In-law problems?

[Chenonceau]

I think it is important to stand up for the in-laws (even if you dun like them), against this pressure to sell the roof over their heads. It really is psychologically healthier for older folks to have a place they can call their own… rather than live as a guest in a DIL’s home.


The reality of staying together is very different from the ideal. I have seen old folks threaten to run away from a home they don’t feel at home in… and they’re miserable because they have given up all they have for their kids and they are too old to earn more.

The PIL can move in together with your BIL to TRY OUT the arrangement and rent out their flat for extra income. Then if it does not work out, they will still have a place to stay. Saying this upfront should not put you in bad light because it is a very reasonable position to take… and since you don’t stand to benefit from NOT selling, your good intentions should be very clear.

Thank goodness Janet, you aren’t a greedy and grasping person. If ALL the children gang up to force the old folks to sell, then I think the 2 elderly folks will not be able to resist the pressure.

[mummy of 2]

Ultimately it’s up to the old folks if they wanna sell. Just like in my sil’s case we can’t interfere too much or it will strain the relationships becos my ils are in favour of helping their (downright selfish) daughter.

[janet88]

Chenonceau:

I think it is important to stand up for the in-laws (even if you dun like them), against this pressure to sell the roof over their heads.


Thank goodness Janet, you aren't a greedy and grasping person. If ALL the children gang up to force the old folks to sell, then I think the 2 elderly folks will not be able to resist the pressure.

Yes, you are all so right.
Even though I don't like the old ones, I certainly do not agree to sell that flat.
They must have their own place. It's not that I'm rich but definitely do not want to benefit from this whole thing. As long as the flat is in their hands, I don't get bothered.

That idiotic greedy fella wants everything in his favor...mother to do housework, ironing and maybe cooking. If he convinces the parents to sell the flat, I guarantee he and his wife will throw them on the road...knowing their character. Totally blood-sucking. :mad:

[janet88]

Rockdiva:

Aiyi.. People nowadays r so money mind....if one believes in karma.... The whole world will be so peaceful....

I have to tell u all something...this wife is #2. He divorced first one.
First wife once told me this...she wanted a kid but this idiot told her he only married for that 'thing' :censored: I hated the sight of him from start. Everything I bought for hubby (before marriage) was taken by him. For eg clothes.

[auntieM]

janet_lee88:

Rockdiva:

Aiyi.. People nowadays r so money mind....if one believes in karma.... The whole world will be so peaceful....

I have to tell u all something...this wife is #2. He divorced first one.
First wife once told me this...she wanted a kid but this idiot told her he only married for that 'thing' :censored: I hated the sight of him from start. Everything I bought for hubby (before marriage) was taken by him. For eg clothes.

Hope someone tells the old folks about this 'man'.. ...
Really see this kinda people no up...puiiii :mad:

[janet88]

I finally had the chance to tell hubby about that email he wrote to his eldest bro. Told hubby no matter what, the 3 room flat CANNOT be sold, or else that idiotic bro of his will take the money and throw HIS parents out.

Said that his idiot bro gave parents $500 a month, now wants them to sell flat...he finished the sentence, 'what ? to recoup losses ?'
Giving birth to this son is the worst LOSS of all.

[janet88]

auntieM:

janet_lee88:

[quote=\"Rockdiva\"]Aiyi.. People nowadays r so money mind....if one believes in karma.... The whole world will be so peaceful....

I hated the sight of him from start. Everything I bought for hubby (before marriage) was taken by him. For eg clothes.

Hope someone tells the old folks about this 'man'.. ...
Really see this kinda people no up...puiiii :mad:[/quote]No way...bcos hubby will pity his parents. Like I said, I don't wish for the flat to be sold even though I dislike them. It's for the peace that they stay put in that flat.

[ningning]

Really these days old folks have to very careful about whether to sell or not to sell their flats. Coz my granny who lives with my unmarried aunt had sold their three room HDB flats inorder to live with one of my cousins and also gave more than half of the sale amount to that cousin. Before they made their decision, i have advised them not to do so. The story goes like this, now my granny lives in the nursing home now, while my aunt still lives with my cousin but spend most of her day cocoon in her bedroom and also have to help fetch the cousin’s children to and fro school . My aunt dare not complaint to us, coz its her decision to sell the flat and gave away big sum of money so easily then. Sigh…we also asked to chip in for my granny’s expenses for the nursing home…we thought that cousin had pocket so much of sale money, shouldnt they pay for…

[LOLMum]

thing is most parents have faith in their kids. they dont believe their kids would do such things to them. unfortunately...............



i heard that one of my aunts has to shift house every few months. my dad told her not to sell her flat (convenient and good location) but she did and moved in with her son. though there was no ill-treatment that sort of stuff, she was left alone all the times cos' the son and wife busy with their work and social networking and the grandkids busy with school and dont have much to talk to her about. worse unlike her former place, the son's house is quite a distance away from the main road. stuck at home all day with no one to talk to and nothing to do..........going :siao: . she also has to share a room with the granddaughter. now she will stay with son for a few months, then move to another daughter's house etc.

to them, this is good arrangement but i prefer to keep own house so that i can 横行霸道 there.

[janet88]

It’s very impt to have a place of your own…bcos that’s where you can call the shots. No matter how valuable the flat is, cannot give in to greed and sell it off thinking of bunking in with son. This weekend, I will instill the idea into hubby’s head that their 3 room cannot be sold.


But if they stupidly believe that selling it and staying with that useless brat is a good idea, then good luck to them. That brat is capable of doing anything, partially thanks to his upbringing, and brainwashing by his wife.

If they need money, fine. Stay with the brat and rent out.