In-law problems?
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DesertWind:
Prob they are taking the opportunity to visit you AND see what's new in your house :rotflmao: During reunion, old lady told my eldest BIL to get his maid cook for reunion and next year go there for reunion...SIL and I have agreement that we do not want to start this...so SIL told him NO...just continue to eat out. PERIOD.just888:
We went to in-law's place to 拜年， but without fail every year my MIL insisted they must come over to my place to 拜年 too. I already very busy to going to my parents and uncles' place, yet i still need to rush back home to meet their visiting time. I thought should be younger ones goes to the elder's place got the other way round one? To me it is a weird practice, thinking maybe next time I do not go to their place wait for them to come.
Ke...ke...ke...must be because you hardly/never invite them to your house during the year and hence at CNY they take the opportunity to go to your house to look see and kay poh! Or you must have a very nice house?
For me, I use CNY to invite my PIL to my place for lunch and my MIL commented \"Only once a year you invite us!\" but actually they come as and when to see their grandson leh. -
janet_lee88:
Prob they are taking the opportunity to visit you AND see what's new in your house :rotflmao: During reunion, old lady told my eldest BIL to get his maid cook for reunion and next year go there for reunion...SIL and I have agreement that we do not want to start this...so SIL told him NO...just continue to eat out. PERIOD.[/quote]Wa....u and ur BIL's wife so friend friend ?DesertWind:
[quote=\"just888\"]We went to in-law's place to 拜年， but without fail every year my MIL insisted they must come over to my place to 拜年 too. I already very busy to going to my parents and uncles' place, yet i still need to rush back home to meet their visiting time. I thought should be younger ones goes to the elder's place got the other way round one? To me it is a weird practice, thinking maybe next time I do not go to their place wait for them to come.
Ke...ke...ke...must be because you hardly/never invite them to your house during the year and hence at CNY they take the opportunity to go to your house to look see and kay poh! Or you must have a very nice house?
For me, I use CNY to invite my PIL to my place for lunch and my MIL commented \"Only once a year you invite us!\" but actually they come as and when to see their grandson leh.
Sigh....I'm not like this with my BIL's wife. 遗憾！ -
MMM,
I agreed that we need to visit them for respect. But not for them to visit me to 拜年 during CNY. Just weird feeling as my parents side we do not practice that.
DesertWind,
We used to stay together on weekdays before I become a SAHM few months ago. For weekends activities hubby also invite them over, but they have excuses for not coming over. We even have a guest room in our place for parents to stay over too. So far that they only stay over once. But throughout all these years, normal weekend they do not want to come and insisted that within 15 days of the CNY must come over to must place. Hence, they would check our schedule during reunion dinner which are the visitings we are doing and when they will come over. We did shared with them they can come anytime but not to our place to 拜年 .
janet_lee88,
Wah… ur in-law super lor… can ask maid to cook reunion dinner. How can the maid cook without your interference? If the reunion dinner cooked not nice how? Therefore better outsource if none wish to prepare. -
This year no reunion dinner. As we all went away to different places. So yesterday first time step into PILs’ house, brought oranges, angpows… When we got there MIL was in the kitchen cooking dinner (luckily she was not cooking for us, we always eat before going over). She was in a foul mood shouting at her maidS and banging and smashing things around. When we greeted her, she can’t even be bothered acknowledge. Had to greet her again. DH was so pissed with her. FIL could see that the situation was not good, tried to hint to MIL and still she don’t care. Any moment there could be an explosion between us, so FIL quickly told us to go inside and watch TV! DH signalled to me to just leave her in the kitchen and we left after 20 mins in their house.
The story would have been totally different if PIL’s golden boy and wife showed up. We have often witness how MIL could suddenly change from foul mood to win toto mood! All smiles and calling them on top of her voice. There were times when we arrived and PILs thought that their precious had arrived and dashed to the front so happy. See its us and staight away "oh, it’s you ah" and the smile and sunshine all gone. -
Its good to know that Im not the only one with such issues in my life!!! hahahah
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LadyInBlack:
Its good to know that Im not the only one with such issues in my life!!! hahahah
Ha ha...very ah-Q
Well, I also had my share of rantings previously. Now that I vented out my first batch of frustrations, just lying low and reading .... until I buay ta-han then start my cycle of ranting. Seriously, feels better after venting out.
