All About Autism
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Hi nugget, mummies,
Are your boys sensitive to "special-needs talk" in front of them?
Recently we had an OT come to our house to do OT but I have since realized that my boy does not like this OT because he kept talking special needs language. For eg. he will use words like "meltdowns" and he will advise us to consider special schools etc…my hubby finds it very depressing to talk to him!
I realized to my horror that my boy, although he has not much speech, can actually understand what we were talking about! That’s why he was acting up, disrupting our conversation by whining loudly and tried his best to disrupt our conversations!
Just now, I asked my hubby to play that youtube recording of this 6 yo autistic boy playing on the piano the song by Billy Joel that has gone viral. The next thing I know my boy was very upset and tried to interrupt the player! My hubby stopped it immediately and told me he does not like it.
My boy very sensitive. I don’t think he is stupid or autistic at all despite his speech-delay! -
Desert wind
I've openly talked about his condition with my hb when he is around. I think he understood but he didn't say anything. He just went with the flow. U bring me here, I go lor, u bring me there, I go there lor.
His OT is so much fun he loves it! Coz it's in a gym with lots of swings, giant balls, slide and toys!
it's definitely no 4 walls. I think it's the attitude of the parents that will determine how well their kids turn out. Whether NT or special needs kids. It doesn't matter what they are born with.
I'm glad to meet like minded parents here who takes an active role in parenting their special needs kids, helping them growing stronger each day. All of them face the same challenges in sch, playground or anywhere. There are bullies everywhere. If we are going to keep thinking 'oh my poor baby, BECOZ he is autistic, that's why he got bullied', we are not building a stronger child and it's plain self pity. My NT kid faced the same challenges as well, so I don't see what is so special about being bullied in the playground. Glad that many of us don't think this way and instead, help deal with the challenges that come our way actively, seeking solutions rather than whining.
Jia you, all supportive parents who love their kids and will walk the fire with them! -
You are one strong and protective mummy, mashy!
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Dersertwind , thanks
Desertwind , did u watch the 60 mins about iPad for ASD ? One therapist tot 1 child has the iq or language of 2yo until he realized he was wrong when introduce iPad for the child then most of the items the ASD are able to recognize n touch when ask to touch the item name…
So u know what I mean … They may know more things then what we think they are unable just that they duno how to make know to us… -
Mashy , I’m a starter la . It’s 2months now since we know about this ASD…
Oh man!!
At least u hav NT kid… I duno will I ever have one -
DesertWind,
I think my son is aware that he is different but he didn't show if he mind or doesn't mind. I think he doesn't care what people think of him. We did tell him before he is different from other kids and its okay we will deal with it together. We tell him that we love him everyday and ask if he love us too and he will reply yes.
Sometimes he will purposely fuss or give us a hard time. After he cool down, he will always apologize when we asked him to. We make him realized that if he is upset or unhappy, he need to tell us what is wrong and NOT by acting out because we can't guess what is wrong with him.
I think when the therapist tell me about my son maybe better off going to special needs school, it affects me more than my son :gloomy: :gloomy: -
last time i rang up Pathlight school before.
i asked "may i know what’s the difference between Pathlight and other Mainstream primary schools ?"
their reply: at Pathlight, we don’t do mother tongue. But the rest of the other subjects, all same ! -
Helplessmum
I only confirmed it in Jan this year. Starter? It’s all about acceptance and moving on. I’ve accepted it and will just deal with it. With or without the label, I still treats him the same way. No special treatment, so special leeway. It only helps me understand why he does certain things, that’s all. All kids have strengths and weaknesses. Just happened that his weaknesses labelled him as autistic.
Well, u only have one kid so u can’t tell if u will have an NT kid for a second one. Seriously I wouldn’t even encourage u to have a second one. When u first started posting, I encouraged u to have a second one because my second one brought my first out of his shell and I see the benefit. But for u, I’m not so sure. Even if your second one is NT, I’m not sure if u know how to deal with him/her. U already said u don’t talk much to your first and u are afraid he became like this because of u. I’m beginning to see some sense in what u said because other than all the negativity, ive not read of u positively hanging out with your son. I’m afraid u may bring more harm than good to your second kid if you continue with this kind of attitude.
