How do your kids de-stress ?
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buds:
Hi Buds, rereading what you said, I wonder if it all boils down to what personalities our kids have. I read that boys in particular tend to have the sort of brain that would be easily addicted to computer games. Not all boys, but unfortunately, my son fits the profile - if he likes something, he'll like it excessively (I feel). As in, he has no time for other things.Heyya Tam.. i guess where the norm now is that both parents hafta go out
to work, computer games and handhelds are easy access and keeps the
child busy at home which is still better than going out with god-knows
what kind of friends, right? Especially for older children and tweens. For
parents who can afford to be home, then mebbe more outdoorsy stuff
would be more possible... like swimming, jogging, blading, cycling... (etc)
and also other indoor activities like scrabble, pictionary, monopoly.. (etc)
too.
Younger children easier to find stuff for them to do. Older ones are the
more challenging ones to help de-stress. As children grow, they like would
be keen in other things their age. I suppose it is a matter of parental
choice and situations & not necessarily a matter of whether it is a good
thing or a bad thing.
It is true though that if we do not introduce, they wouldn't know. But let's
also think about it in another way. If the child gets introduced to it in
school or after school by other friends and we do not know... child
borrows and plays with it... God knows what kinda games they're
playing... :roll:... wouldn't it also prove to be a good thing that our kids do
know how to use them wisely & appropriately? As in we have set good
examples of proper time management and proper usage of devices just
like the use of the PC. Cannot say oso that we shouldn't introduce them
to use the PC for fear of them in future jumping into pornographic or those
suicidal sites.. right? As children grow, the world also keeps evolving...
technology keeps evolving. For me, i do find it is also relevant to keep up
with the times for certain things.
...
I do understand that from your experience it has been tough not to
associate gaming devices with addiction.. which leads to the eventual
downfall of the child's life. Hence you have a strong views for it which
are true, happening and very valid.
But then again also cannot blanket sweep right... :oops: :siam: cos it
doesn't necessarily mean that though one child IS like that, EVERY other
child will be like that... or will end up like that or be lead to that, god
forbid. :xedfingers: We can learn from the examples of others. Good
& bad examples can be used for our own reflections as to how we
want our children to be in future.. so subjective choices are really for
parents to make and decide.
So in our case, I think we have to do the \"later is better\" type of introduction to computer games. Yep, he'll see it in school. Sure he'll learn it from his friends, but I'm not going to buy him one to play with for the foreseeable future.
Last night at my friend's annual Christmas party, all the boys were huddled around little screens. Even the younger ones who had gone on to P1 last year were doing the same, kind of like an annual graduation into PC gaminghood when they go to school. Only the kids who haven't as yet stepped into P1 were still running around, but the picture will likely change again next year. It struck me doubly hard cos my son will be in that \"cohort\" from next year.
Think I'm dragging this out to comment because I was a bit disturbed by what I saw. -
It's ok with me.
Guess it reali boils down to many aspects la.
Environment, parental involvement and guidance, time of intro,
discipline, character and a wealth of other areas to look into.
Even so, we may still not know if after all the resistance to
introduce later will not end up with addiction. I'm just saying no
two apples are quite the same, that's all there is to it. Though
mine aren't addicted now mebbe since they're younger and can
still adhere to reasoning (listen to parents) and not that hard-
headed tween yet, they aren't showing signs of being attached
to gaming. But should i allow them to play with the handhelds
for more than what is initially allowed, i am pretty sure they
wud think of games all the time too. Since i'm the SAHP, i am
fortunate to have the luxury to look out for such signs (if it shud
arrive...
nott..)... and find other stuff to do with them
when they are done with schoolwork or on school breaks/hols.
We didn't introduce it in fact.. The girls were planning on saving
school money plus festive $ collections to get one. Hehee.. I
stalled it last couple of years by saying i don't have enough $
to buy. I get them to think that buying one would be akin to
not eating for 300 over days.... to save at the rate of $1 per
day. So, it might justify getting one for them IF they scored
say 100 over 100 for all 3 subjects??? :rotflmao: 300 over
days cannot eat, no joke ya know.. :lol: Since their handhelds
were gifts from gramps, i had to push forward the disciplinary
stuff and time management much earlier. Just thankfully, for
now... they are fine with or without the hand held. Not die-die
must play everyday kind... so i guess i'm blessed... For
awhile..
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As for the part of the norm of social gatherings..
