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    In-law problems?

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    • S Offline
      SAHM Chew
      last edited by

      We did buy medical n accident policies for PIL, n the premiums are all paid by DH for the past 10 yrs. SIL did not even volunteer to pay n DH never wanted to ask as he was afraid to sour their relationship.

      mommylow:
      When it comes to money issues, the paying part is quite standard for us be it my own mom or my in-laws. We split the cost among all the siblings.

      I have seen cases of siblings quarreling over whose is to pay for parents' hefty medical bills. So i did one smart thing. I proposed buying health insurance for my in-laws to my DH's siblings. I told my sil n bil to spilt the premium cost with DH using cash n medisave. I told them it's only fair that they do their part as parents belong to them too. They agreed without qualms, so I think it is still quite okay when it comes to money issues like who's paying. The health and medical insurance was bought for in-laws primarily to avoid future money issues among their children especially if medical bills are large. You never know how ugly people will turn into when it comes to pay big sums of money. If indeed anything happens, the insurance company will take over the cost, so DH and sil n bil won't have a chance to quarrel over money issues.

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      • M Offline
        mommylow
        last edited by

        SAHM Chew:
        janet_lee88:

        No worries, contentedSAHM.

        I have an idiotic SIL too...so I understand completely where you are coming from. That sister of his literally climbs on top of his head.

        My sil is not that bad, although she stay with me, but i do not see her everyday. She went to work early in the morning, my DH sent her to work, n fetch her back fm work every day (diff location) for the past 10 yrs.
        The only thing is when we go out with PIL to restaurants, she will not offer to pay. So every restaurant trip per week, DH has to pay at least $150. n she will not share the cost too. I am a SAHM, n i find it so hard to manage the finance, squeezeing here n there :nailbite: n still hv to cater $600 per mth for PIL. Cant she share some of the cost? N for those bigger cost, eg, mosquito neting for the whole house, DH has to pay the cost of it too. When PIL go overseas, DH had to pay for their trip too....she did not contibute at all.
        SIL can go oversea every yr... This yr, 2 weeks to china, last yr, 2 weeks to europe..... But DH n i cant afford to go on holiday... :mad: I am not trying to be difficult, but since she is working too, n not married, she can at least share the cost right?
        How i envy those who dont live with their PIL, SIL.... I regret not buying my own hse 10 yrs ago, n can never buy another house until PIL are not around... :sad:
        I am so streesful that PIL may outlived me :rotflmao:



        Your SIL is clearly the 拌猪吃老虎 type. She just acts blur and shirk responsibilities. Tell her in the face to be mature. She has to do her part too so long she is earning her own keep. Parents belong to her too.

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        • S Offline
          SAHM Chew
          last edited by

          Mommylow,


          If DH does not even want to say, what else can i say :sad: ... SIL is older than DH...... But still behave like that :roll:

          mommylow:
          SAHM Chew:

          [quote=\"janet_lee88\"]No worries, contentedSAHM.
          I have an idiotic SIL too...so I understand completely where you are coming from. That sister of his literally climbs on top of his head.

          My sil is not that bad, although she stay with me, but i do not see her everyday. She went to work early in the morning, my DH sent her to work, n fetch her back fm work every day (diff location) for the past 10 yrs.
          The only thing is when we go out with PIL to restaurants, she will not offer to pay. So every restaurant trip per week, DH has to pay at least $150. n she will not share the cost too. I am a SAHM, n i find it so hard to manage the finance, squeezeing here n there :nailbite: n still hv to cater $600 per mth for PIL. Cant she share some of the cost? N for those bigger cost, eg, mosquito neting for the whole house, DH has to pay the cost of it too. When PIL go overseas, DH had to pay for their trip too....she did not contibute at all.
          SIL can go oversea every yr... This yr, 2 weeks to china, last yr, 2 weeks to europe..... But DH n i cant afford to go on holiday... :mad: I am not trying to be difficult, but since she is working too, n not married, she can at least share the cost right?
          How i envy those who dont live with their PIL, SIL.... I regret not buying my own hse 10 yrs ago, n can never buy another house until PIL are not around... :sad:
          I am so streesful that PIL may outlived me :rotflmao:



