How to tell if a child is gifted?

[kiasimom]

Every child is gifted to their parents.


So let’s not pound on whether our child is gifted.

Be grateful that we are blessed with kids.

[tamarind]

kiasimom:

Every child is gifted to their parents.

I don't think that is true, especially after reading so many complains in this forum about kids who are lazy, cannot pay attention, etc...

My boy is not gifted, but I love him very very much.

IMHO it is perfectly fine for a parent to wonder whether her child is gifted. This is what this thread is all about. Whether you like it or not, kids are born with a wide range of abilities. It is not right to teach all kids, especially very young kids, using the same methods.

[keroppi]

kiasimom:

Every child is gifted to their parents.

Every child is a gift to their parents, yes, I agree but gifted? No leh. At least, not to me. :?

[kiasimom]

keroppi:

kiasimom:

Every child is gifted to their parents.

Every child is a gift to their parents, yes, I agree but gifted? No leh. At least, not to me. :?

haha... to me , I feel my children are gifted in their own ways.
Different people have different expectations

[tamarind]

The question of whether there is such a thing as \"gifted kids\" has already been argued to death in a previous thread. There is really no point arguing about it anymore.


Parents who believe that all kids are gifted and nothing should be done to help them before the age of 5, then good for you ! You can just patiently wait for the GEP selection test at P3.

As for parents who think that their kids are exceptionally bright and gifted, and wish to find out what can be done to help their kids before the age of 5, then this thread should benefit you

For example, if you have a child who knows all the 26 letters of the alphabet at 16 months old, not just singing the ABC song, but actually recognize the individual letters in any font, lying sideways or upside down. And you don't remember how you taught him/her. It is fine for you to wonder how to help him/her. I do not agree that nothing should be done for such kids. These kids have the capability of learning to read like a teenager/adult before the age of 4 or 5. But if you expose him to only ABCs, and you don't have a single book for him, then it is a great waste of talent.

And why is it good to read very well at a very young age ? Because reading is the key to knowledge and independent learning. Kids have the least distractions before the age of 5 and this is the best time for them to learn. By the time they enter P1, many factors would have caused him/her to lose interest and concentration.

[i3mum]

–

[tamarind]

i3mum,

You can read this web page to learn about how to identify gifted children.
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/gifted101/p/how_to_identify.htm
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/gifted101/a/giftedtraits.htm

However, it is important to remember that a child does not have to have all of the traits to be gifted.

Your girl is certainly progressing very well. What you need to do now is to provide her with a wide variety of books so that she can read any time she likes. Also make sure that she has access to paper and pencil, you can encourage her to start writing her own stories

[i3mum]

Hi tamarind,


Thanks! I will read up on this. And thanks for your help & information

tamarind:

i3mum,
You can read this web page to learn about how to identify gifted children.
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/gifted101/p/how_to_identify.htm
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/gifted101/a/giftedtraits.htm

However, it is important to remember that a child does not have to have all of the traits to be gifted.

Your girl is certainly progressing very well. What you need to do now is to provide her with a wide variety of books so that she can read any time she likes. Also make sure that she has access to paper and pencil, you can encourage her to start writing her own stories

[Littlefly]

Hello Mummies


I am a newbie to this portal and have been reading up the discussion regarding gifted child or not. As my hb says, every parent would like to think his/her child is special and gifted so i read up to find out more. This thread is very informative thanks to mummies sharing own experience, viewpoints and many useful links posted for further reading.

After reading, I am quite certain that my boy is average (though I used to fantasize he might have some potential).