Anyway, now I'm like a crouching tigress......watching and counting down to see when the fav son will psycho MIL successfully to sell away her house. (PILs rented out theirs and shifted in to stay with us since a few years back). Since FIL passed away, fav son has started probing MIL on all her assets, who's name they are under, how much are there in the different accts and even asked why were those $ are joint-name with other siblings' & not his :yikes: Kept bugging her to update her house to be under her sole ownership and then make noise about dun waste money to make will etc. Anyway, MIL finally updated the house to be under her solely a few days ago..... and immediately, MIL started talking about selling her house away (after a weekend meal with fav son)
Before this, MIL has always maintained that one needs to have own house, if she ever wants, can go back & stay. Seems too much of a coincidence to me :skeptical: -
BeContented:
My youngest BIL and his sister ARE eyeing their parents' only possession. My eldest SIL and I have agreed that if those 2 want the flat, then they have to TAKE BOTH till they kick the bucket. The recent trip that idiotic sister and her angmoh hubby came back ALL THE WAY from US was to suck up to the old ones and make sure they haven't forgotten about her...shit.LadyInBlack:
Its good to know that Im not the only one with such issues in my life!!! hahahah
Since FIL passed away, fav son has started probing MIL on all her assets, who's name they are under, how much are there in the different accts and even asked why were those $ are joint-name with other siblings' & not his :yikes: Kept bugging her to update her house to be under her sole ownership and then make noise about dun waste money to make will etc. Anyway, MIL finally updated the house to be under her solely a few days ago..... and immediately, MIL started talking about selling her house away (after a weekend meal with fav son) -
i din really follow what was discussed earlier on. But i definitely agreed that it is never easy to stay with the elderly and it is even so if you are under the same roof with in laws. My mum also has this thinking that no matter what she will stay with my elder sister though i had mentioned to her a couple times for her to stay with me but she just remained silent. My elder sister was my mum "whole world" , she was her "pride" , her life revolve around my sister’s life, her kids etc…I had already accepted this fact long time . As long as i treated my mum with my heart and done what i as a daughter should, and she is happy then i am happy too.
But sometimes my sister will complaint to me that mum had mood swing maybe due to old age? So if they are our own parents and at times we also had to bear with their behaviour or mood , what about PILs whom are not our parents though we should also treat them with respect. It is a very tedious task to be in harmony with PILs if unfortunately they fall on the "not so easy to get along with" type.
for myself i just work with PILs, SILs in their family business, and get all the bruises internally and externally. Its only after i get out , then i can breathe again easily. If stay together, think my marriage would have been dead liao… -
just888:
Super...she very super one :mad: ...don't bother about reunion at all.janet_lee88,
Wah.. ur in-law super lor.. can ask maid to cook reunion dinner. How can the maid cook without your interference? If the reunion dinner cooked not nice how? Therefore better outsource if none wish to prepare.
SIL is the one who plans it every year. Old one doesn't care and doesn't pay anything...which is why I am wondering why she wants to go to SIL's place for reunion. I told SIL we just continue to eat out...don't start the reunion meal at anyone's house. -
fifiyeo:
Then why you still bother to visit them ? I will so pissed that I won't bother.This year no reunion dinner. As we all went away to different places. So yesterday first time step into PILs' house, brought oranges, angpows....... When we got there MIL was in the kitchen cooking dinner (luckily she was not cooking for us, we always eat before going over). She was in a foul mood shouting at her maidS and banging and smashing things around. When we greeted her, she can't even be bothered acknowledge. Had to greet her again. DH was so pissed with her. FIL could see that the situation was not good, tried to hint to MIL and still she don't care. Any moment there could be an explosion between us, so FIL quickly told us to go inside and watch TV! DH signalled to me to just leave her in the kitchen and we left after 20 mins in their house.
The story would have been totally different if PIL's golden boy and wife showed up. We have often witness how MIL could suddenly change from foul mood to win toto mood! All smiles and calling them on top of her voice. There were times when we arrived and PILs thought that their precious had arrived and dashed to the front so happy. See its us and staight away \"oh, it's you ah\" and the smile and sunshine all gone.
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