I’ve decided long ago not to comfort u because u like to wallow in self pity. U blame your kid for what he is. Like what nugget said, u are the problem. Not him. I think he is perfectly fine. He faces many challenges everyday and yet u are not there for him. U refused to accept the psychologist’s report and just complain and complain but don’t do anything to deal with the issues. U refuse to read up because u said its too complex.
U know, we supportive parents think of strategies everyday to cope. How to deal with meltdowns, how to deal with OCD, how to make him talk properly. When we go for speech therapy, we have to practise what we learned everyday. We don’t go there to look at walls. If he need that extra help, then just do it. Everybody also wish to have a kid who will simply grow up by themselves without u having to lift a single finger. But the fact is, it’s not. U may see other pp having such an easy time with their kids, but u don’t see the effort behind it. How long they took to teach their kid to speak politely, how many times they drag them out of the playground becoz they couldn’t behave. It took many tries and lots of effort to get there. The children don’t simply learn just by u saying one time. As far as I see, u have not put in even half of the effort of parents with NT kids. U just expect him to grow up by himself. If u are not for your kid, who will? -
phtthp:
Yup, I have an acquittance whose 2 sons are in pathlight previously and after P3 and P4 they got transit to normal Primary School easily. I met her son before and they really dun have any signs of ASD at all.last time i rang up Pathlight school before.
i asked \"may i know what's the difference between Pathlight and other Mainstream primary schools ?\"
their reply: at Pathlight, we don't do mother tongue. But the rest of the other subjects, all same !
Pathlight is a good school for our children as its set at their pace and needs. But if possible, I would want to go mainstream as that's what the normal typical world is like. Unless he really hates going to mainstream primary school and really cannot cope, then I will of cos sign him up for pathlight.
However, when he grows up, there is no \"Pathlight\" environment, society and workplace for kids like him. Whenever possible, I will push him to the NT environment cos sooner or later, he got to face it.
I might sound harsh for putting through my son through this but I think since he need to face the real world sooner or later, might as well let him try it when P1 times come. I am not sure if my thinking is right or not. But I don't believe in bubble wrapping the world around my son. I wont be around forever to bubble wrap his world. Singapore society is harsh and very realistic and paper qualification and money is everything.
Unless I migrate to places where ASD is treated as a norm, else in Singapore society, he got to learn how to cope and control himself to blend in.
I am keeping my fingers crossed, there are mummies in this forum whom ASD kids are now in their teens and their social needs have change. I am really praying hard my son will be like their teens too. Its a life long journey, think I won't rest until the day I finally close my eyes for good. -
nugget:
Couldn't agree more. We can't protect them forever. It's better that they learn to deal with it than not ever.
Yup, I have an acquittance whose 2 sons are in pathlight previously and after P3 and P4 they got transit to normal Primary School easily. I met her son before and they really dun have any signs of ASD at all.phtthp:
last time i rang up Pathlight school before.
i asked \"may i know what's the difference between Pathlight and other Mainstream primary schools ?\"
their reply: at Pathlight, we don't do mother tongue. But the rest of the other subjects, all same !
Pathlight is a good school for our children as its set at their pace and needs. But if possible, I would want to go mainstream as that's what the normal typical world is like. Unless he really hates going to mainstream primary school and really cannot cope, then I will of cos sign him up for pathlight.
However, when he grows up, there is no \"Pathlight\" environment, society and workplace for kids like him. Whenever possible, I will push him to the NT environment cos sooner or later, he got to face it.
I might sound harsh for putting through my son through this but I think since he need to face the real world sooner or later, might as well let him try it when P1 times come. I am not sure if my thinking is right or not. But I don't believe in bubble wrapping the world around my son. I wont be around forever to bubble wrap his world. Singapore society is harsh and very realistic and paper qualification and money is everything.
Unless I migrate to places where ASD is treated as a norm, else in Singapore society, he got to learn how to cope and control himself to blend in.
I am keeping my fingers crossed, there are mummies in this forum whom ASD kids are now in their teens and their social needs have change. I am really praying hard my son will be like their teens too. Its a life long journey, think I won't rest until the day I finally close my eyes for good.
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