Do our children have to do what parents like them to do?
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I think it really depends on what is the pursuit.
My dd is withdrawn and very self conscious when she was younger. We packed her off to speech and drama classes which she absolutely detest. When other kids were performing, she would stand still like a pillar (as a silent protest) & refused to participate.
4 years down the road....She's still attending speech classes. We no longer have to coax her to attend. She asked to attend. Earlier this year, she even volunteered to give a presentation during her school assembly. We've indeed come a long way :lol:
On a separate activity - dancing. We figured out she detests dancing after spending 6 months in Chinese dance. She prefers more intellectual pursuit like xiangqi, weiqi & solving IQ puzzles. Ok, dancing is not critical, we let her be. At least we provided an opportunity for her to try out this activity. Accepted the fact not everyone is cut out to be dancing queen. -
Difficult to say. Sometimes, we won’t know until they try right? As a parent, if my kid is very bookish, quiet and introvert, I may want to create more opportunities for him/her to participate in some outdoor stuff just to stir some interest. If after a few tries and they really show no interest or even dislike, then so be it. Cannot fault a parent for trying to steer the kid in what they deem is the right direction.
And like it or not, sometimes, parents just have to push their kids to take up stuff that they may not like cos it is a useful life skill. -
I agree with the comments above, that's why sometimes I push my way in. But my purpose is to make them have 'easier things' in the future.
Let say in my DS case, he is fond of basketball, but he enjoys basketball for fun. So I pushed him more in terms of sending him to camps, get more skills that he could, and hopefully he could use this as a backup plan to enter Secondary School thru DSA.
Sometimes he feels he is being pushed too much but sometimes he feels blessed that I pushed him a lot as he could be in the school team. He has a pack of practice schedule throughout the year end holiday so he could not really enjoying this holiday, no overseas tour(means save $$$ for me :lol: )
Maybe they are just too young to understand at first but later they will fully understood. -
when we first started swimming lessons, my ds1 wanted to quit. he was scared and was shy (the coach was a bit loud). we pressed on and now although he can’t swim fast, he can swim.
when ds1 told us that he find wushu boring and tiring, we stopped cos it was not crucial to learn martial arts and we see that he does not have the flair. -
jedamum:
i think swimming is a bit different. gotta learn to swim for basic survival.even primary schools may make it compulsory to know swimming. probably gotta decide when is the right age to start.when we first started swimming lessons, my ds1 wanted to quit. he was scared and was shy (the coach was a bit loud). we pressed on and now although he can't swim fast, he can swim.
when ds1 told us that he find wushu boring and tiring, we stopped cos it was not crucial to learn martial arts and we see that he does not have the flair. -
May I know when is the right age for my DD to learn swimming? She is 3yo now and seem like she is quite keen… => likes to play water lah… sometimes she will tell me she wants to go swimming.
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mambobb:
May I know when is the right age for my DD to learn swimming? She is 3yo now and seem like she is quite keen.. => likes to play water lah.. sometimes she will tell me she wants to go swimming.
There's no 'right age'. As long as your child is ready, go ahead.
My boy started formal swimming lessons at 2.5yo (not those infant/toddler swimming classes).
He's turning 4 in Jan and he can swim very well without float now.
In fact, his coach was telling me that I might want to consider long-term and think about competitive swimming for my boy.
You know how the coach get my boy to swim real fast?
\"Finish 3 laps & you can go play at the waterslide\" -> Then you will see my boy swim like a fish -
mrswongtuition:
wow, mrswongtuition, didn't know kids can start swimming so young! is yours one-to-one lesson?
He's turning 4 in Jan and he can swim very well without float now.
In fact, his coach was telling me that I might want to consider long-term and think about competitive swimming for my boy.
You know how the coach get my boy to swim real fast?
\"Finish 3 laps & you can go play at the waterslide\" -> Then you will see my boy swim like a fish -
foreverj:
Group. I'm paying $50/month.
wow, mrswongtuition, didn't know kids can start swimming so young! is yours one-to-one lesson?mrswongtuition:
He's turning 4 in Jan and he can swim very well without float now.
In fact, his coach was telling me that I might want to consider long-term and think about competitive swimming for my boy.
You know how the coach get my boy to swim real fast?
\"Finish 3 laps & you can go play at the waterslide\" -> Then you will see my boy swim like a fish
Can't afford $200++ a month just for swimming because he has other activities too. -
It’s hard to say. My DS1 loves ball games, but he’s really scared of new situations and can be frustratingly timid. We decided to send him for soccer class, but we just knew he would have problems adjusting in the initial period. True enough, he didn’t want to participate in the first lesson at all. He just stood at the sidelines and watched. We asked ourselves if we should forget about the class, but decided that we should not allow our son’s timid nature prevent him from doing the things he likes. So we persevered. By the third lesson he had lost his inhibitions was enjoying himself thoroughly. Now he looks forward to his class every week.