          Your SIL is clearly the 拌猪吃老虎 type. She just acts blur and shirk responsibilities. Tell her in the face to be mature. She has to do her part too so long she is earning her own keep. Parents belong to her too.[/quote]

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          • M Offline
            mommylow
            last edited by

            SAHM Chew, another way to deal with sil is to make her pay for other things instead. You can also squeeze DH to pay for more of you and your family's needs so he does not have extra spare cash to pay for In-laws's minor spendings and sil will have no choice but to take over.


            Sometimes, I suspect that when our DH has excessive money on hand, (not forgetting the wives help to scrimp and save) they tend to be overly generous towards their family side, acting like Santa Claus giving and paying for everything. :roll:

            Strangely, they don't give as much to wifey's parents and siblings.

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            • S Offline
              SAHM Chew
              last edited by

              Hmm, my DH always pay the restaurants bills using credit card, n at the end of the mth, the bill will come to me as i am issueing cheque to pay for the cc bills. N where to get the money to pay? It come fm my monthly hsehold $ :sad: n DH still gives MIL $1k per mth for spending $.... 🤷


              SIL always complain she do not have spare $ , but goes for hotel stay in sg 3-4 times a yr... :rant:

              mommylow:
              SAHM Chew, another way to deal with sil is to make her pay for other things instead. You can also squeeze DH to pay for more of you and your family's needs so he does not have extra spare cash to pay for In-laws's minor spendings and sil will have no choice but to take over.

              Sometimes, I suspect that when our DH has excessive money on hand, (not forgetting the wives help to scrimp and save) they tend to be overly generous towards their family side, acting like Santa Claus giving and paying for everything. :roll:

              Strangely, they don't give as much to wifey's parents and siblings.

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • janet88J Offline
                janet88
                last edited by

                Mine here is the youngest…the ultimate spoilt. She thinks my hubby is at her beck and call. Actually that hubby of mine has been bullied for long time…as long as it doesn’t involve ME, KIDS or anything I have a share in, I don’t care.

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                • MMMM Offline
                  MMM
                  last edited by

                  I wonder if we should start to educate all our kids (boys and girls) that they have equal responsibility during our old age :?

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                  • V Offline
                    verykiasumummy
                    last edited by

                    3Boys:
                    mommylow:

                    [quote=\"verykiasumummy\"]

                    worse still, dh sides with them...!!

                    Son will always side with his own parents. Filial piety. It will probably take a lifetime if we want to make DH change sides.

                    Come to think if it, we also want our DCs to take sides with us rite?

                    Ummm.....no. Married is married, loyalty is to the spouse. (In a fair way of course)[/quote]ya i also think loyalty is to the spouse... isnt that all that was sworn in the wedding vow?? since when mil was ever in the vow??

                    \"i now pronounce u as my wife, together with my mother. we shall all be together living in harmony, in poor or rich, in health or sick.... blah blah blah..\"

                    red words are added now...

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                    • V Offline
                      verykiasumummy
                      last edited by

                      MMM:
                      I wonder if we should start to educate all our kids (boys and girls) that they have equal responsibility during our old age :?

                      my parents nv taught me about that but i think its all about our own mindset... even to teach my dc now, they may forget when they are old...

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                      • janet88J Offline
                        janet88
                        last edited by

                        If I am married to his mother, doesn't that mean HE is also married to my mother??? :rotflmao:

                        Do not wish to have my happy days ruined by them...hubby said his sister and the family may be coming back for a visit again...asked him what for? To remind mother to sell their flat and make sure she has a share? Shame on her...eyeing parents only asset. She and her angmoh husband are like vultures. When they came back last year and stayed at parents place...they didn't fork out a single cent. Instead, got a skin thick enough to ask hubby to buy them ALL (6 people) breakfast on weekends :mad:

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