How do you maintain your relationship with your spouse?

[Winnie Yong]

Intimacy I feel, is really key to a marriage

[kiddo]

Winnie Yong:

Intimacy I feel, is really key to a marriage

That why the last verse is
\"Till death do we part\"

[babli]

Hi


Just want to know what to do as somethinodd is heppeing in my marrige.my story a bit shoking…I am 38 years old and my DH is 40. we have sax relationship in 6months or 1 year and that was also forced from my side. he is very closed to my daughters and won’t give a single cent from last 2 years to me. giving different excuses as used daughters FD money or invested in property. continue sending all money to in laws (hiding with me). Over religious…always in cold war in mood even i tried
to talk to him in problem solving mood but always in threating mood.
most of the time traveling…some time he is normal but he don’t wan’t spend on holidays, food, childeren tution so again cold war started. he is always in win win position as he clearly stated he doesn’t need me.I have 2 daughters and i want willing to my marrige. his condinion is follow whatever is he wants…i don’t know what to do…

[3Boys]

babli:

Hi


Just want to know what to do as somethinodd is heppeing in my marrige.my story a bit shoking..I am 38 years old and my DH is 40. we have sax relationship in 6months or 1 year and that was also forced from my side. he is very closed to my daughters and won't give a single cent from last 2 years to me. giving different excuses as used daughters FD money or invested in property. continue sending all money to in laws (hiding with me). Over religious...always in cold war in mood even i tried
to talk to him in problem solving mood but always in threating mood.
most of the time traveling..some time he is normal but he don't wan't spend on holidays, food, childeren tution so again cold war started. he is always in win win position as he clearly stated he doesn't need me.I have 2 daughters and i want willing to my marrige. his condinion is follow whatever is he wants...i don't know what to do...

Sounds like a very unsustainable situation. You are entitled to happiness in a marriage, I think you need to put your foot down and insist on some marriage counselling, to get your point across. And as a homemaker (are you?), you are entitled to share of the assets, he has no right to shunt unreasonable amounts to his parents.

Be strong and stand your ground.

[babli]

Marrige concellinging will only work if the other party also willing to get solution and take honest approch.He always blaming and lieing to put me down. For me difficult to win the arguments as he is very clever in communication.

We have 2 assests first one is fully paid which is under his name, second on is loanded which is shared. when i spoke him to put first one as joint name as i have 2 daughters and i also need a roof then he threat that he will surrender the second one to bank as the loan is under only his name…and left the singapore(i.e.meants stay alone with daughters)

[3Boys]

babli:

Marrige concellinging will only work if the other party also willing to get solution and take honest approch.He always blaming and lieing to put me down. For me difficult to win the arguments as he is very clever in communication.

We have 2 assests first one is fully paid which is under his name, second on is loanded which is shared. when i spoke him to put first one as joint name as i have 2 daughters and i also need a roof then he threat that he will surrender the second one to bank as the loan is under only his name..and left the singapore(i.e.meants stay alone with daughters)

That's really disgusting. He has no respect for you whatsoever. As a husband, he has an obligation to the wife and children, this type of self-centred behaviour has no place in a marriage. He is threatening your security as opposed to providing it. Ask him if he is living up to his responsibilities as a husband and father.

I don't want to end up being a catalyst for any sort of issues that may surface in the future, but I think you need to put your foot down.

[nlimm]

Augmum:

wishababy:

it takes 2 hands to clap when comes to sustaining the r/s.

I wish my DH would do something too, but he is simply too bo-chap.

oh yes.....it definitely takes 2 hands to clap....
in a marriage/relationship , lots of give and take,
not easy for Mars and Venus to live together under the same roof.......

Totally agreed!!! When it comes to children issues worse.

[1amber]

3Boys:

babli:

Marrige concellinging will only work if the other party also willing to get solution and take honest approch.He always blaming and lieing to put me down. For me difficult to win the arguments as he is very clever in communication.

We have 2 assests first one is fully paid which is under his name, second on is loanded which is shared. when i spoke him to put first one as joint name as i have 2 daughters and i also need a roof then he threat that he will surrender the second one to bank as the loan is under only his name..and left the singapore(i.e.meants stay alone with daughters)

That's really disgusting. He has no respect for you whatsoever. As a husband, he has an obligation to the wife and children, this type of self-centred behaviour has no place in a marriage. He is threatening your security as opposed to providing it. Ask him if he is living up to his responsibilities as a husband and father.

I don't want to end up being a catalyst for any sort of issues that may surface in the future, but I think you need to put your foot down.

I second that. Put your foot down and don't retreat. Take care.

[marvic]

Think of your happy moments together, time when you both did silly things for each other, etc… Once in a while, tell your spouse you miss/love him/her (with sincerity please)…how many people actually do that at least once a week?

[babana]

Hi,


Try to start with dating. Weekly dating will let both of you relive those dating days…and slowly but surely, you will find that the lovely dovely feeling back…

Hope it helps!