My boy (2.5 now)
can recognize all colors (coz he has interest)
can piece 4-6 puzzles (coz it has a bull dozer print and i think he did it via memory)
can read simple beginner reader books (again, recite from memory coz he pushes us to read to him again and again. I memorize some of them myself!)
very imaginative, a little spin master like throw his pacificer into milk bottle then claim his toy truck did that (then i discovered leftist are more imaginative but sometimes i think his thoughts are all jumbled up esp at end of the day.)
enjoys reading pictionary

cannot recite 1-10 in proper order (no interest in numbers, while some younger than his age can do that already)
cannot sit still to finish sorting the shapes (easily frustrated when he tries to push a pentagon into a decagon)
can recognize almost all alphabets around 2 yrs (again, only with same set of flash cards)
monolingual (being horrible parents, we laugh at his poor Mandarin pronounciation )
can only write C or O (coz he only has interests in round shapes! but we are not too worried now as he will learn in his kindy)
get complained by CCC teachers almost on daily basis on his cheeky antics or bullying of elder kids by him

I sometimes worry his developmental milestone as he does well in some areas and not so well in others. We do hope however that he will get more street-smart as we see that as survival skills in life later.

Things are different for my nephew. My nephew is a fast learner. He tops his class despite hardly studying at home. No tutors, find excuses to skip class etc. He has good attention span and learns just be attending class. Self taught savvy with computers as my bro and SIL are quite computer illiterate. Start talking very early according to my SIL. He talks about mature topics such as death etc at a very young age since 4 or 5.
However, he could be quite 'different' - he gets depressive and stressed (probably perfectionist and highly self-critical). He has been counselled externally and at school since P2 as he has violent tempers and issue serious death threats (throw them off the building or stab them with knives) to his parents when they don't yield to his wishes. He now claims that he has gone over to 'the dark side' (he idolizes the Darth Vader in the Star Wars). He is quite antisocial- no friends and refused to make any and open his mouth to buy food in school canteen though he's P5 this year(my SIL prepares meals for him everyday).

I am hoping to gather more information on these 2 areas:
1. Developmental milestone (N1/N2/K1/K2)

2. Suggestions on help for my bro/SIL on how to manage the situation with my nephew.

Anyone has similar experience ?
Or any advises to offer on how to (like pyschiatrist)?

Or please point me to the correct thread on these two topics. Thanks

[cnimed]

Two and a half is still very young. I really wouldn't worry as long as the child is happy and healthy and functioning well. The only red flags at this age are speech delay or motor skill delay, but even this can be very variable among kids.


If it makes you feel any better, my second son who is also 2.5 cannot recognise number symbols or more than a few letters. He can count objects, something he picked up through daily life, but we do not spend time drilling him on the symbols. We spend more time doing art and craft and he likes to cycle and to help me with meal preparation (wash and cut vegetables with butter knife). Sometimes ds1 will sit him down and teach him things he (DS1) likes, or they will look through books and magazines together, but on my part, I only answer questions. If he asks me what a number or word is, I will tell him and that's all. My goal for him at this age is more self-care.

Littlefly:

2. Suggestions on help for my bro/SIL on how to manage the situation with my nephew.

If he has been undergoing counselling for years without good results, they should definitely change the external ones they are seeing.

Is the boy under a counsellor or a psychologist? They should look for a psychologist who has experience with bright children, and is familiar with different mood disorders as well as counselling methods. (A psychiatrist uses medication, a psychologist deal more with the psyche. A psychologist is better-trained than a counsellor and can also diagnose different mood disorders.)

Parents will probably need to make some changes as well in family dynamics and communication with the child. From your description, he sounds deeply unhappy with himself and his life. Afterall Darth Vadar was driven by fear and anger to the dark side.

He may need help with socialising, perfectionism and seeing things beyond black and white. It may be worthwhile to think back about how he was when he was younger to see if a pattern or development can be observed. I had to spend a lot of time teaching my son from the side for social stuff when he was 4, constantly widening his perspective, and making an effort to find children with whom he can experience positive friendship as he expected and explaining appropriate expectations.

One of the problems he had was other children laughing or running away from him when they didn't understand the topics he was talking about. It was deeply painful for him to experience that. He had changed from a happy go-lucky-child to a very angry, anti-social one who talked about killing others and himself. I took him out of school for a year and put him in mixed-age activities, and we worked on various issues with guidance from others. Now he's back in school and doing really well socially. He's like the child he used to be again, but more mature.