Principal of top school under investigation for hiring prost
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limlim:
I strongly suspect your spouse would be in similar salary scale as you, if not higher, for you to be willing to make that decision..Imami:
Agree. That's why I made a career switch two years ago. I could have been a financial controller if I had stayed on that job but I decided to become a clerk in order to be a part of my child's growing up years. I reckon the furthest I could have gone is being a CFO or a something and I probably could have earned a million before I am 40. But nothing can buy my child's growing up years back, even if I give up my million(s).
If you're the sole potential million earner.. you might have made a different decision.. am I right? :evil: well.. I could be wrong..
Yes, you are right. Simply because my hubby is financially stable and more capable than me, I have that choice which I exercised. But having said that, I have friends in similar pay scale as me who choose not to make the choose despite their husbands are earning equally much. Ok, I don't know how much those husbands earn but these friends live in properties with gardens and drive high end continental cars. I live in a hdb unit and the family car is a non-descript Japan car.
And again, you are right-my choice would have been different if I am the sole million earner of the family. But I would have done everything I can in order to perform my duty as a mother. -
Chenonceau:
Read ur link but couldn't connect d dots with d posts u replied to.
Teehee! Teehee! Teehee! http://petunialee.blogspot.com/2010/01/testosterone-deformed.html
Men r fr Mars n women r fr Venus? -
Chenonceau:
Yes, but the point is we have done all we can given the resources available. For me-it's a person's (my child) life that is at stake and he has no means to help himself. I brought him to this world, now shdnt I be responsible for him? To care for, to nurture, to equip, to provide a chance to excel in life for him?
We try our best, but we could still fail.
I have been a clerk for two years now. My peers have moved up the corporate ladder. Do I regret my decision? Not yet.... I can still be a CFO if my employer agrees to change my designation to \"clerk-finance operations\" and I can still work towards my million... Just that the million is in rmb, not sgd only mah... -
3Boys:
d minor sex laws r archaic n heavily skewed against males,
That is certainly my view and my DW view at this time. The environment and law is stacked against them.
At 17, some of our boys will be enrolled into NS. They will hold a rifle, if there is a war, they may have to kill people. If they desert, they get charged for treason. Any mitigation for them on the basis of 'poor' home background? Man up, as they say, face the consequences.
Just read the article on the girl who called the NSF who died in training 'weak'. I am the strongest advocate that my boys carry the responsibility for national defence, keep the country safe for the themselves and the womenfolk, but I tell you I am beginning to wonder.
but there r provisions for some flexibility in its application.
Dis is an interesting read:
http://www.singaporelawreview.org/2010/02/romeo-knew-juliet-was-a-minor-but%E2%80%A6/ -
Way2GO:
No... men are adorable because they are aggressive, risk-taking, fierce. Just don't expect women to be... and don't diss us when we are not (and when we want you to be gentle).
Read ur link but couldn't connect d dots with d posts u replied to.Chenonceau:
Teehee! Teehee! Teehee! http://petunialee.blogspot.com/2010/01/testosterone-deformed.html
Men r fr Mars n women r fr Venus?
I love my 2 men. They look after me very well. They get mad when I get sad. When The Husband disciplines, the children NEVER repeat the act. But I don't want my husband to discipline too often. -
Chenonceau:
Bravo Chenon for ur effort. :celebrate:
This is my view too. I actually wrote in to MCYS when they were updating the Women's Charter, but well... they just went ahead and made the Women's Charter even MORE biased. They don't listen very well.
Is d Women's Charter still relevant in today's context? -
limlim:
But for a humane society, I feel that justice has always to be tempered with mercy. People must have hope, to know that if they want to change, they will be shown the grace to be allowed to change. Sin, or wrongdoing, if people are comfortable with a word with some religious connotations, always has its own consequences. If I had not been shown mercy by others for the many STUPID things I have done in my youth and even as an adult, I probably wouldn't be here now. I would have just sunk into depression or become suicidal. Let the girl have a chance to face the music and then change for the better. I didn't guarantee that she will change; I just said that she needs to be given the chance to do so.
Wow.. a prefect reply.....hokkiengirl:
Humans have a natural instinct for justice to be served.
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fightingmom:
Can poke. :evil:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:Nebbermind:
lucky women can anyhow poke...we guys will get into alot more trouble!! :evil:
Just not the underage ones. :politebleah: -
2 people have PM-ed me to ask How To Ensure Proper Sexual Imprinting I won't say I am an expert, and I don't guarantee that my way will work, because I just kinda humtum my way through... and prayed a lot.
This is what I did.
Ages 2.5 to 8 Years
(1) Taught skills to ward off sexual predators JUST IN CASE I was not there to protect. Taught vocab \"You pervert!!\". Taught physical resistance - bite, kick, whack, run, scream, scratch. I role played with my kids possible attacks and scenarios.
