alone to deal with. I have no answers for you on your emotional turmoil, but I hope my words can help provide some solace. you could be crying and laughing at the same time while you are reading this, cos it is a whole string of mixed feelings to be able to feel the loss and not feel alone about it. it is a phase that we all go through. that’s just part of our lives as ASD mums.

I will send you a PM in a short while.

[hl_ng]

Hi,


I have a boy who is also ASD at 6, going to main stream next yr… now my main worry is how to cope in his new school.

Can parent share how do you cope with the school, teacher and their behaviour?

Ng

[lim_013]

i may not be expert, i do know how the important of having balance nutritions from kids.

I was browsing on nutritional benefit and found something, hopes these helps.

http://www.foodforthebrain.org/content.asp?id_Content=1632

[daisyt]

Hi ImMeeMee, I am here!!!


You and other mums here are wonderful mothers! I am really nothing, compare to you all. I feel lost on dd's issues. When compare to your issues, mine are tiny ones. Reading the post here, it gives me lots of encouragement. Jia you everyone! We can do it! :love:

[schweppes]

hl_ng:

Hi,


I have a boy who is also ASD at 6, going to main stream next yr.. now my main worry is how to cope in his new school.

Can parent share how do you cope with the school, teacher and their behaviour?

Ng

It is important to get the school's support on this. If you are willing to disclose your child's condition, it would be good to inform the school like school counsellor (if any), VP (or Principal) and the teachers teaching your child.

For a start, u may wish to talk to the P or VP to get the Head's support. Do this either early Nov or some time early Dec. However, you need to time this right. Avoid the period when it's near the PSLE results and Sec1 postings. Don't think the P or VP will be in the mood to see u. Good to make an appointment in case the P or VP is away on their Dec hols. Once you have their support, it's easier to work with the teachers after that.

When school reopens next year, make an appointment to meet or talk to the teachers some time in Jan. In fact, it would be good to speak to the form teacher within the first 2 weeks.

The teachers would probably feel a little apprehensive handling a special needs child as they don't know what to expect. You might also want to prepare a list informing the teacher some of your child's traits and behaviour; and what are the remediation strategies to help manage your child.

The important thing is to seek the teachers' cooperation. Inform and assure the teachers that all of you (parents, teachers, school) are partners who are working towards helping your son cope better in school.

It is important to assure the teachers that on your part as the parent, you are there to support the teacher as well. This reinforces the partnership understanding.

At the same time, prepare your ds and help him to understand what to expect. Using visual aids or graphic organisers might help him prepare the school day's events. Draw a timetable for him, etc.

It would be good to get the teachers to identify a buddy for you ds. Not the older P3 buddies but a class buddy (or better still, a group of friends or nice classmates) who can help your ds cope better in class. When the kids are younger, most children have a natural desire wanting to help each other.

There will be the ups and downs getting you ds to settle in. But with a good support system, the child will slowly fit in.

All the best :celebrate:

[ImMeeMee]

daisyt:

Hi ImMeeMee, I am here!!!


You and other mums here are wonderful mothers! I am really nothing, compare to you all. I feel lost on dd's issues. When compare to your issues, mine are tiny ones. Reading the post here, it gives me lots of encouragement. Jia you everyone! We can do it! :love:

hi daisyt, good to see you at this thread. actually its always about relativity. Compared to mothers whose kids need invasive therapy (for whatever reasons), my issues are also relatively small, becos thankfully dd3's therapies are non-invasive. at times i also do feel shy about complaining and venting online ... :oops:

so no need to feel small. you can feel lost now, but one day you will find your way. just remember not to lose hope.

[ImMeeMee]

hl_ng:

Hi,


I have a boy who is also ASD at 6, going to main stream next yr.. now my main worry is how to cope in his new school.

Can parent share how do you cope with the school, teacher and their behaviour?

Ng

it is in itself a fantastic achievement that your ds can attend mainstream school at 7.

i am mentally prepared that my dd3 will be delayed in her academics. thanks for showing me that ASD children can also achieve their milestones on time. i am hopeful that my dd is able to do like your ds when time comes.