All About Autism
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specialboymum:
I also don't tell any enrichment classes about his condition. He's learning tkd now just went for grading. He is slow in learning his moves so we asked the coach to demo and we video it. After that we practise at home with him. Whenever we ask if he is ready for grading, the coach gave us a look like he didn't think he will make it. Lol. Well, can't be helped. We just need to be more diligent.Great job mummies!!
The way to deal with our kids, is to be patient.. certain tasks may take them longer time to master them, but eventually they will learn to do it.
Re: labelling,
I'm also one of those parent who refuse labelling for our kid. I'm not denying that my kid is different from others and he needs additional help to learn. However, I don't like the fact that once we have the label on him, everything he does will be view through the lense call 'autism' and people tend to forget he is also a child.
I'm not sure if many of you experience this..I wanted to sign him up for enrichment classes and even some religious school, but once I mention my child's condition (I thought to be open upfront so that they won't be caught in a surprise), the reply I got is 'sorry, we are not trained in handling such kids, we suggest you try somewhere else'...they don't even let him try and certainly not even giving me the opportunity to explain that he is not disruptive in class.
Now, I don't disclose his condition when I sign him up for class but also got problem lah. Just like recently, I sign him up for martial art class. Due to his poor motor planning, he couldn't follow many action, which other kids could do so easily. The coach wasn't happy, I have to beg him to continue let him stay in the group and reassure him it doesn't matter to us if he is slow and having difficulty following, and it is perfectly ok not to give him extra attention as he also need to be fair to other students, what I hope for is just the opportunity for him to be in a group and do some form of physical exercise. -
jme:
I see. I thought we can only sign up for 1. Dunno if her subsidy, she can claim on both sides or not.
It is a private integrated cc. N that's what the mummy did. -
Blokus:
Blokus, hope this post is not too late and my two cents worth.
I should be really grateful & I am. He has no problem academically, does not have disruptive or awkward behaviors, he's socially aware & I've even seen him play appropriately with peers with back & forth talking.
I just get disappointed when I see him in social class. Although He response and follow instructions well. But he seems to fidget alot more, like he will do a break dance while sitting down & he looks away while the teacher is talking. Strangely, he sits very still in school. Or when I see how he give very weak response to friends who make effort to talk to him, I feel sad too. My heart sink whenever he shows no regard to his younger sister while all my friends' kids would play or take care of my daughter. :sad:
I know I should be counting my blessings. But you know, when you have $2, you want $5, when you have $5, you want $10. :roll:
I think its ok to want $5 or $10 when you have $2, cos thats how one strives towards excellence. But the key is to appreciate the $2 in the meantime while we work hard for the additional dollar, and to look at the value of $2 not in its absolute terms but its relativity with no money at all.
These days I am a lot calmer with my doter, cos I have begun to appreciate the essence of not comparing her with other children, whether NT or otherwise. Let her grow at her own pace. There is a lot of pressure in our society in terms of benchmarking and milestones, and all the more we need to fight this pressure within ourselves to have to conform at the expense of our child. We will still have bread and butter issues to worry about as she grows into adulthood, but we will always do our utmost to support her.
Thats not to say I dont bother about her anymore. Support is still ongoing, but it has become more baseline as part of our lives. I still strive for that $5, but perspectives are beginning to be different, if you know what I mean. -
jme:
jme, thanks for filling me in, I dint know about private integrated childcare centres. the fees are a killer ... :roll:ImMeeMee
I believe the iccp u were looking at is under govt which is why all applications must go thru CEL. However my son is with the private integrated childcare n the admission was very easy. But I am paying $1500 (b4 deducting $300) excl ot n st. Super heartache when issuing cheque every month end. School fees for nt kids is less than half of special needs kids.
There is a mummy who send her kid to divinity at bishan ( cc fees is a lot cheaper than st Gerard) n have school bus to fetch her kid to rainbow 3x a week which I think it is another good idea.
care to share how has your child progressed in this setting? -
jme:
\\ImMeeMee
I believe the iccp u were looking at is under govt which is why all applications must go thru CEL. However my son is with the private integrated childcare n the admission was very easy. But I am paying $1500 (b4 deducting $300) excl ot n st. Super heartache when issuing cheque every month end. School fees for nt kids is less than half of special needs kids.
There is a mummy who send her kid to divinity at bishan ( cc fees is a lot cheaper than st Gerard) n have school bus to fetch her kid to rainbow 3x a week which I think it is another good idea.
can afford already a blessing.. :grphug:
me cant even afford.. everyday eat plain rice oso cant come out with.. so your son is blessed at least u can come out this amount per month, just feeling the pinch only... -
Specialboymum
Re labeling, if I may offer an alternative view, I have always been upfront with my doter’s condition on any program that I want to place her on. I guess I need to be assured that she would be safe in the environment and thus there is extra supervision.
And I think where are pp who do not understand, there are also pp who do. I have placed my doter on a clay class since mid this year and the teachers are really understanding n kind. They are not trained in special needs but they were open minded to work with her. I work with them on how to manage my doter and they are keen to learn. But of course I need to be realistic n I place her in a very small class and at a level beneath her biological age, there are also no classes during hols cos afterall the school still needs to cater to the mass.
Based on my experience with looking for a childcare ctr, most centres are also kind at first contact. I have also made enquiries with an art teacher who is open about special needs children. Perhaps if we look from the business operators’ perspectives, it’s understandable that they also need to take care of their bottom line and may not have the means to cope with the additional work. -
ImMeeMee
I totally agree with u n love your posting to blokus.
May I know how old is your child?
My son joined the cc when he was 2 n half years old n it has been a year. I can’t really describe how his school has helped him cos I believe diet, Dan doc n therapies play a part in his improvement too. The reason I picked this school out of the 3 schools I visited cos I saw caring teachers n happy children. N this is very important to me as I want my child to grow up in a happy environment. -
Helplessmum,
It is true that I am lucky to be able to afford such costly fees. But I got rid of my maid n sold our family car n had to travel 4 hours on the road every weekday to send my child to cc until we decided to shift recently. I have very bad eczema n my hands always bleed with open wounds due to all the housechores n r badly scarred now. My husband works almost 7 days a week so that my kids can have a better life. I suppose one cannot have best of both worlds n sometimes sacrifices have to be made. Sorry if I crossed the line but if I were you, I would kick your husband’s ass n tell him to get a life n be a man. It irks me when I see such irresponsible man who refuse to look after his family. U can rent out a room to ease your finances. I am sure $500/ month would help too. Of course having a stranger living in the house is not the most comfortable situation but like I said, one has to give up something for another. Ultimately, it is what u really want for your child. Hope I did not offend u. -
Jme,
Omg, I too hav bad skin I perfectly understand the pains.
It’s ok u did not offend me at all. -
I found this
http://www.hpb.gov.sg/HOPPortal/article?id=10210
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