Club SAHM
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jedamum:
my husband expects me to clean the house and teach the kids. any stuff that he offers to help is on a 'goodwill' basis as 'unspoken' rule, he brings home the bacon, i tend the nest. the alternative is that i go out to work and i still have to tend the nest.
Wow, your dh spoils market le
I always remind my dh I did not quit my job to be a house maid. I would jump on dh if he dares to harbour similar expectations. My plan is to spend time with kids. Full stop.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill :evil: -
sleepy:
I love this line.jedamum:
my husband expects me to clean the house and teach the kids. any stuff that he offers to help is on a 'goodwill' basis as 'unspoken' rule, he brings home the bacon, i tend the nest. the alternative is that i go out to work and i still have to tend the nest.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill -
sleepy:
Will remember this line the next time I have use of it :evil:
Wow, your dh spoils market le
I always remind my dh I did not quit my job to be a house maid. I would jump on dh if he dares to harbour similar expectations. My plan is to spend time with kids. Full stop.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill :evil: -
hehe, u r a cool champ, sleepy…
That’s what i told my DH before i quit my job -kids are my priority where housework and cooking are really secondary. if i have no time for cooking/housework, he rather we eat out than see my black face… haha -
Sigh! So most of us are feeling the same, under appreciated! Some days I really wanted to quit and go back to work but when I saw my DD’s face, I couldn’t bear to leave her at the nanny’s again.
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Actually sometimes I think SAHM has the stigma of being a notch lower in status :gloomy:
Dunno am I being over sensitive, but despite all the 'flowery' words from relatives/friends etc, the underlying message seems to always boil down to
- SAHM have much easier life at home (to some extend yes, but it's a sacrifice/trade off we have consciously made). WorkingPeople (WP) gotta work so hard and cannot have good-life at home like us
- SAHMs' contributions is valued at a lot lesser than WP
A lot of times, gotta try to be Ah-Q & ignore the remarks by others....else I'll probably start feeling inferior and negative.
Guess SAHM here, we need to give more moral support to each other. :please: -
cwc:
cwc,Actually sometimes I think SAHM has the stigma of being a notch lower in status :gloomy:
Dunno am I being over sensitive, but despite all the 'flowery' words from relatives/friends etc, the underlying message seems to always boil down to
- SAHM have much easier life at home (to some extend yes, but it's a sacrifice/trade off we have consciously made). WorkingPeople (WP) gotta work so hard and cannot have good-life at home like us
- SAHMs' contributions is valued at a lot lesser than WP
A lot of times, gotta try to be Ah-Q & ignore the remarks by others....else I'll probably start feeling inferior and negative.
Guess SAHM here, we need to give more moral support to each other. :please:
on the few occasions when i mentioned to total strangers that i am a sahm, i get positive remarks. they still feel that on the whole, kids are better left to the care of their own mothers.
only on 1 instance when my bro insensitively complained that my degree is a waste. i told him off by saying that my husband can afford to keep me at home, but can he (the bro) do the same for his wife? :torchme:
after a while, his wife became a sahm. -
the worse is when a working mum turns her nose up at a sahm. goodness gracious..... :roll:
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LOLMum:
the worse is when a working mum turns her nose up at a sahm. goodness gracious..... :roll:
working moms think sahms have good life. sahms like me wish that i can spend a few hundreds each time just to bring the family for a musical/performance without having to consider my budget.. -
LOLMum:
the worse is when a working mum turns her nose up at a sahm. goodness gracious..... :roll:
I know what you mean. Personal encounter with such working mums.
One working mum commented her son still cannot read. So I helpfully share my experience about Kumon. Guess what, she said why so kiasu, stay home to send kids to this class that class. Then she proudly declared that her children never attend any classes. But her dd told me she goes tuition le :rotflmao:
Another working mum asked me when I started staying home when she saw my kids reading chapter books in preschool. Then brush aside & said oh no wonder my kids can read so well. But her facial expression is soooo sour
I stopped discussing about my kids' developments or offering my kind advice to acquaintances since years ago. Lesson learned, keep low profile. Either way it came out 'wrong' since they already cemented their impression of SAHMs
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