Sometimes we forget to remember
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Hi EX-Teacher,
Thanks for yr note.
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Recently, I discovered that it is a very common scene that kids are busying playing with their hp/computer games when they are with their parents and waiting for their food to be served. Is happending at coffee shop or restaurant…
I think is sad cos there isn’t any communication btw the kids and their parents.
;-( -
As a full time working mom, I feel guilty everyday that I cannot be with my kids. So instead of bringing them to numerous enrichment classes during the weekends, I decided to \"enrich\" them at home, as much as possible. No matter how tired I am, I make sure that I spend at least 15 - 20 mins everyday with them, either teaching maths or listening to them read out loud to me. The results have been wonderful. I save so much money, and my kids are doing so much better than any enrichment class could have taught them. And most importantly, teaching is a great way of bonding with the kids. As they read out loud to me, we discuss about the meanings of words, act out the story, and we have so much fun and laughter.
No matter how tired we are, we must make sure that we spend quality time with our kids everyday. Only 15 mins of undivided attention for each child is good enough.
Many parents' idea of bonding is to sit together with the kids and watch TV or play computer games. That's why it is very common to see kids playing with computer games and have nothing to say to their parents.
What is there to talk about anyway ? Parents will probably only ask whether the kids have completed their homework, what they have done in school everyday, then they run out of things to talk about.
My suggestion is to find a good book and let your kid read out loud to you, no matter what is their age. The contents of a good book will naturally generate a lot of topics to talk about
My hubby used to be very busy with his work. He did not help out at all when our girl was a baby. Then one day he realized that if he continued like this, our baby girl would not want to be with him at all. Our girl was very choosy even at a very young age. Since she was more than 1 year old, my hubby has been trying his best to spend at least 10 - 15 mins talking to her and playing with her everyday. Our girl is now so fond of her Daddy ! They can sit together and talk for a long long time on a wide range of topics -
Herbie:
Yah, see that a lot these days. I find it down right rude. Be it handheld games or books. These should not be things to be brought to the dining table. DH gets it from me all the time, as he will be reading all his newsflash from his phone during mealtimes.Recently, I discovered that it is a very common scene that kids are busying playing with their hp/computer games when they are with their parents and waiting for their food to be served. Is happending at coffee shop or restaurant...
I think is sad cos there isn't any communication btw the kids and their parents.
;-( -
Hi,
I agree with Tamarind, about the fact that many parents tend to spend time bonding with their kids by watching tv or playing computer games.
An incident happened last wkend when we were at a frd’s place for dinner. They played a cartoon DVD for my 2+ yr old son. After about 10 mins, he wanted to do something else. My frds commented that he had a short attention span!!!
Actually, I do not let my son watch tv unneccesarily. He watches about half an hour at most and not evryday too. In fact, give him playdough, thomas the train puzzle or a storybook and he will happily play with them. He spends his meal times completing 25 piece puzzle meant for 3 yr olds. At nite, b4 bedtime, he will ask me to read to him his ladybird fav bks like ‘gingerbread man’ and ‘enormous turnip’. In fact, he will interrupts me while I am telling him the story and continues it himself. Sometimes he adds his own details.
I became a SAHM by circumstances. Previously, I had ambitions of climbing the ‘career ladder’. I am an ex Lit/EL teacher in a top sch. Aft several unsustainable pregnancies, when I finally conceived, DH ‘ordered’ me to quit teaching. Yes, sacrifices had to be made, but I never looked back.
Yes, I miss teaching - the rush I get when faced with pupils with thought provoking and stimulating questions. Some of my peers have been promoted. In fact, many of them cannot understand how I could quit my job and stay at home. Whereas others think that I am a SAH ‘tai tai’. I am not. I am fully involved in running my home and bringing up my child, even though I have a helper. Also, now that I am a SAHM, I realize the benefits of it. My child is thriving. I do believe that had I continued working, I would not have been able to spend that much qlty time with my son. As it is, my hrs were 7am to 7pm daily, followed by marking at hm.
At the same time, I also do not disregard the fact that for some, being a SAHM is not an option. I understand and take my hats off to them for being able to do their best in juggling work and making an effort to spend time with their children. My mom was a SAHM, but I was a latch-key child. I spend my pri and sec aft sch years in sch or at hm alone. I do not remember her spending qlty time with me, actually she never did. She spent her days with her frds, meeting them for tea etc… -
[quote]
An incident happened last wkend when we were at a frd's place for dinner. They played a cartoon DVD for my 2+ yr old son. After about 10 mins, he wanted to do something else. My frds commented that he had a short attention span!!![/quote]Hi autumnbronze,
Actually those kids who can sit for hours in front of the TV, are the ones who will have short attention span when it comes to learning Those parents who force feed their kids with tons of \"educational TV\" are making a big mistake.
