Recommendation of changes to reduce Stress for PSLE

[KSP]

pirate:

KSP:

by then RGS will have to take in all kinds of PSLE marks not only top 3%.... u still want to spend 5M for a house there??

Who cares about the PSLE marks? By then the hobnobbing is worth more than a degree.

thought the better schools to build connections are Nanyang, ACS, SCGC and MGS???

[janet88]

DKWhy:

It is also therefore NOT THE TRUTH to say that sec school will be less ‘stressful’ than PSLE. They are just different.


But kids who have mastered enough self learning skills in their early years will not suffer so much in sec schools coz chances are they will have the ‘inbuilt mechanism’ akin to ‘survival instinct’ to auto learn to adjust, adapt and survive within manageable stress. This ability comes from those chances that were given to them by not-so-KC and not-so-KS parents when they were allowed to learn to swim on own. This natural innate ability either can be built slowly or can also be taken away slowly by their very own parents during their early years.

For those kids who have been hand-held for so long, there is a high chance that they need to be handheld further into sec schools and maybe into JC and perhaps into their uni years as this may seem to be the only way that they KNOW they can float. It is a ‘pattern’, a learnt sense of helplessness that they are so used to that if removing the tuition, they may TANK!

So parents you do have a choice to be KC and KS ttm / face green green or choose to be concerned-enough parents who give only adequate support (never over support) for your children to discover their own path / way. Emphasising here is adequate support when the family and kids still can have a good balanced life that can be fun and fulfilling and not over-support till straining almost everyone.

I hope more not-so-KC and not-so-KS parents can lend your voices to balance this forum, else it fits the saying of “Three People then Tiger Becomes Real” (I can’t type Chinese). I can read some KC parents fanning some of the KS parents and then all sing together in ‘harmony’. Do new parents a favour to support the motion of primary school education indeed doesn’t need to be so stressful for the family and the children and that it is really manageable.

Sometimes ignorance is a bliss. Cannot imagine highly educated people ‘scared’ of primary school education to the extent of not willing to have kid / more kids when it is just so a tiny part of a child long journey in this wonderful life. New inexperienced parents must be ‘frightened’ by such reading!

Parents with children in primary school share their experiences here...what they have gone through/going through...and with kids in different schools, there is more to share. I believe it's not just a handful of primary schools which are forced to push the students...with some schools being more academic-driven and a reputation to uphold, the pressure in those schools are even higher. New parents may perhaps be more enlightened to read the posts and ask around before they register their kids in them...don't blindly follow the crowd when registering for P1.

[Nebbermind]

Lilac66:

During my sec days, I remember I had only 7 subjects leh

Really. I remember sec1 I had English, Lit (result combined with Eng but still a subject), Chinese, Math, Sce, Geog, Hist, Art & Tech.

[mommylow]

janet_lee88:

I admit I wasn't very ON when I took my PSLE :oops:

My mum didn't really push but then stakes weren't so high. Now, it's 'payback' time...short of walking into exam hall to sit for them.

As for sec school, lagi worse...returned to the school after I was done with O levels.

Janet, don't blame yourself that you did not study well enough to acquire better knowledge to coach your children more efficiently in their studies now.
That is belittling yourself. I know of children whose parents sre PHD holders yet their kids' academic performance is non-impressive. Every child has their own capacity to learn, do not force or compare as long as he does his best.

Have you thought of 'upgrading' yourself and go back to the primary and secondary syllables, read up and revise so you can teach your children. By doing that, you are actually learning with your children and they feel your enthusiasm and emotional support. Naturally they will be spurred to want to do better. For a start, you can write well, think
sharp and are reflective, impart this skill to your DCs. Forget about hiring tutors and more tutors to help solve their learning problems. You only do that as a last resort. The key to good learning is for students to listen very attentively in class and approach the teachers often to clear up doubts. 靠人不如靠自己. I am a perfect example. I personally coach all my kids all four su jects and I know the primary syllables by the back of my hand. I self studied them. My Chinese sucks but I took I to my own hands to teach my DCs Chinese and HCL. I bought 字辨books secondary books on chinese compo books up to 'O' levels and read thru all of them and coavh my children to write well. No tutors, because we believe in helping ourselves. My children especially my son improve by leaps and bounds and he even got the highest score for Chinese in his level for SA 1 and 2nd place for his prelims. The top in Chinese boy from China is shocked and is full of admiration for my boy's effort. 一分耕耘，一分收获. My two DDs are still grappling with their Chinese and other subjects as they are slower learners. I do not compare. To each his own.

There are many routes to success in life. What's important is for our DCs to learn to take charge of their own studies and responsibilities and learn to pick themselves up after falling down. Only then, they will learn resilience and motivate themselves to achieve. We parents should not do the worrying for them and worse pave the way for them. That will only teach them reliance on others and bad problem solvers. Get them involved to learn to help others and not keep getting help from others.

So fret not, let the DCs go out and swim with crocodiles. Who knows, they may be tougher than we think.

