All About Autism
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Blokus:
Blokus, hope this post is not too late and my two cents worth.
I should be really grateful & I am. He has no problem academically, does not have disruptive or awkward behaviors, he's socially aware & I've even seen him play appropriately with peers with back & forth talking.
I just get disappointed when I see him in social class. Although He response and follow instructions well. But he seems to fidget alot more, like he will do a break dance while sitting down & he looks away while the teacher is talking. Strangely, he sits very still in school. Or when I see how he give very weak response to friends who make effort to talk to him, I feel sad too. My heart sink whenever he shows no regard to his younger sister while all my friends' kids would play or take care of my daughter. :sad:
I know I should be counting my blessings. But you know, when you have $2, you want $5, when you have $5, you want $10. :roll:
I think its ok to want $5 or $10 when you have $2, cos thats how one strives towards excellence. But the key is to appreciate the $2 in the meantime while we work hard for the additional dollar, and to look at the value of $2 not in its absolute terms but its relativity with no money at all.
These days I am a lot calmer with my doter, cos I have begun to appreciate the essence of not comparing her with other children, whether NT or otherwise. Let her grow at her own pace. There is a lot of pressure in our society in terms of benchmarking and milestones, and all the more we need to fight this pressure within ourselves to have to conform at the expense of our child. We will still have bread and butter issues to worry about as she grows into adulthood, but we will always do our utmost to support her.
Thats not to say I dont bother about her anymore. Support is still ongoing, but it has become more baseline as part of our lives. I still strive for that $5, but perspectives are beginning to be different, if you know what I mean. -
jme:
jme, thanks for filling me in, I dint know about private integrated childcare centres. the fees are a killer ... :roll:ImMeeMee
I believe the iccp u were looking at is under govt which is why all applications must go thru CEL. However my son is with the private integrated childcare n the admission was very easy. But I am paying $1500 (b4 deducting $300) excl ot n st. Super heartache when issuing cheque every month end. School fees for nt kids is less than half of special needs kids.
There is a mummy who send her kid to divinity at bishan ( cc fees is a lot cheaper than st Gerard) n have school bus to fetch her kid to rainbow 3x a week which I think it is another good idea.
care to share how has your child progressed in this setting? -
jme:
\\ImMeeMee
I believe the iccp u were looking at is under govt which is why all applications must go thru CEL. However my son is with the private integrated childcare n the admission was very easy. But I am paying $1500 (b4 deducting $300) excl ot n st. Super heartache when issuing cheque every month end. School fees for nt kids is less than half of special needs kids.
There is a mummy who send her kid to divinity at bishan ( cc fees is a lot cheaper than st Gerard) n have school bus to fetch her kid to rainbow 3x a week which I think it is another good idea.
can afford already a blessing.. :grphug:
me cant even afford.. everyday eat plain rice oso cant come out with.. so your son is blessed at least u can come out this amount per month, just feeling the pinch only... -
Specialboymum
Re labeling, if I may offer an alternative view, I have always been upfront with my doter’s condition on any program that I want to place her on. I guess I need to be assured that she would be safe in the environment and thus there is extra supervision.
And I think where are pp who do not understand, there are also pp who do. I have placed my doter on a clay class since mid this year and the teachers are really understanding n kind. They are not trained in special needs but they were open minded to work with her. I work with them on how to manage my doter and they are keen to learn. But of course I need to be realistic n I place her in a very small class and at a level beneath her biological age, there are also no classes during hols cos afterall the school still needs to cater to the mass.
Based on my experience with looking for a childcare ctr, most centres are also kind at first contact. I have also made enquiries with an art teacher who is open about special needs children. Perhaps if we look from the business operators’ perspectives, it’s understandable that they also need to take care of their bottom line and may not have the means to cope with the additional work. -
ImMeeMee
I totally agree with u n love your posting to blokus.
May I know how old is your child?
My son joined the cc when he was 2 n half years old n it has been a year. I can’t really describe how his school has helped him cos I believe diet, Dan doc n therapies play a part in his improvement too. The reason I picked this school out of the 3 schools I visited cos I saw caring teachers n happy children. N this is very important to me as I want my child to grow up in a happy environment. -
Helplessmum,
It is true that I am lucky to be able to afford such costly fees. But I got rid of my maid n sold our family car n had to travel 4 hours on the road every weekday to send my child to cc until we decided to shift recently. I have very bad eczema n my hands always bleed with open wounds due to all the housechores n r badly scarred now. My husband works almost 7 days a week so that my kids can have a better life. I suppose one cannot have best of both worlds n sometimes sacrifices have to be made. Sorry if I crossed the line but if I were you, I would kick your husband’s ass n tell him to get a life n be a man. It irks me when I see such irresponsible man who refuse to look after his family. U can rent out a room to ease your finances. I am sure $500/ month would help too. Of course having a stranger living in the house is not the most comfortable situation but like I said, one has to give up something for another. Ultimately, it is what u really want for your child. Hope I did not offend u. -
Jme,
Omg, I too hav bad skin I perfectly understand the pains.
It’s ok u did not offend me at all. -
I found this
http://www.hpb.gov.sg/HOPPortal/article?id=10210 -
Immeemee
Thank you for the wise words. I agree no less. Even for NT kids, it's not healthy to compare with others. As you say, the best way is to compare our kids against themselves; how they improved over the year. And my son has made remarkable improvement this year, I'm so proud of him for sure. However, I'm not dishearten because I'm comparing him with NT kids. I'm just dishearten whenever he displays autism sign. Perhaps I am still in denial.
What I meant was, he's case is very mild, even milder than the high functioning, milder than the mild cases. As compared to many of you here, I've much, much lesser to work on & I really should'nt be complaining. He's very near to NT, so even if I compare him with NT kids, he's either advance or just a few steps behind.
That's probably why, in social class, I expect him to be the 'better' kids. But I get a rude shock each time, because he moves & fidget, looking away when teacher is talking etc. I've not seen him act like this in school nor the teacher. It just makes me feel dishearten because it pulls me back to, well perhaps, reality that he does have some autism signs. But during the week, in school, at home, he looks like any regular kid that i always slip back to thinking that he's NT. Come sat, I get all dishearten again. :sad: -
Blokus,
what is social class? school & teacher also consider social class too. cuz both are in group?
maybe school he already very farmilar. at times they still can generalize once they change of enviroment.
may i know what u say social class wat are this?
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