Is this behaviour of teacher acceptable?

[angel89]

Its not acceptable for every parents. Teachers should learn how the proper way to discipline a child. I think discipline is more appropriate than punishing a young kid Children need to learn the basics of child discipline and responsibility from an early age. Discipline helps changing our child’s behavior. It is not about forcing them to obey and follow direction. It helps our children learn their limits.

[2ppaamm]

yeomaylin:

Welcome any advice on how I shd handle this.....


My ds is in P1. One day I found that he did not submit one of his hw and I insisted he has to submit it the next day. After many days, he still did not sumit it. He finally admitted that he was very afraid that his form teacher will tear his hw in front of the class. When he said that, i could see tears welling up in his eyes. My son is a very emotional child. He cried easily, eg, he cried sadly for those who were being killed in World War 2 when he watched the documentary show.

Last night, he told me that he loves to go to sch but he is very afraid to study in his class becoz of his fierce form teacher!
- His teacher WARNED the class that she will tear their hw if they submit them late.
- his teacher always screams at his classmates. Ask him why is that so, he said he didn't know the reason.

P1 & 2 students r supposed to wait at the sch canteen (opp the bus bay) for their parents to fetch them. That day, I was late and my son just happened to walk to the sch bus bay to talk to his classmate. The principal saw it and immediately pulled him back to the canteen, thinking that he wanted to walk ou of the sch. The principal called for my son's form teacher and insisted that she waited with my son in the canteen to wait for me. When I arrived, I saw my son started crying and I believe he must be scolded. When the teacher saw me, she shot like machine gun with her squeaking voice \" you know ah, your son run away like that, I will get into trouble you know. I have to be responsible for him. I have to answer for it. I need to answer for his safety, you know...... Blah, blah, blah\". Initially I apologise for it but when she kept repeating I, I, I...... It is very obvious that she is more worried abt herself being held responsible that my son's safety!!! The next day when I arrived to pick up my son, I saw her staring impatiently at my son. When she saw me coming, she just nodded her head with a LONG face and walked away.

Gosh! Now I understand why my son is so afraid to attend his class. We will be having a parent-teacher session in June soon and I wonder shd I brought this up to the teacher. I can sense that she is a very sensitive teacher (believe other parents had complaint abt her before in the past years). Some of my friends against the idea coz they said that the teacher may 'mark' on my boy for the next 2 yrs (same teacher to teach P1&2.) :slapshead: gosh! What shd I do? Pls advise..

If you will not stand up for your child, then who will? I think the biggest mistake I made when it comes to my son's education was not to confront his teacher and principal when they were really nasty to him. It turned out, they will become more and more defensive and the poor kid will be at the receiving end of the bully. Yes, I think teachers do select and bully certain kids, and sounds like yours is a victim.

The repercussions can be really bad, and the child could retreat and mine nearly went into depression and had anxiety disorders, so my advice is to take the courage, face the teacher, and complain to MOE directly if her action continues. He is there for an education, not to feed the sickening teacher's strange tantrums. There's nothing wrong with your child, so stand up for him before there is.

Hope this helps!

[vinegar]

in my ds’s school,i heard my ds said the parents always complain,also make the teachers do a lot of coordination such as getting additional assessment books,etc.


I notice that also,during the parents-teacher meeting.The parents made lots of suggestions.

The teachers provide updates on lessons they’ve taught n going to teach. I also receive some guidelines(but always last minute b4 test/exam),i believe,these shld be requested by parents.

[vinegar]

i feel it is absolutely not right to tear hw in front of the class. Nevertheless,i oso heard fr my ds his english teacher criticized his classmate's mother(i mentioned it b4).This teacher oso threw OHP or something coz she was pissed off wf student.


Last yr,our son was allocated to aircon classroom which caused his allergic,thus,he fell sick quite frequently.The mgmt claimed that they service the aircon regularly but didn't show the evidence.We took efforts to get doctor cert,sent request directly to the principal.It wasn't a smooth process.We tried soft approach,if not,we even thought of writing to newspaper.

Last month,i was late for abt half an hour to pick my ds.He was left alone at the bench,the security went off.We wrote to principal,was surprised with his reply.

Sorry to say that, well....that's explain why the ex-principal has time to look for online :censored:

[hannahk]

Yes our children are our blood and bone.


Sometimes, we intervene too much, we spoil the system. But on the other hand, if we leave it to the school, our children may end up being the victims.

Not acceptable but I believe, we should not intervene. What we can do as parents is to speak privately to the teacher, observe what the teacher says and work something out together. The teacher is still in charge.

We as parents have all the rights to take over and say, "teacher, you are doing something wrong and I am going to …(change school, complain to p, write to stomp, take over, or whatever it is)"

What will our children see? What will they learn? What will other children see? How will the teacher react? Will the teacher still want to play a role in moulding your child’s growth? Or will the teacher leave your child to do whatever he wants in the future (bo chup)? Will the child still give the sacred respect to the teacher in charge?

