In-law problems?
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Blessedwife:
Oh I think u must have been very very angry that leads to the unavoidable quarrel in front of yr mil.LOLMum:
My mil went home this am with my dh.
She was shocked to see us quarreled (a few times quite bad) n hen I apologized to her for the shock she had, she kept quiet n just stroked my hands....made me cried n cried....
Guess she also know her son is not an easy peron to live with
But what to do....
We still love each other :love:
Me also at fault...so gotta change...
Hope u feel much better now :hugs:
Much better now...thanks.
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Funz:
for this, i must say, i understand Pinky Piglet.
Maybe buying some goodies for your mum as a form of courtesy, yes. But not as gratitude towards your mum for helping look after your kids right?Pinky Piglet:
Hi all
Everytime when my mil want to go for holiday she will always asked my mum to help look after my kids... Everytime she come back with goodies she will know to give some to neighbour , bil , sil but not my mum. It made me pissed it's not that I greedy over her goodies shouldn't she show gratitude towards my mum for helping otherwise how can my hubby and I go to work
No offense hor. Just find it strange that you think your MIL should be grateful for your mum helping to look after your kids.
we as wives, as the mils always say, our child bears their surnames, so its their paternal grandchild. while our own mothers are just maternal grandchild. so mil looking after her own paternal grandchild is more than just helping working mums, they will be angry if we leave our children to our own parents and not them..
so i do understand if mils want to go for holiday, no choice that child got to go to our own parents so that it does not disrupt our work..
Pinky Piglet is not wrong to think that her mil should be grateful, not the gift that counts. who will bother about the whatever goodies, its the thought... if mil can buy for sil, bil and so on, even buy for neighbours... all the more she should buy for our mums... -
Fun fun:
I've stayed with my mil for more than ten years! It wasn't easy all the time, but in all relationship you just have to give n take. As she gets older, her health is deteriorating, her mood is like 3 days wind, 4 days rain. After a long day at work, I have to make sure I enquire about her day/health and administer her medication or giving her a massage. However, I must say when I complained about my aches, she will also apply some medicated oil for me. So, thinking back, she's not too bad.
its always not as bad when u think back.. the complaints are only when u r going thru it... cos we are still gd ppl, we dun bear grudges... if after long time still angry over it, means they are really really bad... hahha... -
LOLMum:
ur mil is great... instead of helping her own son, she comforted u in a very discreet but appropriate way... Good!!My mil went home this am with my dh.
She was shocked to see us quarreled (a few times quite bad) n hen I apologized to her for the shock she had, she kept quiet n just stroked my hands....made me cried n cried....
Guess she also know her son is not an easy peron to live with
But what to do.... We still love each other :love:
Me also at fault...so gotta change... -
verykiasumummy:
wah...i maybe can do that to my parents but i doubt my wife can.
talk to them then.... they actually know but cant help spoiling..SBKS:
hi, ya we did...but not working lor...sian...duno wat to do...
cos in the end when the kids fall sick, we are the ones suffering and taking care of them not them.
so seeking advice from here....it's just the grandparents....could it be their mindset is not my DS/DH so not my pasar?
must show them some true fire one day to make them understand u r not just nagging but really mean it...
once i threw away a big bag of candies n choc in front of them! i think about 2-3kg... they got from some neighbours leftover from cny!! i was so mad and they dare not talk to me for a week.. -
SBKS:
wah...i maybe can do that to my parents but i doubt my wife can.[/quote]ur wife will just have to learn... :evil: :evil:
talk to them then.... they actually know but cant help spoiling..verykiasumummy:
[quote=\"SBKS\"]
hi, ya we did...but not working lor...sian...duno wat to do...
cos in the end when the kids fall sick, we are the ones suffering and taking care of them not them.
so seeking advice from here....it's just the grandparents....could it be their mindset is not my DS/DH so not my pasar?
must show them some true fire one day to make them understand u r not just nagging but really mean it...
once i threw away a big bag of candies n choc in front of them! i think about 2-3kg... they got from some neighbours leftover from cny!! i was so mad and they dare not talk to me for a week..
but of cos, dun abuse this method!! it is only effective if u r sooo sooo ta bo leh tahan then can use... if anyhow use, of cos it reflects badly on ur wife...
i use it wisely...
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Once I was at someone's wedding. I almost cried when the pastor said something like this \"In a few moments, you will be husband and wife. This is very significant because it means the two of you will be leaving your existing circles, to form a new inner circle. In time, your children will join you in this inner circle. Everything that you do, you must first think about this inner circle. You must always protect and love this inner circle first - then, you will have the ability to reach to outer circles together. Your spouse must always come first. Not your mother, your father, or your siblings, or your friends..... This is what your parents have raised you for as well. So parents should respect this new life that your child has chosen....\"
I was like, \"how come nobody told my hubby and my MIL that? Can you please talk to them\".... -
straffan23:
haha.... u r funny... :rotflmao:Once I was at someone's wedding. I almost cried when the pastor said something like this \"In a few moments, you will be husband and wife. This is very significant because it means the two of you will be leaving your existing circles, to form a new inner circle. In time, your children will join you in this inner circle. Everything that you do, you must first think about this inner circle. You must always protect and love this inner circle first - then, you will have the ability to reach to outer circles together. Your spouse must always come first. Not your mother, your father, or your siblings, or your friends..... This is what your parents have raised you for as well. So parents should respect this new life that your child has chosen....\"
I was like, \"how come nobody told my hubby and my MIL that? Can you please talk to them\"....
u can try hinting to them ma... not too difficult... -
straffan23:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:Once I was at someone's wedding. I almost cried when the pastor said something like this \"In a few moments, you will be husband and wife. This is very significant because it means the two of you will be leaving your existing circles, to form a new inner circle. In time, your children will join you in this inner circle. Everything that you do, you must first think about this inner circle. You must always protect and love this inner circle first - then, you will have the ability to reach to outer circles together. Your spouse must always come first. Not your mother, your father, or your siblings, or your friends..... This is what your parents have raised you for as well. So parents should respect this new life that your child has chosen....\"
I was like, \"how come nobody told my hubby and my MIL that? Can you please talk to them\"....
alamak you neber bring them to listen to this sermon leh
or best record down and repeated play it at home like a 'mantra\" for MIL and DH :boogie: :rotflmao: -
I was the photographer, mah... at that point I was probably listening too intently or cried, or had a bucketful of tears in my eyes... after the wedding my friend asked me, ey... how come got one gap no photos? :yikes: Luckily, I was only one of the three appointed photographers.
Hmm... probably will never get hubs into a church ... and if he does goto one, he will purposely switch off or try to retaliate every single word that pastor said, because he is not open minded about religions. :siao:
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