Worried parents taking children to psychologists
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toddles:
oh really? So it was something underlying over some years... I thought the common story was that she was gang-raped in London and something snapped thereafter. but ok... :offtopic:[/quote]It was my friend who told me about Grace Quek. Annabelle is already died. They were classmates in HC. Her fascination started the gang rape. I know, :offtopic:
I think Annabelle Cheong is a different. The main objection was her father as he was a hypocrite. He was very strict with her, and she was a top scholar. He was proper and upright outside but at home, he would watch porn. I think quite different leh...2ppaamm:
[quote=\"vicki\"]
The infamous 'Annabelle Cheong' comes to mind when u mention the abv! -
michyms:
How far up the ladder can a parent go? All throughout the primary level? Already I am reading that a graduate parent could not even do a P4 Maths question. Or we are using a completely different methodoloy from what the school/PSLE wants. That's why my last comment \"If this is indeed a doable alternative...\".DesertWind:
I am beginning to think it is a good idea actually to escape the system and do home-schooling instead. Home-schooling used to be such an alien concept to me but given the current SG schooling environment, those who can't catch up risk getting \"labeled\" by psychologist. Now I can understand why some would choose to escape all the \"hype\" and \"noise\" of the school environment and do home-schooling. If this is indeed a doable alternative....
This is indeed a good option, to allow the kid to learn at his/her own pace. The only issue is that they still have to face the dreaded PSLE exams at the end of the day, but at least allows the parent the time and flexibility in choosing a method and pace to prepare the kid for it. It takes a dedicated and patient parent to be able to do it. -
Chenonceau:
i have great comfort to hear about ways i can help my son. As for spit, are you referring to ka pui(saliva)? i think with all your methods above, think the beany thingy more suitable and using a stick to write on sand except that must go and find sand first
I completely understand how you feel. My son's Chinese is awful. When I read what other children can write, I stress. Then I told him. I don't care what other kids can do. You and I, we are gonna do the best we can. Then we started Potato Chinese http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/content/learning-chinese-potato-way. Every little chunk memorized was an excuse for a jig. I tell my son that his Chinese sucks. It ain't his fault. It's mine 'cos I am a potato and he is a potato's son. My shoulders are broad and wide. I can shoulder the blame for his failings for a while still. Then I tell him that he has to overcome my failings and make it good on his own. And my son will try... and try... and try until 10pm at night when I have to force him to stop. He will wanna try on Sundays and I have to forbid it.larkspur:
i must admit it has come to a point where i will yell at him and screamed at him :stompfeet: , it will make him so fearful of holding a pencil. It comes to a point whereby i know i cannot continue to teach him and my hubby has to take over. My hubby is quite kancheong but at least he can start off well with my son and i have to learn along side with my hubby on how to encourgage him.
My teachers at childcare told me to let my son do some simple housework like picking up toys, keeping books and playing with dough but does not help much. i never agrue with the teachers but imagine how depressing it is when my girl comes home and tells me that (last year my girl still in childcare during dec )her brother is the only one who cannot write and his classmates can. So i have 3 people telling me about my son: my girl, the chinese teacher and the english teacher.Maybe i think it would be good for me to get him checked up at least if i know he might need help and have to learn to be patient with him.
Nothing that's worth doing is easy. Help him be persistent by being very encouraging... and in the process your bond with him will strengthen.
Break down your expectations. It'll be easier for you to be happy for your son. Being happy for your son will encourage him. If writing is a problem, then work first on alphabet recognition. Sit on the floor where there are square floor tiles. Get a jar of broad beans or pebbles. Get him to form letters in the squares by lining up the beans. Praise him and tell him he's so very smart... and that other children can only write, but he can write with BEANS. Give him a sense of pride. This will motivate him. Do silly things like try and spit on a trail of ants so that they form a letter \"a\" or \"b\" or \"c\". We did that... the most difficult thing was to find enough spit.
After that, give him a big stick to write in the sand... or a big piece of mahjong paper and a paintbrush. One piece mahjong paper... one letter. Can write is can write what... who cares what you write with and who cares how big you write. Once he has developed some comfort and has enough giggling about writing then his muscle control may have developed enough to hold a pencil? Oh... you can also write on each other. Offer your stomach or your back. Write on HIS stomach and his back. Use soap lather to form letters on each others' bodies (but of course, only if you bathe with him lah... if you're not that sort then don't do this).
Your son is special. Every weakness is special. My son is a gong-gong. But I love his gong-gongness and I tell that that is what makes him special. Make your child feel special and he will expend every effort to stay special in your eyes.
It's easier for another parent to say all these... I am not in your situation. You know your situation best, however. I'm just being kaypoh into something I know little about. Forgive.
but i guess i will still send him for assessment first since with a referral letter from polyclinic to go for assessment in KKH is still cheaper.