(2) Made clear the parts of the body that are off limits to touching by others. Named these parts of the body. Taught the child that he/she has complete and sovereign will over his/her body (because Mommy says so... and Mommy is Boss right?). Taught that she has a right to tell ANYONE (including her Mom and Dad) that she does not want to be touched, held or cuddled. I enforced this rule to the point where I scolded my younger one when he kept touching his older sister's arm just to irritate her. If she does not want to be touched, she does not want to be touched. She is boss of her own body.
(3) Watched them carefully to make sure they didn't EVER have to use the skills I taught them. In Sec 1, I drove my DD to her friend's house for a project. Only the father was home. I excused us and said I would come back with DD later. Better safe, than sorry.
Age 8 Years to 9 Years
(4) First, I borrowed books that explained the sex act.
(5) Then, I borrowed those that talked about teenage abortions... with pictures... we watched movies with that theme... we watched one particular movie where a boy (a top student) had to forego his place in uni because he had to marry the girl he had made pregnant... and how life was very different for his friend, and average student, many years later. We looked into abortions, venereal diseases. Both my kids read and did up reports on the ugly medical truths of abortion and VD. It completely grosses them out and the message gets in and stays in because at that age, they don't have any hormonal issues. It's all very intellectual and factual at that age.
Age 9 Years to 13 Years
(1) Let the above knowledge steep in their brains.
(2) Was prepared to answer questions, if they did ask.
(3) Keep comms lines open. Lectured less. Listened more. Trusted that my message had gotten in and was in incubation somewhere in their psyches. Showed trust, even as I did secret checks.
Age 13 Years to 15 Years
I proposed practicum for every single vice I was afraid of.
(1) Alcohol: We had dinner at Paulaner Brauhaus and I fed her beer. She took 2 sips and decided it didn't taste good. Then I myself got drunk (didn't wanna waste expensive beer mah)... laughed... giggled... cried tears... passed out. The next morning she told me \"Women are undignified when they get drunk.\" Yay! Lesson learnt! At the expense of Mom's dignity. :oops:
(2) Pubbing A: We hung out at Clarke Quay and observed the queues into the Ministry of Music. I promised her that if she wanted to go pubbing, she could but I wanted her to look out for dangers.
(3) Pubbing B: For our field trip into the dangers of pubbing, we went to Harry's. Sat down and listened to live music. Watched the people at the bar. I pointed out male-female courting behaviors. I pointed out when a man could spike a drink. I explained that when I was 18 (living in France), someone DID spike my drink... except that I SAW him do it, got me a cab and went home without telling anyone. I never went out with that group again. I explained that part of staying safe was to hang out with boys she trusted NOT to hurt her. I hoped that the teaching I gave her at 9 about trustworthy, reliable men/boys would kick in. I had no way to tell. So I prayed.
(3) I never preached. I didn't say it was wrong... that God didn't like it. It's no use. Teenagers are programmed to break rules. So you dun wanna present these as rules. I just showed her all the end states of certain start points. Drink at a bar. Get drunk. Pass out. Get raped without you knowing.
(4) I helped her walk through the dark spots around our neighbourhood, and develop plans of action on how to cope with attacks. What she should do? How to protect herself? I showed her an article about a 19 year old who just disappeared. As she became sensitized to these dangers, she chose herself to come home early (by about 11pm)... and to make sure to arrange for us to escort her home past the dark paths... OR ensure her boyfriend brings her home.
(5) Get to know the boys she talks about. Become their mentor too.
(6) Most importantly (and this has nothing to do with me), God gave her a group of goody-2-shoes friends to hang out with.
I cannot guarantee that this will work. Just sharing my story. -
hokkiengirl:
But for a humane society, I feel that justice has always to be tempered with mercy. People must have hope, to know that if they want to change, they will be shown the grace to be allowed to change. Sin, or wrongdoing, if people are comfortable with a word with some religious connotations, always has its own consequences. If I had not been shown mercy by others for the many STUPID things I have done in my youth and even as an adult, I probably wouldn't be here now. I would have just sunk into depression or become suicidal. Let the girl have a chance to face the music and thenchange for the better. I didn't guarantee that she will change; I justsaidthat she needs to be given the chance to do so.[/quote]Well, since she is not guilty of a capital offense, she is free is continue living her life as she desires once this brouhaha blows over, right. So that she will be given a second chance is a given, isn't it?
Wow.. a prefect reply.....limlim:
[quote=\"hokkiengirl\"]Humans have a natural instinct for justice to be served.
Will she have to face consequences? Probably
Will she have a chance to return to so society? Most certainly
Is she deserving of any understanding and sympathy? Well, that's where we differ, isn't it?
In my view, no. That's the crux of it.
Although it may not have been explicit, there is an undertone (to me at least), that those who do not express sympathy for this poor girl is a brute in need of a heart transplant. It is irrelevant whether she receives sanction or not, for surely she will.
So again, I have no sympathy for this girl. I don't buy the sweet 17 charade. I do not impose this view on any one, and I'd appreciate that one is not painted as being a monster for holding that view or be lobbied to change one's mind. She will be rehabbed, she will be polished up and reintroduced to society eventually, and she will go about her way in the future, whatever that may be. These are givens. I don't argue with these because it is pointless and irrelevant what I feel about them. But no sympathy.....
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