All About Autism

[mashy]

lavendery:

I've been doing some self-reflection after my post yesterday. Actually I'm not sure if I am really fair to him in a way by labeling him as aspie. Cos he never get clinically diagnosed. He told me he was a scholar, degree holder with a decent job, who am I to question his mentality. But with the quirky behaviors he is exhibiting, I still feel... anyway it doesn't matter to me though.


We have been maintaining a cordial relationship as I wish my girl to born in a normal family with a dad and a mum. However he still pays 50% for my girl's speech therapy at Leapfrog and 50% of her medical/supplement fees on a monthly basis, though he kept grumbling about it. The rest are fully fock out by me. Hence I'm lamenting to turn to KKH rehab for her ST and OT.

I've called up social worker this morning and told her my predicament. The latter said that the EIPIC subsidy is strictly base on mean testing (joint income) unless I can produce divorce letter. She told me to try talk to my husband. Seem like she doesn't understands what autistic means. If only all things can be solved by just explaining...

I thought of integrated childcare too but the thought of her being in a NT environment for almost whole day, I'm really afraid she might get bullied as she has speech delay and poor surrounding awareness. In addition I also faced disagreement from my mum who feel that they will not feed her well in childcare.

I'm thinking of her future what will happen if I pass away. I won't have any sufficient savings for her and he told me upfront that he will spend away all his money before he dies and he will leave nothing for her. Thoughts of killing her before I pass away does cross my mind at times too. I hate myself for being so selfish and perhaps when she grows older, she might be like him, able to get a job and live independently. But clearly, she is really not as high functioning as him, he has very good memory, superb in Maths and science etc.

I'm still learning continuously from books, Internet, therapist and friends. I'm doing as much as I can to help her as long as its within my means and capabilities. I really hope she can be healthy, get a job and live independent like him

Actually a cc may not be that bad at all depending on the teachers. My boy also had speech delay. He always wondered about and refused to do his school work then. He hides in a corner to read bookd while others play. Somehow he managed to make some friends. Ok, more like those kids were accepting of him. There will always be one or two bullies but the rest stood up for him and took care of him.

Yes, since u are already not living with him, why not consider divorce? It may be better for u in the long run too. Esp since he doesn't display any love for his daughter as well. Staying married may not necc be a good thing. I came from a broken family myself and I see that for the sanity of the family, it's better to break up than to stay together.

[mashy]

Breaking news


http://www.straitstimes.com/breaking-news/singapore/story/parents-special-needs-children-get-more-guidance-20121102

[nugget]

mashy:

Breaking news


http://www.straitstimes.com/breaking-news/singapore/story/parents-special-needs-children-get-more-guidance-20121102

Thats good news. I hope there will be more awareness to help to integrate special needs kids in mainstream. Special needs children are still very stigmatized in the society.

[specialboymum]

nugget:

mashy:

Breaking news


http://www.straitstimes.com/breaking-news/singapore/story/parents-special-needs-children-get-more-guidance-20121102

Thats good news. I hope there will be more awareness to help to integrate special needs kids in mainstream. Special needs children are still very stigmatized in the society.

That is my thought too..
I felt that the approach for the support of special need education should be \"integrative\" and not \"segregative\" . More support should be given to the AED in schools to better help the special needs in mainstream.

Well, it is true that having a special school with curriculum that tailor made to our special kids will allow them to learn and strive better, however, if we hope they can be independent and earn decent living on their own, they will have to interact with others. Housing them in the same building and not giving them the chance to interact with the NTs will not help.
Having special needs kids in the same environment isn't a bad thing for NTs too, they will naturally learn to accept the special needs kids as their peers, hence when they grow up, the social stigma we are seeing now will likely not exist. I know there is some existing program which allows children from mainstream school to visit special schools, but that is so \"orchestrated\". Honestly, I don't know how a 2 hours visit will help the NT child to understand, empathize and fully accept somebody different from them...

[mashy]

specialboymum:

nugget:

[quote=\"mashy\"]Breaking news


http://www.straitstimes.com/breaking-news/singapore/story/parents-special-needs-children-get-more-guidance-20121102

Thats good news. I hope there will be more awareness to help to integrate special needs kids in mainstream. Special needs children are still very stigmatized in the society.

That is my thought too..
I felt that the approach for the support of special need education should be \"integrative\" and not \"segregative\" . More support should be given to the AED in schools to better help the special needs in mainstream.

