Children Suicide Cases
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insider:
These kids suicide cases really disturb me. Sigh...why like that???
Insider, thanks for posting these stories. Really disturbing indeed. I'm not sure if the suicide rate has increased or not in the recent years, but we all know that our children these days are really stressed.
We hear of children strickened with cancer like Charmaine fighting for a chance to live long enough to go to Primary school... and we hear of a boy who surpassed the odds of only having half a heart to even enter Secondary school. Such stories of the courage and the will to live is unfortunately dampened by these stories of children taking their own lives.
Why do the dying see life so differently from the living? Do we all need a constant reminder that our time in this world is limited before we can value life for what it is - borrowed time from heavens that can only be spent, and never refilled? -
Personally, I do not like the various press reporting all these suicides for the sake of reporting it and making it so accessible to all. Not that I am in denial or that I dun want to know that it is happening but more because for the impressionable kids, the more they see these in the news and media and all, the more they think it is ok. Granted that they do talk about it among themselves but if these things are not in the media, then they may not be so blase about it.
The impression that I am gathering when I come across all the comments and discussions about a certain teen suicide, it inevitably heap a lot of blame and criticism on the parents and society at large and a lot of sympathy for the deceased. I may be skewed in my thinking but I feel that such reactions actually give teens who have suicidal tendencies some level of encouragement to take that final step cos they think that they can "make a statement or with that step pple are going to take note and yes, finally, the pple who has caused me all the grievances are going to be ‘punished’".
These kids need support and a channel to voice whatever helplessness they are feeling yes, but they also need to be educated that suicide is not acceptable or ‘cool’ and is shameful.
I know there are genuine cases where the kid really feels that there is no way out but I also think that there is a fair number of them who are doing it partly out of spite or under the impression that it is brave or cool.
Anyways, just my thots. -
In the chinese papers today... They published an article regarding this 9 yr old girl who was stressed with getting good grades that she started pulling her hair out whenever she was stressed to the extent that there were bald patches.
Is this the price that we have to pay in order for society to progress? :stupid: -
Thanks insider for highlighting these real issues that are still happening ard us.
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insider:
Like what the article mentioned... It becomes an option for the kids simply becos to them, their parents also did it
Kids see the way we handle our stress in work / in managing family life / etc and we are just their key model when coming to handling problems / stress in life...
... Really cant imagine the dark shadows that such an act leaves on the kids that it comes back to haunt them.
Seriously is it becos our parents generation onwards, lives are getting better that we get spoilt, privileged and complacent? It's sad to see that people who are born unprivileged/disadvantaged, have much stronger fighting spirit, will and perseverance to overcome their hardships... Whereas able-bodied people are comparatively more \"weak-minded\" and succumb to difficulties more easily. -
westmom:
Yes. I remember someone told me she and her husband caned their son for carelessly omitting a whole page of questions in his Exam paper. That happened when the child was in his lower primary. According to her, the canning is to teach him a lesson so that he would not ever be so careless again. I shudder to think what his parents might have done to him when he was unsuccessful in his GEP selection test. This boy went on to top his level at school every year, won competitions and is now in a top IP school. I wonder what kind of adults, kids who were brought up in this manner will turn into one day. Another Annabel Chong? Another Suffia? Poor boy, I don't think he is happy, despite his academic success.
Yes, its amazing how one's \"score\" can trigger so much negative reactions from some parents. I have seen \"scoldings/ear pulling/punishment\" the moment one finds out about the results and most don't realise that schools are very fond of setting harder paper and so it is so difficult to get Band 1 or even Band 2 in upper primary. In some top schools, scare tactics started even in Primary 3. It's like a mentality die die must get Band 1/2 and if they don't, all hell break loose. My dd doesn't hide her so called \"bad results\" from me now because I tell her it does not mean anything until I see her level average or class average mark. Usually the level or class average is only revealed much later and meanwhile she does not fear about being forthcoming with me . I tell her that \"as long as I know she puts in effort and works hard\", the outcome is secondary.insider:
My daughter could add 15 marks to her marks (my instruction) and she knew she would be on safe side. Just sad that some parents just don't know how tough exams are and see the marks in literal form without doing some 'curving'. These are performing kids* as far as know (she belongs to the second best class in school).
Just hope that all kids can make their way home safely to face whatever consequences with whatever results... School is simply too harsh on them...
*Her class O levels L1R5 average 8 points before incentive points. -
[quote]Below case is the second case of Pioneer JC who followed friend's footstep. One class two cases, those classmates must be having nightmares at night. Ultra unfortunate to be in a class like this. If the class has 40 students and if a researcher were to trace the well being of the balance 38 students into their adult life, chances are some may do the same (suicide shadow very difficult to shake off and this class of kids has double shadow). Like said before, kids may look 'normal' when their close one committed suicide but this suppressed shadow may float up any one day when they are in troubles and be attracted to the 'solutions'...
[/quote]I am currently working in MNC where the head office is in US. The company is located in a small sleepy town where majority of the colleague will know each other on a name basis. I was surprise that the personnel will send mass e-mail on someone who departed due to illness or accident and reach out to those who is need of counselling to call or report to personnel. I thought it was strange then.
Reading on such report of student committing suicide, the classmates or those close stricken by grief or guilt might one day haunt them to do the same, makes me realize why there is a need for counselling. I wonder if teachers are inform to look out/reach out for kids who are closed or related to the suicide incident.
Just a personal incident which happen to me when I was 18. A very close friend of mine was killed suddenly in a road accident. I can't describe the feeling now but what I can say is that I was on the verge of depression. Not eating (can't seem to swallow the food), cried in the middle of tutorial / lecture / an immediate slacken of work produce, change of personality from cheerful to sullen. The lecturers were aware of my situation then but none actually help to reach out a helping hand.
As parents, we are the ones who should be able to know our kids well enough and if such incident happen, no matter how normal our kids behave, do try to reach out by spending time with them. It takes a while for the grief or guilt to set in and there will be hints of subtle changes that you will notice. -
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WOW!!!
kiasu_princess :ugogirl:
I'm really impressed with your maturity for your age.. :celebrate: -
IL Probs thread is a place to bitch and share.
If you read carefully, the sharings there are
to share with others that despite the issues
we may face there is light at the end of the
tunnel and that soon as humans we CAN
forgive and forget. That if there are others
who are facing challenges along the same
line, they are not alone and that it is possible
to overcome.
I have a million of other issues which are too
personal to include in that thread, other than
being post-natally depressed & so alone without
my family and cannot go out with friends, that
added on to the stress then. But i don’t suppose
that is any of your concern either to fume. Some
people have no money and they feel suicidal, but
for those who have they won’t understand until they
lose every penny and driven to desperation.
Different people have different suicidal thoughts
due to different issues that affects them terribly.
DON’T judge by the little things you read or you
think you know. Only the sufferer knows that.
If in future WHEN you’re married and have yer
own family of your own, then you WILL know
there’s more 2 life than just getting good grades
and being in GEP. Post-natal stress has been
known to be deadly especially coming from a
3rd party and without any external pillar of
support or strength. Grow up a bit first b4 you
contribute such blaphemous content as your
only 2nd posting here. Very appalling indeed.
The fact the i’m still alive and kicking shows that
i managed to overcome the phase which i found
was difficult for me to undertake alone with a new
family (My IL’s) and a husband that i was only
beginning to get to know and live together under
one roof. I also married quite young.
You won’t know all until you’ve seen it all. So…
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