For us we plan to have stuff for everyone to do
when we meet up. If per se Christmass, we'd
have other than makan, there wud also be
family games and banter where everyone is
included. Like the occasional simon says game,
charades, pictionary, or going through the old
photo albums for reminiscence of \"who was that\"
guessing games.... Children are not necessarily
cornered to one place where they do their own
stuff...
And usually PCs in the host/hostess' home wud
not be on. The parents do not take out handheld
games for the children to play even if they have 1.
We move around the family groups and take the
time to catch up with everybody in the extended
family as what the gatherings were intended for.
At times, old family videos wud be screened so tt
everyone can see how life was back then and agn
begin the chatter on how kampong spirit reali was
so much fun.
If as adults, we allow the children to do their stuff
to keep them quiet at every gathering since they
were young, it would seem natural to be in the
same environment every year down the road to
all the family gatherings.
So the idea is preferably to get everybody involved.
At least that's how it is with our gatherings.. And it
is a nice feeling... of strong kinship. Hopefully the
family events that we've enjoyed thus far remains
that way. :grphug: -
buds:
Yah so true. And really, we can't tell if they'll be addicted or not in the future. Remarkably, my son isn't addicted to the TV, so who really knows what makes them tick!!It's ok with me.
Guess it reali boils down to many aspects la.
Environment, parental involvement and guidance, time of intro,
discipline, character and a wealth of other areas to look into.
Even so, we may still not know if after all the resistance to
introduce later will not end up with addiction. I'm just saying no
two apples are quite the same, that's all there is to it. ..
About your other post - PC games was definitely the baby sitter for the evening and more . It's good to be a SAHP so we can keep watch. Me PT-SAHP but mostly manageable so far (like you say, still young wor, so he'll listen).
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By exposing our kids to a wide range of hobbies and interests, kids have more choices and it is less likely that they become addicted to PSP or computer games.
Yesterday I brought my kids to http://www.claycove.com/ for a pottery class, and they really enjoy it. Today I was making air dry roses with my kids, and I realize that it is a great way for me to de-stress.
During long drives, we don't have any TV or toys in our car. My kids will find something to talk about, and they will talk to each other all the way home. I am happy to see this interaction, rather than to have each child glued to a PSP.
Many hobbies can have good outcomes. For example :
Addicted to reading - I was addicted to reading Chinese novels when I was a teenager, the outcome was that I scored top marks for Chinese all the way to JC.
Addicted to baking - can open bakery chains or become successful like Breadtalk, or work as bakers to earn a living
Addicted to sewing - can become world famous fashion designer, or open up shops to custom make clothes to earn a living
As for addiction to PSP and computer games, there are only negative outcomes : bad eyesight and headaches from staring at the screen for too long, loss of concentration when not playing games, mental block when solving maths problems, and don't expect to earn a living playing computer games. -
Bb... bb...but... Chief is addicted to everything and
anything computer... and he's quite the IT expert! :siam:
I like IT stuff too but i'm just only addicted to KSP. For real! :oops: -
Blobbi:
About your other post - PC games was definitely the baby sitter for the evening and more
. It's good to be a SAHP so we can keep watch. Me PT-SAHP but mostly manageable so far (like you say, still young wor, so he'll listen).
Yah, dunno yet in future how.
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buds:
There are hundreds of other things that can be done using the computer besides playing computer games. I wrote earlier that I am only against playing meaningless games. In my previous job, I spend 8 hours a day looking at the computer, anyway my eyesight has suffered, and I also suffer from headaches.Bb... bb...but... Chief is addicted to everything and
anything computer... and he's quite the IT expert! :siam:
I like IT stuff too but i'm just only addicted to KSP. For real! :oops: -
Agree.
The part on \"meaningless\" and may i add \"violent\" games
as well... the part on the headaches... the part on the
specky... i agree. Speaking of which, there ARE good
games that can be uploaded on hand held devices
IF the time should come...
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tamarind:
Eh? But Lego have moveable parts no? Lego gears are great if your kids like to build their own contraptions. But lego pieces are smaller. Zoob is friendlier for little hands.My kids like to play with ZOOB. It is even more interesting than Lego, because the parts can move.
http://images.google.com.sg/images?sourceid=navclient&rlz=1T4SUNA_enSG308SG308&q=lego+gears&um=1&ie=UTF-8&ei=t9A4S92VDM-IkAWt7JCFCQ&sa=X&oi=image_result_group&ct=title&resnum=4&ved=0CB0QsAQwAw
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