Logo
    • Education
      • Pre-School
      • Primary Schools Directory
      • Primary Schools Articles
      • P1 Registration
      • DSA
      • PSLE
      • Secondary
      • Tertiary
      • Special Needs
    • Lifestyle
      • Well-being
    • Activities
      • Events
    • Enrichment & Services
      • Find A Service Provider
      • Enrichment Articles
      • Enrichment Services
      • Tuition Centre/Private Tutor
      • Infant Care/ Childcare / Student Care Centre
      • Kindergarten/Preschool
      • Private Institutions and International Schools
      • Special Needs
      • Indoor & Outdoor Playgrounds
      • Paediatrics
      • Neonatal Care
    • Forum
    • ASKQ
    • Register
    • Login

    In-law problems?

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Relationships
    5.3k Posts 331 Posters 1.4m Views 1 Watching
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • J Offline
      janet88
      last edited by

      If in-laws spoil the kids, then have to sit down with hubby to explain the importance of building foundation and get him to tell his parents to stay out of the way. Of course there are some who will not want to listen…always saying ‘Aiyah, only P1. What’s the big deal?’ Kids are very smart, when they have 靠山, sure to take advantage.

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • B Offline
        baglady
        last edited by

        janet_lee88:
        If in-laws spoil the kids, then have to sit down with hubby to explain the importance of building foundation and get him to tell his parents to stay out of the way. Of course there are some who will not want to listen...always saying 'Aiyah, only P1. What's the big deal?' Kids are very smart, when they have 靠山, sure to take advantage.

        Yeah even as babies, they know who they can bully!

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • J Offline
          janet88
          last edited by

          baglady:
          janet_lee88:

          If in-laws spoil the kids, then have to sit down with hubby to explain the importance of building foundation and get him to tell his parents to stay out of the way. Of course there are some who will not want to listen...always saying 'Aiyah, only P1. What's the big deal?' Kids are very smart, when they have 靠山, sure to take advantage.


          Yeah even as babies, they know who they can bully!

          Oh yes, of course. If carried whole day, then parents will have hard time at home with the bb.

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • M Offline
            Mum Lim
            last edited by

            How to tell pils that parents are the ones whom decide their future?

            NOT PILS making the CALL....
            😢 😢 Its difficult to do so...
            Hopefully a miracle will appear soon 🙏

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • J Offline
              janet88
              last edited by

              Mum Lim:
              How to tell pils that parents are the ones whom decide their future?

              NOT PILS making the CALL....
              😢 😢 Its difficult to do so...
              Hopefully a miracle will appear soon 🙏
              Rather hard for wives to get this point across to them...rather sensitive. Get the husbands to tell. Someone has to do the dirty job for the sake of children's future.

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • M Offline
                Mum Lim
                last edited by

                Why cant dil tell pils straight? Why mothers and daughters can say anything and the next day all angry words will be forgotten??

                Till now it's Like fighting a losing war... 😢

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • L Offline
                  LOLMum
                  last edited by

                  Mum Lim:
                  Why cant dil tell pils straight? Why mothers and daughters can say anything and the next day all angry words will be forgotten??

                  Till now it's Like fighting a losing war... 😢

                  not all mum and daughter are like that. even if all is forgotten and forgiven, words still hurt.

                  because pils are not the dil's parents. no matter how much pils love the dil, even if their own son is the monster in the marriage, they will still be on his side especially when it comes to $$$, child custody etc. blood is thicker than water.

                  you are not fighting a losing war just a long long endles war till one party drops dead. (sorry for sounding so ..................).

                  dont lose heart.

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • J Offline
                    janet88
                    last edited by

                    LOLMum:
                    Mum Lim:

                    Why cant dil tell pils straight? Why mothers and daughters can say anything and the next day all angry words will be forgotten??

                    Till now it's Like fighting a losing war... 😢

                    because pils are not the dil's parents. no matter how much pils love the dil, even if their own son is the monster in the marriage, they will still be on his side especially when it comes to $$$, child custody etc. blood is thicker than water.

                    you are not fighting a losing war just a long long endles war till one party drops dead. (sorry for sounding so ..................).

                    PILs are not the DIL's biological parents...so they won't side with her. This proverb about blood thicker than water is very true. When it comes to sensitive issues esp, they will ALWAYS side the son.
                    Donkey years back, I was told to continue working after getting married so that HER son won't be suffering from having to support the family :x

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • DesertWindD Offline
                      DesertWind
                      last edited by

                      Mum Lim:
                      How to tell pils that parents are the ones whom decide their future?

                      NOT PILS making the CALL....
                      😢 😢 Its difficult to do so...
                      Hopefully a miracle will appear soon 🙏
                      Hi Mum Lim,

                      Although you did not elaborate on what sort of decisions your PILs decide for your kids, sounds serious if you feel so helpless.

                      It is time to be more firm yourself if you feel very strongly about it. For eg. if it is about schools, parents register their kids themself right? So you just go ahead to register at the school of your choice lah, not your PILs!

                      Not sure what other decision you are talking about. If you can share perhaps we can give our opinion.

                      No matter what you have to be very polite with PILs but if it is very crucial I won't hesitate to \"tell them off\" because sometimes hard to control my emotions.

                      😉

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • J Offline
                        janet88
                        last edited by

                        DesertWind:
                        Mum Lim:

                        How to tell pils that parents are the ones whom decide their future?

                        NOT PILS making the CALL....
                        😢 😢 Its difficult to do so...
                        Hopefully a miracle will appear soon 🙏

                        It is time to be more firm yourself if you feel very strongly about it. For eg. if it is about schools, parents register their kids themself right? So you just go ahead to register at the school of your choice lah, not your PILs!

                        Not sure what other decision you are talking about. If you can share perhaps we can give our opinion.

                        No matter what you have to be very polite with PILs but if it is very crucial I won't hesitate to \"tell them off\" because sometimes hard to control my emotions.
                        😉

                        To me, as long as it involves my kids, I will get hubby to see my point. If need be, have to tell them off if nice tone doesn't work.

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0

                        Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.

                        Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.

                        With your input, this post could be even better 💗

                        Register Login
                        • 1
                        • 2
                        • 260
                        • 261
                        • 262
                        • 263
                        • 264
                        • 528
                        • 529
                        • 262 / 529
                        • First post
                          Last post



                        Online Users

                        Recent Topics
                        New to the KiasuParents forum? Tips and Tricks!
                        How do you maintain your relationship with your spouse?
                        Budgeting for tougher times ahead. What's yours?
                        SkillsFuture + anything related to upskilling/learning something new!
                        My girl keeps locking her door. And I don't like it
                        How much do you spend on the kids' tuition/enrichments?
                        DSA 2026
                        PSLE Discussions and Strategies

                        Statistics

                        4

                        Online

                        210.5k

                        Users

                        34.1k

                        Topics

                        1.8m

                        Posts
                          About Us Contact Us forum Terms of Service Privacy Policy