Club SAHM
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slmkhoo:
DS will scream joyously I'd threw away his food! No food never mind, we used to joke that he survives on air. Eating AND drinking milk are really chores to him. When he was younger, he's take an hour or more to eat and drink his milk. DH does not have patience. So the maid ( made sure i was present always at these times ) and I would take turns....share in the pain.
I have no such patience. From the time my kids were toddlers, I threw away meals that weren't eaten in 30mins (and no snacks or milk till the next meal). I only did that once or twice per child and it never happened again.vinegar:
same...my son eats brocolli,cabbage,cucumbers,cauliflowers,potato.
he takes at least 1 hour to finish his meal,irregardless whether there is any food of his liking.
As he grew older, I'd allocate 45 mins to his lunch. Usually, I let him eat by himself for the first 25 mins, then I'd take over to feed him. There's usually a carrot for him to finish his meal, eg no cartoon today if he doesn't finish and extra reward if he finished food by himself.
Dinners are easier cos I usually cook one of his favourite dish. He can throw up everything if he does not like the taste of the food. We eat together. He'd be the last to finish but thankfully I don't need to feed him for dinner.
People don't realize that he is actually a very fussy eater when they see him... It's hard work keeping him that weight. -
what is ur son weight?
I can understand ur agony.Each time i complained to my colleagues(was working that time),my colleagues consoled me n said her brother used to survive on milk & biscuits when he was small.Now he is very big n macho…n eats a lot! esp come back fr. army,his mum spends the whole day in kitchen,keep cooking for him. -
vinegar:
My DH is also protected from his mum since young. But luckily, he went oversea for his Degree, therefore, that force him to be independent. If not, he will forever be mummy's boy too.
I eat leftover food for lunch.DH is small eater,doesn't eat a lot.TheAnswer:
Hey Vinegar,
Try not to eat leftover food all the time. My DH will try to finish the dishes cos he knows I will throw them away. He hates to waste food. Now only occasionally some soup left over which sometimes he will drink up before leaving for work the next morning or I will have it for lunch.
frankly,i am kinda sianz over on & off quarrel.All along,my DH cannot stress well,i know he is trying.I can't help him much except to load him off fr. hsework n coaching for DC.Other than that,i don't know how i could help him coz i nid help for myself as well.I am actually \"bitting my lips to pull thru\".
perhaps this is a typical trait of mummy's son.He is very well-protected in the terms of emotionally,financially,physically since young.While i am the one being threw inside the jungle n survive by myself....
i feel my DH has prob to ask for help n make decision. He has a capable mother who handles everything for him.....so i always remind myself not to do so for my DC,if not,they'll follow their father footstep n lose survival skills.
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slmkhoo:
I wish I can do that. I did try to do that, but was not successful, as the in laws will always give snacks to the kids when they refused their meals.vinegar:
i don't hv the heart to do that.....But i feel i am running out of patience.As what Buds & smartmummy advice,i've to start somewhere,if not,this things will keep going on.
I had to steel myself to be hard-hearted in those early years, but I told myself that the earlier I start the better, and missed meal or 2 has no impact on their overall health. In the event, it only took a couple of times (and not consecutive meals) to teach them, and I've had trouble-free years since. If my kids pick at their food, I know that they are genuinely not hungry for whatever reason. -
my DH always let my son plays games. It has since become a habit.
yesterday,I told him off. I don’t mind let him relax after CA1,but not this type of relax.I very against games playing. Thus,I always get him go out explore nature or sports.But sometx,i am tired from cooking,hsework n coaching him homework,hv very little energy left,to play sports wf him.DH also lazy… -
vinegar:
i hate it when hubby tells me something but yet does something else...very soon, i am going to sing, 'papa preach but never does'.my DH always let my son plays games. It has since become a habit.
yesterday,I told him off. I don't mind let him relax after CA1,but not this type of relax.I very against games playing. Thus,I always get him go out explore nature or sports.But sometx,i am tired from cooking,hsework n coaching him homework,hv very little energy left,to play sports wf him.DH also lazy... -
janet_lee88:
It's important that parents are on the same page with child discipline. Can you get your husbands to sit down and agree to some base rules? You may have to compromise on some areas where you have different opinions. But it's best to do it when the kids are not listening as they will play one parent against the other if they can.
i hate it when hubby tells me something but yet does something else...very soon, i am going to sing, 'papa preach but never does'.vinegar:
my DH always let my son plays games. It has since become a habit.
yesterday,I told him off. I don't mind let him relax after CA1,but not this type of relax.I very against games playing. Thus,I always get him go out explore nature or sports.But sometx,i am tired from cooking,hsework n coaching him homework,hv very little energy left,to play sports wf him.DH also lazy... -
Slmkhoo,
My DH agrees wf me.But he couldn’t manage my son constant pestering.My DH always has this prob–not assertive.He is not assertive to his parents,kids requests. -
hubby is not assertive as well…which is why his family can climb on top of his head…he agrees with me regarding discipline…but don’t know why he cannot assert his stand with the kids.
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vinegar:
Then maybe you can ask him to always refer your son to you when it comes to games? In my family, there are some areas which are governed by each of us, and mostly, the things involving the kids are handled by me since I'm with them more. So my husband usually asks my kids \"Have you asked mummy? What does she say?\" and send them to me if they haven't. Or if we are unsure if the other will agree over an issue, we will give conditional permission, eg. \"... only if daddy doesn't have other plans for today\" or \"let me check with daddy first\". It prevents us from giving conflicting messages to the kids. And once a decision is made, both of us will stand by it and not let the kids use one against the other. Also, we don't allow pestering and whining. My kids learned from toddlerhood that the best way to get a 'no' from us was to nag, and whining would mean deprivation of what they wanted for another few hours/days (depending on age).Slmkhoo,
My DH agrees wf me.But he couldn't manage my son constant pestering.My DH always has this prob--not assertive.He is not assertive to his parents,kids requests.
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