Stay At Home DAD

[SBKS]

sorry for digging up the thread…


but are there more SAHD or WAHD that can comment on the lifestyle he is in right now and are things the same as what you expected before becoming SAHD or WAHD?

trying to explore this option right now?

given the current society, its difficult to change the mindset of man working and woman staying at home.
and also i believed that given a fair comparison where same industry, similar scope of work, same age, the women will still have higher pay than men due to women coming out to work earlier than men who are serving NS.
that is to assume that nothing wrong or bad comes along at work to the 2 on the above example. I am not in that example as my career took ahit. Instead of 2yrs experience, my wife gt 4.5yrs more experience than me. so as mentioned in prev posts, i should be the one staying at home to be practical.

So for wat I foresee for me becoming a SAHD, I think I might get bored soon doing all these stuff over and over again. Any SAHD can help to determine if its true?

any other things that I need to prep myself if i were to be SAHD?

[pirate]

SBKS:

any other things that I need to prep myself if i were to be SAHD?

You don't get maintenance (aka as alimony) on a divorce. It's called the Women's Charter.

Choi choi choi! Dai kat lei si! :siam:

[sharonkhoo]

SBKS:

So for wat I foresee for me becoming a SAHD, I think I might get bored soon doing all these stuff over and over again. Any SAHD can help to determine if its true?


any other things that I need to prep myself if i were to be SAHD?

I think all SAHP get bored! And FTWP also get bored doing housework after returning home. So that is not really an issue at all - it just has be done, and someone has to do it.

I think the main thing you have ask yourself is whether your ego and self-esteem can take the comments you will get from family, friends and complete strangers. It was bad enough for me when I became a SAHM (shock and horror that I was 'wasting' my education, doing 'maid's work', reducing the family income, etc etc), and I'm sure it will be worse for you. My husband has told me frankly that he could never do it. I would say that it may be crucial for you to have some kind of paid employment or income even while you are a SAHD just so you can say that you are a part-time or freelance something. Just my thoughts.

[Joule]

when push come to shove, I am mentally preparing myself to do this in a few years time.


doesnt make sense to get wife to stay at home. She is better off outside. She earns much more than me. But I earn slightly higher than median income of Singaporeans.

If need to, we can manage.

but of course, I am trying to learn and master things like online equities/shares trading etc so that I can have a bit of cash flow and make a bit of money without being employed.

I imagine I might join the legion of dads who send kids to school by riding bicycle. But with the traffic nowadays, must start every day with a prayer to get to location and come back safely.

[sharonkhoo]

Another thing to consider is whether your wife is happy with the idea. Some women (not all, of course) would love to be SAHM and may feel envious that their husbands are getting the chance to stay home with the kids, even with the boredom, housework etc.

[timtamfan]

Hi. I’m a WAHD. Became this in 2004 due to company restructuring (transfer overseas or …) and with a special needs child (then age 3). We’re fortunate that family income is sufficient. My reflection on this topic :


1) I think the first is personal mindset. There are at least two aspects to the SAHP job - child(ren) related and chores-related. I think every parent loves the first and I daresay not as many like the second as much. Another human needs everyone has is the personal development. So if anyone wants to consider to stay at home, they should look at how they would cope with these three areas. As we have been blessed, I’ve managed to focus almost exclusively on the first, delegate the chores to a fantastic helper, and work a bit from home for personal growth

2) As SAHD, we (at least I) have faced that ‘look’ which says why are you living off your other spouse ? Need to grow a thick skin. I tell myself that my wife and I had agreed in principle that one parent should be home (parenting responsibility cannot be subcontracted out), she’s with the stable and well-paying job, and this situation is probably temporary only while the children needs us. Hopefully like SAHM, we SAHD/WAHD can integrate back to the working world when the need and time comes (it is a given that the spouse is fully endorsing the move to stay at home in the first place, of course)

3) I would also like to perhaps draw attention to the value a home parent may bring. Being present at home is great but I think being engaging is a more satisfying for parent and child. So whilst it may be written that home parents be maid and driver, I hope that people realize also that parents can play the special personalized tutor. I have developed that philosophy so I also have to learn and go through what the kids do (be it academic, sports etc). Over the past years, I’ve had to learn about Lego, electronics, ping pong / badminton etc so that I am able to engage better with my children

[KSP]

to me SAHD are those who already achieved financial independent… i know a few who are in their 30s, 40s and 50s…

[SBKS]

pirate:

SBKS:

any other things that I need to prep myself if i were to be SAHD?

You don't get maintenance (aka as alimony) on a divorce. It's called the Women's Charter.

Choi choi choi! Dai kat lei si! :siam:

HUH?? sorry i had no idea what you are talking about. I was asking if there is anything that I should prep myself in order to be a SAHD.

[SBKS]

slmkhoo:

SBKS:

So for wat I foresee for me becoming a SAHD, I think I might get bored soon doing all these stuff over and over again. Any SAHD can help to determine if its true?


any other things that I need to prep myself if i were to be SAHD?

I think all SAHP get bored! And FTWP also get bored doing housework after returning home. So that is not really an issue at all - it just has be done, and someone has to do it.

I think the main thing you have ask yourself is whether your ego and self-esteem can take the comments you will get from family, friends and complete strangers. It was bad enough for me when I became a SAHM (shock and horror that I was 'wasting' my education, doing 'maid's work', reducing the family income, etc etc), and I'm sure it will be worse for you. My husband has told me frankly that he could never do it. I would say that it may be crucial for you to have some kind of paid employment or income even while you are a SAHD just so you can say that you are a part-time or freelance something. Just my thoughts.

yes that i fully agree.

slmkhoo:

Another thing to consider is whether your wife is happy with the idea. Some women (not all, of course) would love to be SAHM and may feel envious that their husbands are getting the chance to stay home with the kids, even with the boredom, housework etc.

yes my wife is not ok about it. but things need to be done then someone got to do it as well.

[SBKS]

Joule:

when push come to shove, I am mentally preparing myself to do this in a few years time.


doesnt make sense to get wife to stay at home. She is better off outside. She earns much more than me. But I earn slightly higher than median income of Singaporeans.

If need to, we can manage.

but of course, I am trying to learn and master things like online equities/shares trading etc so that I can have a bit of cash flow and make a bit of money without being employed.

I imagine I might join the legion of dads who send kids to school by riding bicycle. But with the traffic nowadays, must start every day with a prayer to get to location and come back safely.

becareful on the bicycles. you have lots of obstacles.

online earning money gt many types. The plan is that i should earn some money doing freelance or online business. but of cos that is secondary and kids are first.