All About Autism
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nugget:
yeah, my doter has also been telling me that she wants to go back to the place that we just holidayed in. But lucky me she didn't throw a tantrum when going back to school. We just told her that we will go someday and she accepts that. Maybe another thing to do is to go for other outings during weekends so that family fun outings become a regular feature and it does not appear too roller coaster for the child in terms of emotional regulation? I don't know, just some thoughts.
ImMeeMee,
Thanks for your suggestions. I will applied them at home tonight. They reasoning with them \"Why\" is good. Usually I just tell him \"You must go to school because no one is looking after you\" etc etc.. Maybe I should try another approach telling him about what he can do in school etc.
Yes, after drawing him out from kid's club, I kept him by my side. We did have a good time
Thats why now he doesnt want to go to school and he say we will go back to the resort next week. Funny guy..
But you are right about letting go part. Sigh.. At some point, we need to let them try out things on their own. I am always worrying about him. -
ImMeeMee:
Lucky you, mine till today still throw tantrum when its time to go to school. I must break this chain before it become a regular bad habit.
yeah, my doter has also been telling me that she wants to go back to the place that we just holidayed in. But lucky me she didn't throw a tantrum when going back to school. We just told her that we will go someday and she accepts that. Maybe another thing to do is to go for other outings during weekends so that family fun outings become a regular feature and it does not appear too roller coaster for the child in terms of emotional regulation? I don't know, just some thoughts.
We have events lining up (parties, going to play gym, sentosa etc). But everytime come back, he will throw a fuss about not going to school. Even my NT boy after weekend (esp long weekends), usually fuss when going to school too. Sigh.. maybe it runs in the family. After long weekend/holiday I also don't feel like going to work. Haha. -
Break of routine. My boy is able to convey message by simple word. Maybe your boy not able to express his frustration? But then again, normal child also have this tantrum. I witness a normal girl vomited before going to school. The mother just instruct the helper, clean her and change her, move on. It should be a phrase I guess. Persevere on! Encourage him, I am sure he will bypass this phrase.
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This brought tears to my eyes...
http://sg.news.yahoo.com/blogs/mrbrown/turning-twelve-090136439.html#more-id
Turning Twelve
by mrbrown
A few days ago, my firstborn turned twelve.
Twelve years old: One cycle of the Chinese zodiac. The number of years it takes to make a single malt whiskey. The year for Primary School Leaving Examination.
Twelve years ago, my child was born. Sixteen years ago, my wife and I got married. And twenty-four years ago, my wife decided she would go steady with me.
Little did we know where our journey as a couple would take us. Little did we know of the challenges, and the joys, ahead.
But here we are. With three children. And the first one just turned twelve.
It wasn't what we envisaged for our firstborn, to be honest.
My wife looked forward to shopping for clothes with her. Maybe pick out some nice dresses together. Maybe argue over things like whether she is allowed to wear makeup or have her ears pierced.
Or maybe fret over her exams. How she is doing well in English but just getting by with Maths. Or whether all those hours she spends on the phone with her best friend was affecting her studies.
Or perhaps we are worrying over her time spent on the computer, on Facebook, on Twitter, on WeChat, or whatever new social media thing that young people now use to communicate. And wondering if there are any boys in her friend lists.
And maybe, for her twelfth birthday, there is this big party, and she is allowed to invite all her friends from school. They have fruit punch, play games, exchange presents. And music from Justin Bieber, One Direction and Owl City is played loudly.
And perhaps as a gift, we take her to Demi Lovato's first one-night concert at Hard Rock Hotel at Resorts World Sentosa on Monday night. And like cranky parents, complain on our own Facebook when Lovato takes more than an hour to start the concert.
None of these things happened on the day my oldest daughter turned twelve. Faith has autism, a fairly serious form of it, which we have known since she turned two.
She does not have spoken language (we like to say, YET). She still has some problems with toilet training. And her senses often cannot deal with her surroundings and she needs to shut down or find a behaviour to cope with the overload. Her progress through life, to even grasp the most fundamental and practical aspects of daily living, will be long and arduous.
But she is the sweetest girl ever. Not a mean bone in her body, always with a ready smile and an awkward wet kiss for a familiar loved one. She loves going to Special School.
And lately, she has even shown signs of teenhood. She is no longer a baby or a toddler. She is growing into a tall lithesome young lady with long lanky legs that love to run (sometimes at the most inappropriate moments).
She loves teeny pop music and dances and laughingly jumps to it. She rejected a pair of black shoes my wife gave her to wear, picking out her pink shoes instead. She likes to go out more, and puts on her shoes to indicate it.
Twelve years old. My Faith is twelve. She has never called us Papa and Mommy before but she doesn't need to. We know she knows who we are in her life, and we will be her family for the rest of our lives, even if she never says those words ever. -
The year when my daughter turned 12, we had our first mother-daughter conversation. She has language processing issues as well and found it difficult to express herself. Most times we just talk at each other.
I still remember that day. I had picked her up from grandma’s place and we were walking to the bus-stop. I was asking about her day. Her usual answer is "good", "ok" and I guess that’s about it. But that day, she spoke to me about her future, her dreams. She wanted to be an Occupational Therapist. I asked her why? She replied, "I want to be like F (her OT at that time) so that when I grow up, I can help others just like me."
