In-law problems?

[vinegar]

now i am no longer enjoy going out wf DH even there is chance for us to go out as couple. Indeed it has created a strain in our r/s. We do things separately nowadays.Coz I no longer wanna share my thought or feelings wf him…knowing that he’ll share everything wf his mum. He seems doesn’t understand…coz he has lived wf his mum for the past 32yrs.He feels it is a norm for her to call everyday,he feels it is norm to share everything wf her.


I’ve to learn to accept it…even after 10yrs of marriage…i am still learning to accept.Coz he expects me to accept it.

I understand his difficulties.Coz if one day he ignores her mum’s call or doesn’t share his daily life wf her,she’ll be upset.

I would rather go out wf friends than wf DH nowadays.I would rather share my feelings wf my friends…I would rather do things alone,if i can’t find any friends.

[cherrygal]

yes, being married to a mama’s boy is no bed of roses… hang in there


But sometimes when I am in a generous mood, I will thank her in my heart for producing such a nice boy that takes good care of me… we just can’t get past the "self" at times, like what ImMeemee mentioned.

[cherrygal]

phtthp:

what is \"无明\" in English ?

解释：不能见到世间实相的根本力量，也是我们执取和贪嗔的根源。

The inability to see the truth... Source of our wants and desires...

[vinegar]

cherrygal:

yes, being married to a mama's boy is no bed of roses... hang in there


But sometimes when I am in a generous mood, I will thank her in my heart for producing such a nice boy that takes good care of me... we just can't get past the \"self\" at times, like what ImMeemee mentioned.

thanks for ur encouragement

[ImMeeMee]

cherrygal:

phtthp:

what is \"无明\" in English ?

解释：不能见到世间实相的根本力量，也是我们执取和贪嗔的根源。

The inability to see the truth... Source of our wants and desires...

I tend to think of it as blind spots in layman terms.

[ImMeeMee]

cherrygal:

phtthp:

what is \"无明\" in English ?

解释：不能见到世间实相的根本力量，也是我们执取和贪嗔的根源。

The inability to see the truth... Source of our wants and desires...

I tend to think of it as blind spots in layman terms.

[Funz]

This CNY, I insisted that DH take the lead to arrange the reunion with MIL and SIL now that FIL is no longer with us. We had a cosy dinner at home. MIL said this was the first reunion without FIL and she was dreading it. SIL said she was so busy she did not want to come. DH was upset with both MIL and SIL’s attitude and DD’s untimely chicken pox and wanted to call the whole thing off but I persisted. Though it took a bit of pushing from me, after dinner, MIL, SIL and DH all showed their appreciation for my effort and pushiness. My kids got to spend time with MIL.


Since DD is down with chicken pox, we were unable to go about out usual visitations. DH wanted us all to just stay home. I told him no way. At the very least, we still have to go bai nian with his mum and my parents. However, as it turned out, MIL opted to work through the CNY, maybe cos she wanted to keep busy to avoid feeling the absence of FIL. I told DH to pin down a day and time, even if it is in the evening of a week day, we go bai nian with her. I brought DS to bai nian with my mum and my uncle on chu yi while DH stayed home with DD. On the 3rd day of CNY, all my relatives who were not at risk of chicken pox infection came to our place and that made DD’s day.

I pestered DH about going to bai nian with his mum. He was puzzled about my insistance. I told him I am surprised myself but I just feel that it is not right for him not to bai nian with his mum. Told him he was filled with regrets about the things that he did not do for and with his dad when FIL passed away, so do not let the same thing happen with his mum.

[ImMeeMee]

cherrygal:

phtthp:

what is \"无明\" in English ?

解释：不能见到世间实相的根本力量，也是我们执取和贪嗔的根源。

The inability to see the truth... Source of our wants and desires...

I tend to think of it as blind spots in layman terms.

[Imami]

ImMeeMee:

cherrygal:

[quote=\"phtthp\"]what is \"无明\" in English ?

解释：不能见到世间实相的根本力量，也是我们执取和贪嗔的根源。

The inability to see the truth... Source of our wants and desires...

I tend to think of it as blind spots in layman terms.[/quote] It can also be termed ignorance.

[Imami]

When we were looking for our first home, we decided we would get a flat in hubby’s neighbourhood (instead of mine, he lived in t payoh and I lived in the west). We got a flat a distance away (short walk 5min) but pil’s unit can see our unit. During the first few years after I shifted in for good, within 5min the lights went up in my unit, hubby’s phone will ring. It will be mil most of the time - asking want to go dinner outside, or "I cook xxx, u want to come and eat?" or we are watching movie aaa now, you want to come and join us?" when I purposely left the toilet light on because I was all alone at home, sil would SMS and remind me that I had forgotten to off the light.


It was very irritating. It came a point when it strained our relationship because I would insist that hubby’s folks were watching us. Haiz…

I only have one son. I hope I don’t become like that next time (but my hubby is not the only child la)…