Do you cane your daughters when they misbehave?
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octoberbaby:
How hard do you cane your kids to have the cane break easily? :yikes:I use the cane bought from outside but no use, too soft, bend and broken easily.
Now using anything that can be found in the house. Caning not everyday affair but accumulative mistakes.
Because the kids move during canning, sometimes, cannot target properly. The cane marks will be everywhere on the arms and legs. Let teachers see, it is ok, at least they know how to handle my kids. -
slmkhoo:
Yeah....tell your MIL to ignore her tantrums and refuses her demands until she ask properly or behave. Only then will she learn her lesson.
Even if your sil doesn't do anything about it, your mil can take some steps to discipline the girl. Discipline doesn't need to be caning, and in fact, my personal view is that other methods of discipline can be more effective for kids this age. You could suggest to your mil that when the girl is rude, she should tell the girl how to express herself properly, then refuse to acknowledge the girl until she does it properly. She will have to put up with a lot of screaming and yelling at first, but the girl will eventually get the message if your mil is firm and consistent. I did that with my girls at home when they were even younger, and it worked.mummyJune:
my 6 yr old niece is very rude to her grandmother who is my mil. there were so many times when she will shout & demand things loudly to my mil. Last night she did it again & i asked my mil why did she not scold this granddaughter or tell her mum(my sil) about her bad behaviour. Mil said she had told my sil so many times but no use because sil behaviour is exactly like her daughter, both of them are rude & not respectful at all. MIL also said she is worst than a maid. last time FIL cane my niece when she is very naughty, but sil scold FIL & say he abuse her daughter but problem is sil is the mother yet her daughter misbehave she never teach properly still want to scold FIL. Sometimes really got no eye to see. i see my inlaws being treated like that i feel sad for them.
MIL said my niece behave very badly at home whilelse at school she is so quiet, does not talk to ppl. I really don't understand why got such parent like my sil, her daughter scream & shout at mil, she also never scold her, just let her be. -
slmkhoo-ok, i will let my mil know. but mil always said is sil spoilt her daughter.
everyday i see mil so tired, & because sil has 3kids & mil is taking care of 2 of them(6y,5y & 2yr)-the 2yr is in fullday childcare while the 2 older kids are attending 4hr kindergarden but the thing is when school-holiday starts, the 2 older kids doesnt have school,(their kindergarden follows school-holidays on calendar) they will stay home with mil & mil really dread school holidays. now she complains abt the older kids being so difficult to take care. rude & cannot control. imagine 5 & 6yrs old still sucking pacifier & sleeping in the sarong. Yes is true. i witness it myself. shocking discovery. when i asked mil why are they still sucking pacifier & sleeping in sarong, she said sil let them do it. Duno y got such parent.
Mawar-wow, thats really brave of u to do that. most ppl like me will just look & go. thumbs up for u! -
Mawar:
:rahrah: :rahrah: :imcool: :imcool: You were cool, lady!! Think the parents also at a loss of how to deal with their kid. Well, guess you've taught them a lesson then and there!
Pray I don't see your niece in action! :rotflmao:
I witnessed a boy about 9/10 years of age shouting at his mom. He kicked and shoved the shopping trolley towards her. This went on for awhile. I had walked away but my feet made a detour. I held on to the trolley, looked the boy firmly in the eye, and asked him to take a grip of himself. Told him his behaviour was most unbecoming and rude. If he continued with his tirade, I would call the police for disrupting the peace.
I was prepared for the mom to turn on me. Both of them stared at me, didn't say a word and walked away.
Actually I am a very cool and collected person by nature. If given the choice I would just walk away. With that boy, I felt like I had to do my civic duty. Couldn't turn a blind eye and just walk away.
Maybe these days some parents have become too 'democratic' that they don't know when to put their foot down and set the limits. -
I still see a 5 yr-old kid wearing pull-up pants.
I see a 7 yr-old kid drinking milk from baby milk bottle. -
Seems like grandparents should not give in to the kids & let the kids get away with their naughty behaviour?
octoberbaby-yes i seen a 9yr old kid also drinking from milk bottle -
Not only grandparents, MAID is another problem in handling the kids.
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My son is 3, and very impulsive and mischievous. He even started to tell a lie the other day. I don’t cane him, but I smack him on the bum (hard). He will laugh if you don’t hit hard, so must hit hard enough for him to pout or cry. My heart is so painful whenever I hit him. I was not a believer of hitting children until my son defied me and tried to run towards a road when he was 2.
If you visit those western parenting websites, most overwhelmingly abmonish corporal punishments such as smacking and caning. But what should we do if the child is like mine? Active, excitable, cheeky, sharp, impulsive and curious? I only want him to be safe.
I always remind him of the most important expectations such as holding hand, no running off, or walking beside mummy, and it works 90% of the time, with a verbal or physical reminder every now and then. 10% of the time, he will still run off to follow whatever has caught his interest! And he won’t stop even if you shout.
I am preggy now and super slow… Feel like getting a leash! Or a cane! -
My son is 3, and very impulsive and mischievous. He even started to tell a lie the other day. I don’t cane him, but I smack him on the bum (hard). He will laugh if you don’t hit hard, so must hit hard enough for him to pout or cry. My heart is so painful whenever I hit him. I was not a believer of hitting children until my son defied me and tried to run towards a road when he was 2.
If you visit those western parenting websites, most overwhelmingly abmonish corporal punishments such as smacking and caning. But what should we do if the child is like mine? Active, excitable, cheeky, sharp, impulsive and curious? I only want him to be safe.
I always remind him of the most important expectations such as holding hand, no running off, or walking beside mummy, and it works 90% of the time, with a verbal or physical reminder every now and then. 10% of the time, he will still run off to follow whatever has caught his interest! And he won’t stop even if you shout.
I am preggy now and super slow… Feel like getting a leash! Or a cane! -
Missk
Some kids does not like to have their hands held. Tiring maybe?
When I need to slow my boy down or ensure a constant grasp on him, I give him a haversack. Put in some toys,abooks jacket, his favourite, just adequate weight. Then I hang onto the top bag handle - I am not very tall
- and it acts as my alternative to lease.
As you are heavily pregnant, try tto avoid outside trips alone if possible. Kids being kids, tend to forget rules when excited. Jmo
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