What do you guys think?

[2ppaamm]

hannahk:

Yes our children are our blood and bone.


Sometimes, we intervene too much, we spoil the system. But on the other hand, if we leave it to the school, our children may end up being the victims.

Not acceptable but I believe, we should not intervene. What we can do as parents is to speak privately to the teacher, observe what the teacher says and work something out together. The teacher is still in charge.

We as parents have all the rights to take over and say, \"teacher, you are doing something wrong and I am going to .....(change school, complain to p, write to stomp, take over, or whatever it is)\"

What will our children see? What will they learn? What will other children see? How will the teacher react? Will the teacher still want to play a role in moulding your child's growth? Or will the teacher leave your child to do whatever he wants in the future (bo chup)? Will the child still give the sacred respect to the teacher in charge?

What do you guys think?

I think the educators should never have the rights to hold us ransom. If they are wrong, they should be taken to tasks. Too many of our children grow up with disorders and often due to irresponsible educators who think they have the rights to do whatever they want.

Of course, if it is about the syllabus or school work, we have to leave that to the teacher, but when the child is hurt emotionally, I think we have the right to intervene and stand up for the kid, one month or two might be too late, and it might take another 2 years to reverse the damage they make. Ultimately, whatever the educator does, he walks away from the problem, we are left to pick up the pieces, and the child lives with the scars. What are parents for if they cannot even stand up for their kids in times like these. And I am not saying to go to school and 'fix' a teacher who is unfair, or a child who quarrels. This teacher is obviously not suitable to teach unless she understands the impact of her actions.

[Hiholow]

hannahk:

Yes our children are our blood and bone.


Sometimes, we intervene too much, we spoil the system. But on the other hand, if we leave it to the school, our children may end up being the victims.

Not acceptable but I believe, we should not intervene. What we can do as parents is to speak privately to the teacher, observe what the teacher says and work something out together. The teacher is still in charge.

We as parents have all the rights to take over and say, \"teacher, you are doing something wrong and I am going to .....(change school, complain to p, write to stomp, take over, or whatever it is)\"

What will our children see? What will they learn? What will other children see? How will the teacher react? Will the teacher still want to play a role in moulding your child's growth? Or will the teacher leave your child to do whatever he wants in the future (bo chup)? Will the child still give the sacred respect to the teacher in charge?

What do you guys think?

I think what u said is right.

There is a line that has to be drawn. It can be acceptable and not acceptable depending on what kind of mistake our children had made. Not all children are the same, some need hard approach whereas some need soft approach. My younger DD need hard approach and I gave the teacher permission to punish her if needed and it works for her, school teacher tore up her XI ZI, because her handwriting is really cannot make it, she came home to complain. I told her she deserve it and that she shud start writing neatly so she dont get embarrassed in class, because even i cannot tolerate. only after 6 months with that very strict teacher, she changed her writing.

Elder DD cannot scold, a bit will cry so I always have to be very careful with her and i also told her teachers about it, so her teachers know and are careful with her as she is an introvert.

[ammonite]

2ppaamm:

Ultimately, whatever the educator does, he walks away from the problem, we are left to pick up the pieces, and the child lives with the scars.

Exactly.

[ammonite]

We as parents have all the rights to take over and say, \"teacher, you are doing something wrong and I am going to .....(change school, complain to p, write to stomp, take over, or whatever it is)\"


And how do you think a teacher like that will react? Especially if you have ALREADY told her that your child needs a certain approach?

What will our children see? What will they learn? What will other children see? How will the teacher react? Will the teacher still want to play a role in moulding your child's growth? Or will the teacher leave your child to do whatever he wants in the future (bo chup)? Will the child still give the sacred respect to the teacher in charge?

Of course not to everything above. The teacher is not interested in moulding the child's growth in the first place, or she will not behave like this. With complaints, the child is condemned to being ignored and left out in the cold. Respect needs to be earned.

What do you guys think?
If it is the main teaching teacher and an entrenched problem, change class or change school.

[ammonite]

yeomaylin:

phtthp:

Is it possible to transfer yr son to another class ?

I can bring this up to the principal but strongly believe it Will not be possible. The principle is well known for being stubborn and not opened to feedback.

yeomaylin,

You have to think seriously how much your child can take without being damaged in some way, esp if his teacher will still be taking him next year.

You can raise it quietly with the principal, especially with the tearing of books issue. You can also talk to other parents and get their feedback. If all of you feel the same way, you can make a joint case.

In some schools, the identity of the child whose parents complain to the principal is not revealed to the teacher. But this is not always the case. Generally if the identity is revealed, the teacher will mark the child, or take a very hands-off approach towards the child. This is according to teachers I know, and also my own experience.

It is a tricky stressful situation. I hope it works out ok in the end for you!