Worried parents taking children to psychologists

[toddles]

2ppaamm:

It was my friend who told me about Grace Quek. Annabelle is already died. They were classmates in HC. Her fascination started the gang rape. I know, :offtopic:

yeah... i know various ppl who knew her too. principal chased her and her filming team off the school grounds when they came. we were in an LT and the guys were like, whoa, guess who's here!

[2ppaamm]

DesertWind:

michyms:

This is indeed a good option, to allow the kid to learn at his/her own pace. The only issue is that they still have to face the dreaded PSLE exams at the end of the day, but at least allows the parent the time and flexibility in choosing a method and pace to prepare the kid for it. It takes a dedicated and patient parent to be able to do it.

How far up the ladder can a parent go? All throughout the primary level? Already I am reading that a graduate parent could not even do a P4 Maths question. Or we are using a completely different methodoloy from what the school/PSLE wants. That's why my last comment \"If this is indeed a doable alternative...\".

I find this do-able, because after about Grade 6, the children just study themselves. Syllables from other countries are not so :siao: , and if you do all the way, the kid still can go to universities like everyone else. At the university, everyone is back to their senses. Whether you are from Singapore or any other countries makes no difference. Everyone starts from the same ground. So another reason why I do not understand this mad race. Our children largi bored in the uni. :imconstipated:

[Chenonceau]

ksi:

toddles:

[quote=\"Chenonceau\"]Break down your expectations. It'll be easier for you to be happy for your son. Being happy for your son will encourage him. If writing is a problem, then work first on alphabet recognition. Sit on the floor where there are square floor tiles. Get a jar of broad beans or pebbles. Get him to form letters in the squares by lining up the beans. Praise him and tell him he's so very smart... and that other children can only write, but he can write with BEANS. Give him a sense of pride. This will motivate him. Do silly things like try and spit on a trail of ants so that they form a letter \"a\".

That is so cute!! Like he has superhero powers.

I completely agree with Chenon, I always tell my child most people pull the ear directly with their hand on the same side but there is no stopping her to pull the ear on the opposite with the same hand. Yes it takes a longer way but she will still achieve the same thing, pull ear. My child does not write early and does not write well. If I can find the old stuff she has written in the past and her current handwriting now...you will see that there is hope. So please continue to have hope for your child and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.[/quote]Ok... this is a VERY embarrassing admission but I'll share it anyway so that it may encourage Larkspur. In end-P3, DS' Teacher told me this story.

All us Teachers were having a calibration meeting to try and standardize our marking. The other Teachers were complaining about bad handwriting. I said \"WAIT!\"... then I went to my computer and downloaded the photo I took of your son's script, and I flashed it on the projector screen. All the Teachers took one look and no one else dared to complain about their own students anymore.

So you see... Larkspur, you ain't alone.

[buds]

2ppaamm:

toddles:

OH MY! I have a Masters degree (numbers related) and I have absolutely no clue what a number bond is. Shoot me now. :faint:

BANG BANG!

:rotflmao:

toddles, if your dd is still there (at the same preschool) i betcha she's gonna teach you soon. Then sure you'd master it.

[Lynn2010]

I think parents in Singapore are generally more kan cheong than our counter parts overseas. 10 years ago, a child going to the psychologists are almost unheard of and those who go were genuine cases.


Nobody cares when my dd cant even read or write a single word when she was 4 years old!! When she went "bang" and started reading at 5 yrs old, her classmates were worse, no one cares too. My dd is in GEP when she came back to Singapore. Given her situation and if we were in Singapore when she was 3 or 4, i think the teacher would have asked me to bring her to the psychologists and that she has learning disability!!

[Chenonceau]

larkspur:

i have great comfort to hear about ways i can help my son. As for spit, are you referring to ka pui(saliva)? i think with all your methods above, think the beany thingy more suitable and using a stick to write on sand except that must go and find sand first but i guess i will still send him for assessment first since with a referral letter from polyclinic to go for assessment in KKH is still cheaper.

Yes... send him if you want... but dun tell him until you really need to.

Yeaaaaaaahhhh... :oops: :oops: :oops: I did mean ka pui (saliva). It's very easy to do. Put out some food, and when ants come, you spit all over to get them to form letters. Of course, they're very untidy letters... and that gives you the excuse to tell your son that the ants write very badly. :rotflmao:

I think I should stop sharing the more risque stuff, else someone here will ask ME to go for an assessment.

[larkspur]

Chenonceau:

Ok... this is a VERY embarrassing admission but I'll share it anyway so that it may encourage Larkspur. In end-P3, DS' Teacher told me this story.


All us Teachers were having a calibration meeting to try and standardize our marking. The other Teachers were complaining about bad handwriting. I said \"WAIT!\"... then I went to my computer and downloaded the photo I took of your son's script, and I flashed it on the projector screen. All the Teachers took one look and no one else dared to complain about their own students anymore.

So you see... Larkspur, you ain't alone.