Well, it is true that having a special school with curriculum that tailor made to our special kids will allow them to learn and strive better, however, if we hope they can be independent and earn decent living on their own, they will have to interact with others. Housing them in the same building and not giving them the chance to interact with the NTs will not help.
Having special needs kids in the same environment isn't a bad thing for NTs too, they will naturally learn to accept the special needs kids as their peers, hence when they grow up, the social stigma we are seeing now will likely not exist. I know there is some existing program which allows children from mainstream school to visit special schools, but that is so \"orchestrated\". Honestly, I don't know how a 2 hours visit will help the NT child to understand, empathize and fully accept somebody different from them...[/quote]Actually Townsville and pathlight have an 'exchange Prog'. The kids from pathlight will attend some classes in Townsville with the other NT kids. That's what I heard from a parent whose kids are in Townsville.

[Double E]

specialboymum:

nugget:

[quote=\"mashy\"]Breaking news


http://www.straitstimes.com/breaking-news/singapore/story/parents-special-needs-children-get-more-guidance-20121102

Thats good news. I hope there will be more awareness to help to integrate special needs kids in mainstream. Special needs children are still very stigmatized in the society.

That is my thought too..
I felt that the approach for the support of special need education should be \"integrative\" and not \"segregative\" . More support should be given to the AED in schools to better help the special needs in mainstream.

Well, it is true that having a special school with curriculum that tailor made to our special kids will allow them to learn and strive better, however, if we hope they can be independent and earn decent living on their own, they will have to interact with others. Housing them in the same building and not giving them the chance to interact with the NTs will not help.
Having special needs kids in the same environment isn't a bad thing for NTs too, they will naturally learn to accept the special needs kids as their peers, hence when they grow up, the social stigma we are seeing now will likely not exist. I know there is some existing program which allows children from mainstream school to visit special schools, but that is so \"orchestrated\". Honestly, I don't know how a 2 hours visit will help the NT child to understand, empathize and fully accept somebody different from them...[/quote]Totally agree. When I saw the headline of the article , I was excited. But after reading on, I am disappointed. The programme seems to be telling us parents to stop dreaming and be realistic, our special kids should go to special school and not mainstream and here..these are the reason why your kid is more suitable for special school.

I think more should be done to integrate special needs kids to mainstream school. Like what you have suggested, more AED teachers or all mainstream teachers to go through basic special needs training etc.

[nugget]

I think they are trying to put in place a program to screen our kids to get them into special school like pathlight or sped school.


I learnt that there are some children who are really special needs like having certain type of developmental delay but the parents just refuse to let them seek help. So these kids are now still in mainstream school. A teacher friend told me, these parents refuses to acknowledge the kid needs help, the teacher also cant do anything but to continue to keep them in school.

Hence I think thats why the board is set up to counsel and help those kids. But then… are there enough sped school for our kids or not? Like pathlight, its so damn hard to get in with long waiting list…

[mashy]

nugget:

I think they are trying to put in place a program to screen our kids to get them into special school like pathlight or sped school.


I learnt that there are some children who are really special needs like having certain type of developmental delay but the parents just refuse to let them seek help. So these kids are now still in mainstream school. A teacher friend told me, these parents refuses to acknowledge the kid needs help, the teacher also cant do anything but to continue to keep them in school.

Hence I think thats why the board is set up to counsel and help those kids. But then.. are there enough sped school for our kids or not? Like pathlight, its so damn hard to get in with long waiting list...

I heard from my friend, her Dd's classmate has Down syndrome. That gal couldn't cope but still in mainstream gal's school. The parents even wanna retain her for a yr but I doubt it will make any difference.

My boy's classmate who kicked him is also suspected to be special needs but his parents refused to get him diagnosed. They are very defensive and rude to the teacher. That boy is pretty violent. So there are many out there who are still in denial and insist on putting their kids thru mainstream and not getting help.

[nugget]

mashy:

I heard from my friend, her Dd's classmate has Down syndrome. That gal couldn't cope but still in mainstream gal's school. The parents even wanna retain her for a yr but I doubt it will make any difference.

My boy's classmate who kicked him is also suspected to be special needs but his parents refused to get him diagnosed. They are very defensive and rude to the teacher. That boy is pretty violent. So there are many out there who are still in denial and insist on putting their kids thru mainstream and not getting help.

Ya I agree. I spoke to one principal before as well. They have a DS girl in their school. At least our educational system doesn't not kick us out. I want to put my boy in mainstream to let him try out first.

They shld build more sped school. They know there are special needs children in the school.. yet the sped schools in SG is only a handful.

[Double E]

Btw, do your kids feel embarrassed?


Recently my boy doesn’t want me to see his poop. I tried to peep inside the toilet bowl to check if he pooped, he will push me away and tell me not to see.