It's great that your son is not interested in TV and more interested to do other real things
Your son is very fortunate to have you stay at home to look after him. I think it is a luxury for kids to be taken care by their own mommies nowadays. -
Hi everyone,
I don't know about you guys... but for me quality time is everytime.
Here's how I try to make quality time:-
1) TV time - I try my best to watch TV with them. What they watch is what I will watch. Not the other way round. Sometimes we discuss about the program we are watching, negotiate what to watch, reasons for liking or disliking the program and stuff like that. I can also do my \"research\" as I am also teaching my little ones at work. They love it when I start talking about cartoons and stuff in class.
2) Size does matter - Some of you might be thinking... TV time? How to talk or bond? Well the talking I've mention already... Here's another thing I found out... The smaller the TV the closer we get. I don't have a Huge TV set (anymore). So we would sit closely. (Shiok-a-doodle-do!). Try it. Very cozy.... with popcorn... lagi cozier.
3) Take a bus - I dumped my MPV a couple of months ago. Now we take the public transport. Not only do I save money (that's the cheapo in me talking btw) and save mother earth (environmentalist), but I get to interact with them more compare to when I was driving them around, as I have to keep my eyes on the road. I found atleast 6 road games I can play with them... My favourite - \"I spy with my little eyes..\"
4) IT - You have to be careful with IT. There's this saying,\"We must be the master of IT... not the other way around.\" Sometimes we forget to remember, IT is a TOOL not a solution. So wield that tool properly. Misuse it and the consequences could be dire. I use IT for communication with my kids(MSN, emails), looking for information to put up in our blog, reading, singing and (yes) games. But at all times, these activities are fully supervised or the very least limited. (we use a reward system)
5) Play time - Do not rob your children of their childhood. I was a kampung boy living somewhere around Bt Timah. Used to go kite-flying, marble-playing, cycling, longkang-fishing(eels), top-spinning... I know times, they are a changing... that's for sure. Though I cannot do most of these stuff with my kids, I will talk about them and share my childhood with them. And guess what... now they can't stop asking and want to try it themselves...Anyone knows where I can fish for eels?(lol)
6) Meal time - A family that eats together, stays together. I love the concept of communal eating. Be it at home or outside. Eating is a joy that we sometimes forget to remember. And yes - put away other distractions during meal time, please...
7) Cooking - I loveeee to cook for/with my children. Our favourite dish is spaghetti. Its quick to cook, healthy and fun(esp. if the long ones) to eat. I would assign them tasks like setting the table, preparing the ingredients, tasting and other non-hazardous stuff.
8 ) Household chores - Who says housework is boring? Assign them some simple chores like making their beds, feeding the pet fish. Apart from instilling responsibility, it makes great conversation during meal time. Oh try not to enforce it... If possible make it like a game...
9) Teachable moments - Every moment with our children is precious. If we miss the moment, there is no rewind button. Don't talk TO them... Talk WITH them... even if it borders on nonsense. You will be surprise what you can learn from them.
10) 2 ears, 1 mouth - Why? So... listen more talk less. This is a lost art. I know I mentioned talking with them prior to this. But never discount listening to them. With children, especially, everyday is a new learning experience. Try it - who knows what you'll learn from them. I know I have... sometimes more than what I could ever \"teach\" them.
But this is just my 2 cents worth, of course :idea:
Regards
exTEACHER -
:celebrate: Cheers to Point 5!
I am a kampong girl (Kranji) who plays boy's games too. And I loved to tell my girl my stories of being a kampong girl. She loves it. The most recent mention was about play marbles with the boys. She wants to know the rules of the game and me to demo and play with her! Die! Hard to find marbles now that its not available at my nearest provision shop anymore...
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all.in.one:
maybe u can find it in aquarium shop... :?:celebrate: Cheers to Point 5!
I am a kampong girl (Kranji) who plays boy's games too. And I loved to tell my girl my stories of being a kampong girl. She loves it. The most recent mention was about play marbles with the boys. She wants to know the rules of the game and me to demo and play with her! Die! Hard to find marbles now that its not available at my nearest provision shop anymore... -
Ahhh while u at the aquarium…
Check if they have eels…
lol
exTEACHER
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