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2ppaamm:
It was my friend who told me about Grace Quek. Annabelle is already died. They were classmates in HC. Her fascination started the gang rape. I know, :offtopic:
yeah... i know various ppl who knew her too. principal chased her and her filming team off the school grounds when they came. we were in an LT and the guys were like, whoa, guess who's here! -
DesertWind:
I find this do-able, because after about Grade 6, the children just study themselves. Syllables from other countries are not so :siao: , and if you do all the way, the kid still can go to universities like everyone else. At the university, everyone is back to their senses. Whether you are from Singapore or any other countries makes no difference. Everyone starts from the same ground. So another reason why I do not understand this mad race. Our children largi bored in the uni. :imconstipated:
How far up the ladder can a parent go? All throughout the primary level? Already I am reading that a graduate parent could not even do a P4 Maths question. Or we are using a completely different methodoloy from what the school/PSLE wants. That's why my last comment \"If this is indeed a doable alternative...\".michyms:
This is indeed a good option, to allow the kid to learn at his/her own pace. The only issue is that they still have to face the dreaded PSLE exams at the end of the day, but at least allows the parent the time and flexibility in choosing a method and pace to prepare the kid for it. It takes a dedicated and patient parent to be able to do it. -
ksi:
I completely agree with Chenon, I always tell my child most people pull the ear directly with their hand on the same side but there is no stopping her to pull the ear on the opposite with the same hand. Yes it takes a longer way but she will still achieve the same thing, pull ear. My child does not write early and does not write well. If I can find the old stuff she has written in the past and her current handwriting now...you will see that there is hope. So please continue to have hope for your child and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.[/quote]Ok... this is a VERY embarrassing admission but I'll share it anyway so that it may encourage Larkspur. In end-P3, DS' Teacher told me this story.
That is so cute!! Like he has superhero powers.toddles:
[quote=\"Chenonceau\"]Break down your expectations. It'll be easier for you to be happy for your son. Being happy for your son will encourage him. If writing is a problem, then work first on alphabet recognition. Sit on the floor where there are square floor tiles. Get a jar of broad beans or pebbles. Get him to form letters in the squares by lining up the beans. Praise him and tell him he's so very smart... and that other children can only write, but he can write with BEANS. Give him a sense of pride. This will motivate him. Do silly things like try and spit on a trail of ants so that they form a letter \"a\".
All us Teachers were having a calibration meeting to try and standardize our marking. The other Teachers were complaining about bad handwriting. I said \"WAIT!\"... then I went to my computer and downloaded the photo I took of your son's script, and I flashed it on the projector screen. All the Teachers took one look and no one else dared to complain about their own students anymore.
So you see... Larkspur, you ain't alone. -
2ppaamm:
BANG BANG!toddles:
OH MY! I have a Masters degree (numbers related) and I have absolutely no clue what a number bond is. Shoot me now. :faint:
:rotflmao:
toddles, if your dd is still there (at the same preschool) i betcha she's gonna teach you soon. Then sure you'd master it.
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I think parents in Singapore are generally more kan cheong than our counter parts overseas. 10 years ago, a child going to the psychologists are almost unheard of and those who go were genuine cases.
Nobody cares when my dd cant even read or write a single word when she was 4 years old!! When she went "bang" and started reading at 5 yrs old, her classmates were worse, no one cares too. My dd is in GEP when she came back to Singapore. Given her situation and if we were in Singapore when she was 3 or 4, i think the teacher would have asked me to bring her to the psychologists and that she has learning disability!! -
larkspur:
Yes... send him if you want... but dun tell him until you really need to.
i have great comfort to hear about ways i can help my son. As for spit, are you referring to ka pui(saliva)? i think with all your methods above, think the beany thingy more suitable and using a stick to write on sand except that must go and find sand first but i guess i will still send him for assessment first since with a referral letter from polyclinic to go for assessment in KKH is still cheaper.
Yeaaaaaaahhhh... :oops: :oops: :oops: I did mean ka pui (saliva). It's very easy to do. Put out some food, and when ants come, you spit all over to get them to form letters. Of course, they're very untidy letters... and that gives you the excuse to tell your son that the ants write very badly. :rotflmao:
I think I should stop sharing the more risque stuff, else someone here will ask ME to go for an assessment. -
Chenonceau:
Thanks Chenonceau. Thanks for the encouragement. I will continue to work on my son's writing.When i get discouraged and frustrated, i will think of the story above and move on. i guess i have to keep telling myself my son is only 5 years old,still have time to work on itOk... this is a VERY embarrassing admission but I'll share it anyway so that it may encourage Larkspur. In end-P3, DS' Teacher told me this story.
All us Teachers were having a calibration meeting to try and standardize our marking. The other Teachers were complaining about bad handwriting. I said \"WAIT!\"... then I went to my computer and downloaded the photo I took of your son's script, and I flashed it on the projector screen. All the Teachers took one look and no one else dared to complain about their own students anymore.
So you see... Larkspur, you ain't alone.
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