All About Teaching Values
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insider:
Insider, you have a very fine young man there. You must be so proud of him.My 16 years old son shared something with me that overall I feel proud of him.
While walking along a path after alighting from an MRT station on the way to his grandma's house, he saw two maids with an old lady who was walking with a hunch back and a stick.
He walked past them and sort of hearing one of the maids scolding that old lady. He couldn't figure out her language but from her tone, it seemed like she was scolding that old lady. He continued to walk as he also wasn't sure whether the maid was talking loudly to her friend (the other maid).
He walked away from them but kept turning back to look at the three of them. Then, he confirmed that the maid was scolding that old lady. He turned and walked towards them and the maids were not aware of this KPO boy coming their way. Next, he ran towards them when he saw the maid pushed that old lady.
At the moment of fury, he approached the maid...and well...didn't really do something right... He pushed the maid on her shoulder and told her, \"You cannot do that to an old lady!\".
All maids and old lady kept quiet. He was sort of lost of his speech.
On his way to grandma's house, he asked himself whether he should accompany that old lady home and inform her family members about the maid's behaviour. He dismissed that idea after thinking maybe the family members may think that he should mind his own business. But that probable plight of that old lady continue to disturb him.
Upon reaching grand parents' house, he asked his grandma whether they were being bullied by anyone and if yes, have to tell us and he recounted the incidence of that old lady.
I actually didn't get the first hand news from him but from his grandparents who called me to tell me what a brave boy he is. When I asked him for the full details, he asked me back whether he was wrong in not accompanying that old lady home and his worry about old lady having indifferent family members.
I told him if I were him, I will accompany that old lady home. If her family members turn up to be someones indifferent, and so be it. In life, we have to be upright and with 正气 and we do things if they are right and for all elements that are beyond our control, we just have to let them be with a peace of mind. I praised him for his guts and couraged and told him as a 16 years old, what he did was sufficient and he will improve further in his 'crisis management skills' when he matures further and asked him not to be so guilty about not accompanying that old lady home. Basically, telling him to give himself time to be as stable and fearless as mummy...
PS: He was especially furious to read the news about that man who killed the dog by throwing it against the wall. He was angrier with the public who witnessed the incidence but didn't stand up to stop him. He further cannot understand if the public was worrying about personal safety and therefore not stepping forward, then why can't any of them to stand up as a witness? He asked me about social responsibility, he wonders about human's heart...
Out of fun, I asked him whether he could remember when he was younger and I asked him to tell two young men to give up their seats for a pregnant woman and he refused (out of shyness). He said vaguely can remember. Then I asked further what was the question he asked me after I returned to him when he refused and I stepped up to ask the young men to give their seats up. He said he couldn't remember. I told him, the first question he asked me was, \"Mummy, you are not afraid of those men beat you up for being busybody?\" He laughed. I used this to illustrate that he will continue to mature and hopefully well into a brave man... -
Teaching of values is the job of parents. But some parents are so focused on academic results of their children, they forget about other non- academic but extremely important values their children are lacking. My sister is one such example. My niece is in an elite sch, but when we go to her house, she would not even come out of her room to greet me, not a word of ‘Hello, aunty’. During Chinese New yr, not a greeting, not a word of thanks after collecting angpow. And my sister did not even correct this. No basic manners, no respect for elders…
When I visited her sch’s open house, I was also very disappointed to see that the students there are very aloof and unhelpful, maybe it’s the sch’s fault too. -
Many schools do emphasize the importance of moral education and values. But parents and family members still play the most vital roles, i.e they must be the good role model for the young.
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LLK:
where got? nowdays many teachers also donoo head and tail. ang mo values maybe la.Many schools do emphasize the importance of moral education and values. ....
LLK:
yes, if parents can. but if like those teachers, no hope liao!... But parents and family members still play the most vital roles, i.e they must be the good role model for the young.
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wapobs:
My DD's primary and Sec schools did that in Chinese moral education lesson. May be not all schools do that
where got? nowdays many teachers also donoo head and tail. ang mo values maybe la.LLK:
Many schools do emphasize the importance of moral education and values. ....
LLK:
yes, if parents can. but if like those teachers, no hope liao!... But parents and family members still play the most vital roles, i.e they must be the good role model for the young.
If we want our children to learn those values, we parents must of course try our very best to be their first teacher to show and teach them all that. That should be one of our responsibilies:) -
While I agree that teaching shd come from parents, it is not utmost important!
“Practise what you preach” is! The kids these days have a great sense of awareness and they r watching us all the time! -
Nebbermind:
I think I am a good citizen who give way to the needy when boarding the bus. My elder boy who seldom takes public bus with me is able to do the same too. My P4 boy whom I always take bus with DOES NOT :oops: Why? I thought I hv bn setting good examples with my behaviour and verbal teachings.While I agree that teaching shd come from parents, it is not utmost important!
\"Practise what you preach\" is! The kids these days have a great sense of awareness and they r watching us all the time! -
perhaps u can look at it another way, ie, if u have NOT been, then will your elder kid do it? :? Well nebber know...
Guess some kids r more receptive...some not that they're not careful...just they cannot be bothered...
Still, fundamentally, a leader gotta lead by example... -
As long we parents keep showing and sharing (telling them nicely) the right values with our kids, they will surely and slowly pick up some of them. It is also true that we should always set good example for them to emulate:)
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breguet:
:thankyou:
{sorry, all thumbs this morning. trying this again.}ZacK:
Actually the idea was not my own but I read it somewhere and decided that it made sense :lol:
Brought my son to the supermarket again today. As he was agreeable during lunch today, told him that we could stop by the supermarket to grab Yakult for him... This time round while on the way there I reminded him that he could get anything (Yakult inclusive) up to a value of S$3.
At the supermarket, saw that canned lychee was on offer and picked up a can... Never did I expect my son to go \"Noooo papa, we had lychee yesterday, so we don't have to buy it today...\" Hmmm caught me by surprise as he had never said No to lychee before :shock:
Anyway, found the Yakult and took a pack of 5... It cost S$2.85... Told him that a pack is $2.85 and 2 packs would cost almost $6... So I tested him if we could get 2 packs? He said we don't have enough $$ for 2 packs so just get 1 would be enough.
Hmmm... Wonder if it was fluke or was he just really in a good mood... We took the pack of Yakult, gave him $3 and queued with him to make payment. This time round was really effortless as there was no crying or begging that I had to deal with.
Have decided to adopt the same approach for his birthday and Xmas where he'll be given a budget of $40 on each occasion to get whatever he wants.
Hopefully by doing this... He'll learn to appreciate that resources are limited and he needs to choose wisely on how he should utilise his resources to meet his wants.
Very glad for you that this is working! I'm inspired to try harder!