Thanks Chenonceau. Thanks for the encouragement. I will continue to work on my son's writing.When i get discouraged and frustrated, i will think of the story above and move on. i guess i have to keep telling myself my son is only 5 years old,still have time to work on it

[DesertWind]

2ppaamm:

.....And when school (note: not teachers) meet the slightest difficulty, even things that is in their jurisdiction, they just pass problems back to us, and as if they are psychologists, they will help to label and justify why their labeling is right based upon their own observation. (The teacher told me my son is ADHD :siao: ) she insisted I send my son for tests. 3 psychological tests and $10,000 :moneyflies: , she is wrong. Not their money so easier to spend is it. If you resist sending the kids to psychologists, you get labelled 'lousy mother', and when the intervention classes are not available for kids like yours, you are not doing anything to help your kid.


Yep, easier to homeschool. Much easier. Like my 12-year-old said, just do my work lor, don't understand what the problem is in school. Socially, just bring for sports, can still make friends. Can also learn social skills at home with so many kids. Also bring him to work, so that he can mingle with academics. No need to worry about that PSLE, that \"your son this, your son that...\" Yep, I'm an educator too. But I cannot see eye-to-eye with many out there. So sorry. Not every educator is the same. In my world, I believe in putting students first. My students need not be the only ones benefiting from that. My kids can enjoy that too.

It is freaking me out to tell you that I am beginning to understand your posts. :scared: I am beginning to have such encounters and my boy is only 4 yo!

What do we want? Struggle with the system and/or get the kid labeled (for what? ) OR Must really think out of the box, how to train the kid up for a VOCATION? Train him to earn a living to be able to take care of himself for life?

I am thinking back on those institutions like VI (vocational institute) and such....

[larkspur]

Chenonceau:

larkspur:

i have great comfort to hear about ways i can help my son. As for spit, are you referring to ka pui(saliva)? i think with all your methods above, think the beany thingy more suitable and using a stick to write on sand except that must go and find sand first but i guess i will still send him for assessment first since with a referral letter from polyclinic to go for assessment in KKH is still cheaper.

Yes... send him if you want... but dun tell him until you really need to.

Yeaaaaaaahhhh... :oops: :oops: :oops: I did mean ka pui (saliva). It's very easy to do. Put out some food, and when ants come, you spit all over to get them to form letters. Of course, they're very untidy letters... and that gives you the excuse to tell your son that the ants write very badly. :rotflmao:

I think I should stop sharing the more risque stuff, else someone here will ask ME to go for an assessment.

:rotflmao: it is so funny and you really have a series of ideas, extraordinary kind. maybe i should try all the ways, even though some may not help but at least will ease the tensions and stress my son has .Yes i must admit he is stressed about his writing. As for his assements at KKH , i dunno how much he know cos i discussed it with my hubby and sometimes when my mother in law around, she keeps saying dun need to go , maybe he just dun practice enough but i am not the kind to sweep dirt under the carpets, i prefer to know the truth and work on it

[buds]

insider:

A sensible parent with a 'normal' child will know how to smile at others when the latter comment about his/her child being 'slow', 'not up to par', etc, with a 'never mind' heart instead of taking such comments harshly.


Such parent may even laugh at difficult exam together with the child after the child fails it.

With this mentality, then everything also can be a 'no issues'. The moment one cannot accept such 'well intentioned but ill comment/method', then the child will start to have more troubles coming his/her way.

I support psychological testings if the needs are genuine. Learning disabilities should be identified during preschool years or else it maybe more difficult to reverse when the child enters P1. To me, the burden / guilt of a child not being identified in his preschool mostly lies with his preschool teacher if she really fails to identify it after at least 6 months with a child (this kind of teacher 'eat waste rice').

Yes. All true.

insider:

I believe Funz and I and many other preschools are getting to see more and more preschoolers with learning disabilities and as long as the preschool that a child is in is not the 'academic' type, then if the teacher proposes a professional assessment, the need is likely to be a genuine one. If child is in an academic preschool, then parents may have to rethink about such need since in most academic-driven preschools, they hardly could see a child anything further than whether can read or master timetables... (that's why academic-driven preschools are overall harmful to 'slower' young children who can anytime get 'labeled').

During my time oredi got a handful in almost every class... not just recently. The problem is, some parents are in denial that even when their child literally displays all the symptoms.

I had a boy come in for supposed enrichment pgrm once and i really cudn teach him because he clearly had autism. My superiors called parents and they denied vehemently and was of course upset and called our ctr names and such. It is only when management decided to ask the child to leave as the other normal children were very affected by his extreme behavioral issues, the parents came clean abt his autism and produced report. He was already in special school and had partial home support from a professional who comes twice weekly but the parents admitted that they just wanted to chuck him some place and by that they mean any place tt was willing to take him... cos they were sick of him at home and driving all their maids away. Tt was why they didn't declare.

Parents do know their children huh?