No motivation to study in Sec 1, how???

[ttlkbs]

Thx tamarind. I read this article last night when browsing thru’ the forum hoping to gather more tips to help both myself & DS. A long article & I need time to digest in order to put into practise. But just curious if this will work better with kids of younger age rather than a youth?

[tamarind]

ttlkbs,

I believe the same techniques can work for teenager. It will of course be best to start when the child is young, but if parents have not already been doing it, it is not too late to start at 13 years old.

Here is another good article :
http://www.parents-and-kids.com/blog/en/2008/12/how-to-motivate-teenagers-to-be-their-best/

[ttlkbs]

Thx Tamarind.

Guess is also the expectation that i hv on him that drives me crazy when he doesn’t perform.
Before arriving home after work these few days, I kept reminding myself ‘let go, let go!’ & it does help to relax myself once i reach home. Today instead of screaming at him for lying on the bed watching TV for hours, I told him : this is a gentle reminder to u to make good use of the next 3 days for ur exam. He simply said :"i know, i know.Today is exception coz is Fri & juz taking a break after 2 papers." So instead of the usual lecturing & telling how he shld do & what he shld do, I ended the conversation with "Good." No yelling, no screaming,…a peaceful night!

[QuiteKSMum]

Hi ttlkbs,


Just some thoughts ... maybe yr family can have more family bonding activities ( if you have not already done so...). Our family enjoys doing these things together :

1. Karaoke - son loves singing now, but DH will just zzzzz ...
2. Bowling
3. Having breakfasts together during weekends - Hans, Delifrance, Amei, Swensen etc - px q.reasonable ( hawker ctrs we also patronize but not as conducive, but still ok...)
4. Travelling - letting everyone have their say / opinions - sense of involvement
5. Just go anywhere that kid feel like going ( during non exams time of course)
6. Family gatherings - help child get close to cousins, uncles, aunties etc. Sometimes kids prefer to confide in others than their own parents. If they're close to some close relatives/friends, added avenue for them to seek help ...

Other forummers might want to contribute. Maybe we shd have a new thread, since seems like Off- Topic!

Anyway, :celebrate: .

[daisyms]

My son, 14 years old, has recently picked up this habit. He study while watching movies from the laptop. He wouldn’t listen when I told him not to do that. He promised he will not fail his exam. I appreciate very much if parent here can share your experience if your child does the same thing.

[QuiteKSMum]

Hi daisyms,


My son, 13, has developed this habit of listening to music thru iPod, iPad etc when doing his work, or worse, while revising. He also likes to surf to Youtube, FB, Wiki etc when he's on laptop for \"official work\". Hard to convince him otherwise, also heard fm friends with similar age grp kids also have similar \"problems\". I'll see how he fare in this SA before taking action, if any...

What I don't like abt ear-pc is that I have this phobia that he might get deaf in his ears! Told him to listen as backgrd music ( thru stereo set) but he refuses - generation gap?? :?

[ttlkbs]

Seems that kids at this age behave the same, so not only mine.....He used to defend himself saying that now is the new era & I belongs to the old era, so our values are totally different. But I told him something will nvr chg over times & tides. But still hard to convince him coz almost all his peers behave the same! But of course there are still a handful good ones which I knew of in his class. Why can't he be one in this group? :frustrated:

[tamarind]

The truth is that many teenagers behave this way all the way until they become adults. I have seen so many students (age over 17) who do not study at all, and do not care that they fail all subjects. It is a pity because many of them are actually quite smart and should have done much better.


The handful of good ones who are very motivated, are either those who are very smart and competitive and want to stay ahead of others, or those from low income families who understand that they must do well in order to have a better life.

For the majority of kids who already have everything like iphones, ipads, laptops, PSPs, etc, it is difficult to expect them to be self motivated to study. We have to find a way to make them understand why they must study hard, and make them understand the consequences of not passing exams. We cannot do so only by nagging, it is best to let them experience the consequences, not just failing exams, but what life will be like without an ‘A’ level cert, diploma or degree.

[QuiteKSMum]

tamarind:

...... it is best to let them experience the consequences, not just failing exams, but what life will be like without an 'A' level cert, diploma or degree.

Err .... tamarind, how to let them experience the consequences of what life will be like without the relevant certs?

[tamarind]

QuiteKSMum:

tamarind:

...... it is best to let them experience the consequences, not just failing exams, but what life will be like without an 'A' level cert, diploma or degree.

Err .... tamarind, how to let them experience the consequences of what life will be like without the relevant certs?

I used to live that kind of life when I was growing up. Some examples : we had no air-con, so when it was too hot, I used to sleep on the cool hard floor. We did not have a TV, and I had to stand outside of my neighbour's door to watch TV. I have also experienced hunger before. It is actually very easy to do, just remove all luxuries will do.

Otherwise, no matter how much you nag at the child, he is not going to understand, best for him to actually experience it.