In-law problems?

[janet88]

When I complained to him about his mother earlier, he got unhappy. Blood thicker than water mah. Good lah, now his father keeps calling him for money until he got fed-up. His wife, yours truly here, doesn’t call him during office hours unless it is urgent.


I couldn’t be bothered with them. They eat economy rice everyday and wash the styrofoam boxes to reuse. Like those construction workers…eat rice with minimal side dishes so as to save the money for cigarettes and beer.

Hubby also gave up on them. He advised his mother to cut down on smoking and she told him, ‘I rather die than cut down smoking’. Ok lor, if that is what she wants.

[Blessedwife]

janet_lee88:

When I complained to him about his mother earlier, he got unhappy. Blood thicker than water mah. Good lah, now his father keeps calling him for money until he got fed-up. His wife, yours truly here, doesn't call him during office hours unless it is urgent.


I couldn't be bothered with them. They eat economy rice everyday and wash the styrofoam boxes to reuse. Like those construction workers...eat rice with minimal side dishes so as to save tDhe money for cigarettes and beer.

Hubby also gave up on them. He advised his mother to cut down on smoking and she told him, 'I rather die than cut down smoking'. Ok lor, if that is what she wants.

Yes blood is thicker than water. I know if I were to talk bad about his family hubby won't be happy too so I just keep quiet or just cOmplaint to my own family.

[Pinky Piglet]

Ya normally hubby do not like to hear us complaining abt their mum normally I vent my frustration here or shared with my mum or close friends…

[Funz]

Pinky Piglet:

Hi all


Everytime when my mil want to go for holiday she will always asked my mum to help look after my kids... Everytime she come back with goodies she will know to give some to neighbour , bil , sil but not my mum. It made me pissed it's not that I greedy over her goodies shouldn't she show gratitude towards my mum for helping otherwise how can my hubby and I go to work

Maybe buying some goodies for your mum as a form of courtesy, yes. But not as gratitude towards your mum for helping look after your kids right?

No offense hor. Just find it strange that you think your MIL should be grateful for your mum helping to look after your kids.

[Pinky Piglet]

Hi

Not offended not to worry! It’s just that Everytime she will remember to distribute goodies to my 左邻右舍 and not my mum… My mum is just doing me and mil a favor in order to let her go travelling and me to go work in peace…Everytime she will ask my mum to help if u cannot take leave to fulfilled her travelling wishes but not to forget my mum don’t owe her anything

[Pinky Piglet]

And my mum health is not in tip top condition… My mil act like one governess at home everyone must follow the way she does her house chores like everything age is right and we are wrong … And she like to trumpet to others issue pertaining to what happen at home imagine my neighbour in next Blk also will get to know I changed my job etc

[Funz]

I know getting along with ILs is not easy.


Firstly, you are lucky that your MIL is willing to help you look after your child. Yes, her wanting to travel will upset your schedule somewhat and secondly you are lucky you have a mother who is also willing to help. No one owes anyone anything, I guess, everyone is helping where help is needed. This is your child, their grandchild, they are doing this for a loved one, not some stranger, so no need to say who owe who.

Just hoping you can see the more positive side and not be so unhappy about the situation.

[Pinky Piglet]

Hi funz


I am trying my very best to be positive! It’s a long long story … Anyway I try to think of her good points at times too vut sometimes she is just being too much… When I first give birth to my dd she told me not to let my hubby change her soiled diaper she said give birth to bb gal is very dirty and when my gal will whine before she napoed she will always said how u give birth huh give birth to one who always like to whine as she compare btwn my nephew and my dd… My nephew was a easy bb as compared to my dd then she will passes comment like u eat "dead chicken intestine" in hokkien when u are expecting is it? And when my gal was admitted to hospital she will say who ask her to fall sick … At times when dd or ds has difficulty in taking medicine when they were young she will say next time fall sick no need to see doctor eat "shit" instead since they refuse to cooperate during eating medicine time … N a lot more … I myself is trained in early childhood and I work in this industry and I find that whatever she said to my kids are not acceptable and I feel that it will demoralised their self esteem and ego…sigh! I know I have to be positive and thankful for her to take care of my kids but its easier said than done as we are staying together for nearly 12 years… There is always a limit to my patience you know

[Fun fun]

I’ve stayed with my mil for more than ten years! It wasn’t easy all the time, but in all relationship you just have to give n take. As she gets older, her health is deteriorating, her mood is like 3 days wind, 4 days rain. After a long day at work, I have to make sure I enquire about her day/health and administer her medication or giving her a massage. However, I must say when I complained about my aches, she will also apply some medicated oil for me. So, thinking back, she’s not too bad.

[LOLMum]

My mil went home this am with my dh.


She was shocked to see us quarreled (a few times quite bad) n hen I apologized to her for the shock she had, she kept quiet n just stroked my hands....made me cried n cried....

Guess she also know her son is not an easy peron to live with
But what to do.... We still love each other :love:

Me also at fault...so gotta change...