In-law problems?
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KSmom8:
:yikes:Was wondering .... Are MILs nice because their DIL is fierce?
My mum said I should have got out of bed, fill the pail with water and drag it to the living room, and start mopping the floor in front of her, FIL and DH, in my pregnant state. I was like :scared: :yikes: then, but my mum said, wasn't that what MIL expected of me, to specifically make an effort to speak personally to me about it? After that \"suggestion\" from my mum, I never mention any inappropriate and tactless comments from MIL to my mum. Afraid she will \"scold\" ( or do something ) when she meets MIL.
Ask your hub to mop in MIL's presence :evil: -
sleepy:
DH doesn't do household chores, only wash dishes ( and that's only when I force him ) ... Spoiled by MIL. We had a part time maid, so floor was perhaps not spotless but definitely not sticky.
:yikes:KSmom8:
Was wondering .... Are MILs nice because their DIL is fierce?
My mum said I should have got out of bed, fill the pail with water and drag it to the living room, and start mopping the floor in front of her, FIL and DH, in my pregnant state. I was like :scared: :yikes: then, but my mum said, wasn't that what MIL expected of me, to specifically make an effort to speak personally to me about it? After that \"suggestion\" from my mum, I never mention any inappropriate and tactless comments from MIL to my mum. Afraid she will \"scold\" ( or do something ) when she meets MIL.
Ask your hub to mop in MIL's presence :evil:
Asking DH to mop ( if he agreed to do in first place) would not be as effective... Imagine if I had dragged the pail and mopped - in my pregnant state plus was advised by gynae to have bed rest state - in front of FIL and DH ( who were unaware of MIL's private conversation with me ). FIL and DH will be like :? Then I would just have to mention what MIL said. Can you imagine what they'd be thinking of MIL? Hopefully will see her true colors...
That's why I think my mum was probably a fierce DIL... Maybe that's why she said my paternal grandma was the nicest MIL.
Sometimes, I wonder if I had insisted on having things my way, wasn't so compromising, showed more \"color\" to MIL, would she have been a nicer MIL? Should have known when we were getting married... MIL insisted on having dinner at a restaurant, no hotels. I actually agreed without any questions...foolish me. -
straffan23:
Wahaha i hv d exact sane scenio! Wen I just gvn birth to DD while breastfeeding in d bedroom my ILs will open door themselves, marched into my bedroom n \"stared\" into my BREAST! Tho MIL was d one in d bedroom \"staring\", ny bedroom door is wide open wif my FIL sitting in d LV room looking into d bedroom. You guys may termed it as concern, bt during my confidment mth wif all my hormones haywired, I am damnnnn pissed!
Thanks, buds.... We were past that point trying to make her understand that it is not nice to anyhow drop in - she insists that since we're not thieves and neither is she so one should not be scared no matter who opens the door and/or what time!! And of course, when SIL wants to come or relatives wants to come she automatically brings them over - unlocks the door herself and everyone, give tour around the flat, blah blah...buds:
Dearest straffan23, only someone who has gone through the same scenario as you are will understand what you are going through. We do not know the full picture of your family's state of affairs but just know this... that i can empathize with what you are going through. :hugs: It's :siao: really... 5 times a day. :roll:
As for your doubts in the other thread on \"Moving in with MIL?\"... I think you know the answer to that already without anyone re-affirming it for you.
As for moving in... I know it won't work out - what remains is for my DH to see it that way - sigh... Things that disturbs me doesn't disturb him! E.g. my MIL could come when DH is taking a nap, goes around the flat looking for DH... when finally find him sleeping in the study she would sit next to the sofa bed and start talking to him. Or just sit there read newspaper waiting for him to wake up! Things like that irks me to no end. :slapshead: :slapshead:
Another espiode was wen we moved to a new place, hubi gvn them out set if keys ( wh i dun object) bt d last straw was web MIL bought her frenz over for a free tour without US d owner ard!!! Can u imagine how shock i am wen i open d door to see SO MANY STRANGERS in d hse!!!!! Even tho is titally empty... I dun feel good! -
I will never forget how FIL supported his leg on my dressing table...mind you, that is my master bedroom. That dressing table was a gift from mum. i was boiling mad. Told hubby to see for himself...hubby told his father to sit in the living room. His mother asked for keys to my house...she herself said her friends want to see what Singapore flats are like :mad: told hubby, NO WAY.
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janet_lee88:
His mother asked for keys to my house...she herself said her friends want to see what Singapore flats are like :mad: told hubby, NO WAY.
Your mil also live in a flat right? Then cant her friends view her own flat? -
My MIL called to inform me her SIL ( whom I never met ) already on way and coming to my place. Couldn’t say I was going out cos was pregnant and on bed rest.
Opened door to a stranger, showed her around, had to entertain her ALONE. I think she stayed for an hour, though it seemed like more. Never saw her again.
Very weird. And all so that MIL could show off MY place to her SIL. -
my confinement was a disaster.MIL n SIL invited their relatives n frds came to our home n stayed till midnight. DH still had to send them back.
i was on c-section.slow recovery+bf oredi very tiring,still hv to entertain them.DH also not understanding.Hope next life dh becomes woman. -
KSmom8:
not weird.Happened to me also.When i was on confinement,MIL's relatives came alone n i nvr met them too. Worst of all,they came one by one n at different timing.My MIL called to inform me her SIL ( whom I never met ) already on way and coming to my place. Couldn't say I was going out cos was pregnant and on bed rest.
Opened door to a stranger, showed her around, had to entertain her ALONE. I think she stayed for an hour, though it seemed like more. Never saw her again.
Very weird. And all so that MIL could show off MY place to her SIL. -
bil's 5 room was in bishan...and so she wants bragging rights.
asked sil and myself for house keys. sil asked her 'what for?' then she hinted to me about house keys but i ignored her. she has lots of nonsense...sil told me she brought her friends to visit her at workplace :faint: -
janet_lee88:
why brought her frds to visit her at office??bil's 5 room was in bishan...and so she wants bragging rights.
asked sil and myself for house keys. sil asked her 'what for?' then she hinted to me about house keys but i ignored her. she has lots of nonsense...sil told me she brought her friends to visit her at workplace :faint:
My MIL once owned the hse keys...wah....no way we could rest. :yikes: She suka suka came,even wkend. :rant:
After we shifted to new pl, she didn't know how to come.our pl is quite remote,not so accessible by public transport.
She hinted she wanted to visit us,but we simply no time to entertain her.Coz i know once we started the visitation wf her,it'll be never ending story.
:scratchhead:
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