[janet88]

mommylow:

janet_lee88:

I admit I wasn't very ON when I took my PSLE :oops:

My mum didn't really push but then stakes weren't so high. Now, it's 'payback' time...short of walking into exam hall to sit for them.

Have you thought of 'upgrading' yourself and go back to the primary and secondary syllables, read up and revise so you can teach your children. By doing that, you are actually learning with your children and they feel your enthusiasm and emotional support. Naturally they will be spurred to want to do better. For a start, you can write well, think
sharp and are reflective, impart this skill to your DCs. Forget about hiring tutors and more tutors to help solve their learning problems. You only do that as a last resort. The key to good learning is for students to listen very attentively in class and approach the teachers often to clear up doubts. 靠人不如靠自己. I am a perfect example. I personally coach all my kids all four su jects and I know the primary syllables by the back of my hand. I self studied them. My Chinese sucks but I took I to my own hands to teach my DCs Chinese and HCL. I bought 字辨books secondary books on chinese compo books up to 'O' levels and read thru all of them and coavh my children to write well. No tutors, because we believe in helping ourselves. My children especially my son improve by leaps and bounds and he even got the highest score for Chinese in his level for SA 1 and 2nd place for his prelims. The top in Chinese boy from China is shocked and is full of admiration for my boy's effort. 一分耕耘，一分收获. My two DDs are still grappling with their Chinese and other subjects as they are slower learners. I do not compare. To each his own.

:salute: :salute: :salute:
I am totally amazed and impressed with your dedication.

Discussed the issue of secondary school with hubby last night...think my brain is on the road to recovery :rotflmao:

I did plan to upgrade/refresh myself for secondary school.
Thank you for your honest and valuable input.

[Lilac66]

DKWhy:

.


But kids who have mastered enough self learning skills in their early years will not suffer so much in sec schools coz chances are they will have the ‘inbuilt mechanism’ akin to ‘survival instinct’ to auto learn to adjust, adapt and survive within manageable stress. This ability comes from those chances that were given to them by not-so-KC and not-so-KS parents when they were allowed to learn to swim on own. This natural innate ability either can be built slowly or can also be taken away slowly by their very own parents during their early years.

I like what you brought up.
But sorry just asking coz when we discuss about self-learning skills for kids of such age, what type of skills are specifically looking at or inculcating?

For discussion sake, we'll use MAths since this is one area where parents have most grouses about- say a child is not able to grasp the model concept for in class, what does he do? Ask the teacher in class or get help from parents. What if the child is not able to clear his doubts either because the teacher is has got too much on her plate to attend to him personally or the parents are not sufficiently equipped to help him? What should he or we parents do if we want to inculcate self-learning attitude? Let's presume the child does not have tuition.

[mommylow]

Kudos to you too, Janet, for being such a caring and dedicated mom. :udawoman:

[Lilac66]

Nebbermind:

Lilac66:

During my sec days, I remember I had only 7 subjects leh

Really. I remember sec1 I had English, Lit (result combined with Eng but still a subject), Chinese, Math, Sce, Geog, Hist, Art & Tech.

I remember I had Lit only in Sec 3.

[janet88]

In a ‘faceless’ forum like this, it’s really wonderful to have helpful info to guide parents along the way…regardless of primary level.

This is why I am totally addicted, even though I was blasted earlier and felt disillusioned for a while. But told myself those who had done so are empty vessels. Forget about those ungracious vessels.

Chen, mummylow, ksp, mummy so kiasu, peony and many other wonderful parents…thank you. You really brightened my day when I felt down.

[Nebbermind]

Lilac66:

DKWhy:

.


But kids who have mastered enough self learning skills in their early years will not suffer so much in sec schools coz chances are they will have the ‘inbuilt mechanism’ akin to ‘survival instinct’ to auto learn to adjust, adapt and survive within manageable stress. This ability comes from those chances that were given to them by not-so-KC and not-so-KS parents when they were allowed to learn to swim on own. This natural innate ability either can be built slowly or can also be taken away slowly by their very own parents during their early years.

I like what you brought up.
But sorry just asking coz when we discuss about self-learning skills for kids of such age, what type of skills are specifically looking at or inculcating?

For discussion sake, we'll use MAths since this is one area where parents have most grouses about- say a child is not able to grasp the model concept for in class, what does he do? Ask the teacher in class or get help from parents. What if the child is not able to clear his doubts either because the teacher is has got too much on her plate to attend to him personally or the parents are not sufficiently equipped to help him? What should he or we parents do if we want to inculcate self-learning attitude? Let's presume the child does not have tuition.

Donch expect the teacher to be able to attend to each and every question by the students.

!st, we need to find out from the teacher what is the expected min score for that paper. The teacher must have some benchmark for each class. If my kid falls below this benchmark (or in GEP they call it baseline), then I would ask the cher if she is planning anything to help my kid, can be just 1~2 sessions of remedial just to get the concepts right. Donch need excessive remedial coz no point staying back just to do assessment papers when cannot understand the concepts.