I teared after hearing that. Gives me hope that she will be alright. -
Yes,I read the write-up by Mr Brown too. In fact, I follow his stories on Faith.
tabgha, how old is your daughter? So sensible of her to aspire to be an OT to help others with similar conditions. Hope her aspiration will become a reality. -
tabgha:
Yes, its really touching how Mr Brown and his wife are open about their daughter's condition, and how eloquent they are in expressing their love for their daughter.This brought tears to my eyes...
http://sg.news.yahoo.com/blogs/mrbrown/turning-twelve-090136439.html#more-id
Turning Twelve
by mrbrown
A few days ago, my firstborn turned twelve.
Twelve years old: One cycle of the Chinese zodiac. The number of years it takes to make a single malt whiskey. The year for Primary School Leaving Examination.
Twelve years ago, my child was born. Sixteen years ago, my wife and I got married. And twenty-four years ago, my wife decided she would go steady with me.
Little did we know where our journey as a couple would take us. Little did we know of the challenges, and the joys, ahead.
But here we are. With three children. And the first one just turned twelve.
It wasn't what we envisaged for our firstborn, to be honest.
My wife looked forward to shopping for clothes with her. Maybe pick out some nice dresses together. Maybe argue over things like whether she is allowed to wear makeup or have her ears pierced.
Or maybe fret over her exams. How she is doing well in English but just getting by with Maths. Or whether all those hours she spends on the phone with her best friend was affecting her studies.
Or perhaps we are worrying over her time spent on the computer, on Facebook, on Twitter, on WeChat, or whatever new social media thing that young people now use to communicate. And wondering if there are any boys in her friend lists.
And maybe, for her twelfth birthday, there is this big party, and she is allowed to invite all her friends from school. They have fruit punch, play games, exchange presents. And music from Justin Bieber, One Direction and Owl City is played loudly.
And perhaps as a gift, we take her to Demi Lovato's first one-night concert at Hard Rock Hotel at Resorts World Sentosa on Monday night. And like cranky parents, complain on our own Facebook when Lovato takes more than an hour to start the concert.
None of these things happened on the day my oldest daughter turned twelve. Faith has autism, a fairly serious form of it, which we have known since she turned two.
She does not have spoken language (we like to say, YET). She still has some problems with toilet training. And her senses often cannot deal with her surroundings and she needs to shut down or find a behaviour to cope with the overload. Her progress through life, to even grasp the most fundamental and practical aspects of daily living, will be long and arduous.
But she is the sweetest girl ever. Not a mean bone in her body, always with a ready smile and an awkward wet kiss for a familiar loved one. She loves going to Special School.
And lately, she has even shown signs of teenhood. She is no longer a baby or a toddler. She is growing into a tall lithesome young lady with long lanky legs that love to run (sometimes at the most inappropriate moments).
She loves teeny pop music and dances and laughingly jumps to it. She rejected a pair of black shoes my wife gave her to wear, picking out her pink shoes instead. She likes to go out more, and puts on her shoes to indicate it.
Twelve years old. My Faith is twelve. She has never called us Papa and Mommy before but she doesn't need to. We know she knows who we are in her life, and we will be her family for the rest of our lives, even if she never says those words ever.
Happened to chance upon this letter from the wife. It may have been dated but it still touched my heart greatly when I read it ...
http://www.mrbrown.com/blog/2006/09/to_mothers_of_a.html -
Double E:
agree. I hope that one day I can get to hear my doter's dreams and aspirations coming from her too!Yes,I read the write-up by Mr Brown too. In fact, I follow his stories on Faith.
tabgha, how old is your daughter? So sensible of her to aspire to be an OT to help others with similar conditions. Hope her aspiration will become a reality.
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Double E:
Hi, my daughter is 15 now. It's been a roller coaster ride. So many ups and downs. There are days when life is good and I think all is well. And then, there'll be the dark days where I feel doom and gloom. And then, I try to remember the happy days, the days of progress and I feel better again.Yes,I read the write-up by Mr Brown too. In fact, I follow his stories on Faith.
tabgha, how old is your daughter? So sensible of her to aspire to be an OT to help others with similar conditions. Hope her aspiration will become a reality.
She is in regular secondary school. Because of her language processing issues, used to wonder if she can make it to mainstream. She has difficulties with pragmatics and semantics. Like many of you here, we had struggled whether sending her to Pathlight, Rainbow or normal primary school when she was in K2. Another struggle was whether to defer by 1 year going into P1.
We got her to take the P1 readiness assessment - she was found to be not ready. EP advised defer by 1 year.
At the end of the day, my husband and I decided to take the plunge and send her to a mainstream school together with her age peers, much to EP chagrin...
The reason why we did what we did, was that, we took our girl's psyche and self-esteem into consideration. We figured that if we were to defer her, her self-esteem and confidence will be badly affected. She will feel lousy about herself and we did not want that to happen.
We \"shopped\" around for pri schools that we feel have a suitable and nurturing environment. Studying in a top school is not our priority. In the end, decided on a mission sch which we felt had a holistic and caring environment.
When she went into pri school, the first 2 years were ok. But come P3 onwards, it was a struggle. Her language processing was hindering her progress. We wondered if we had made the right decision.
Someone said that my daughter should drop out of mainstream and go into a special school. Another said to take foundation subjects.
I was very angry that people (friends and some tutors) would even suggest such things. Refused to believe that we have to resort to that. Whilst I am realistic - knowing my daughter's challenges, I also strongly believe in giving her the opportunities to lead a normal life. I believe she has a good chance as the next person to be the best she can be. It's ok if she is not in top class etc, but she does something she is interested in.
In the end, she is in regular mainstream secondary school. Glad that we never gave up on her. And she never gave up on herself too. -
Mummies ,
Where can I get toddler shin protector ?
Soon my son legs will be broken … All bruises n cuts from falls n hit .
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