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    All About Autism

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Special Needs & Learning Difficulties
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    • D Offline
      Double E
      last edited by

      Social rules means for example, in a game with children, the kids will probably set some rules like who go first, who do what. He is not able to follow.


      However, he is able to follow adults’ instructions.

      My son attends ST, OT and EIPIC at different private therapy centres.

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • N Offline
        Niu2009
        last edited by

        Double E:
        Social rules means for example, in a game with children, the kids will probably set some rules like who go first, who do what. He is not able to follow.


        However, he is able to follow adults' instructions.

        My son attends ST, OT and EIPIC at different private therapy centres.
        Hi Doulbe E,
        Thanks for answer. I was so stressful now. Even only the social problem, he may be AS. I don't know what to do next. I saw a lot of concerns about the child study in the main stream school. They are bullied and no friends++. Heartbroken!

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        • N Offline
          not on facebook
          last edited by

          Hi mummies, wanted to get your views on possible solutions for this-


          My Aspie son seems to be very ok at home. He listens to the helper, does his work, and is generally well-behaved, even calls me on the hp to ask stuff and ask when I’m coming home from work etc. But the moment he goes to his grandpa’s house, all hell breaks loose. He’ll start sticking to his grandpa like glue, throws tantrums until I come home from work, starts beating his grandparents when they tell him to stop it. When I call him when he’s there he will refuse to come to the phone, and I can hear him throwing full blown tantrums. I suspect that this arose because when he was younger I was staying with my parents, and every night he slept with them. Later on I moved to my own place, and I had to pull him away from them. In the beginning I sent him to my parents daily, but his tantrums are so major I’ve started only sending him there weekly. I’ve tried asking him why, and he cant give me a reason for his tantrums. Before he goes he’ll assure me that he’ll behave, but once he’s there it’s a different story.

          Wondering if any other parents go thru this? And any possible solutions for him to start behaving himself there the way he behaves at home? Thanks

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          • D Offline
            Double E
            last edited by

            My son is the opposite. He behaves better when he is with my mum.

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • N Offline
              not on facebook
              last edited by

              Double E:
              My son is the opposite. He behaves better when he is with my mum.

              Is he with your mum daily?

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              • N Offline
                nugget
                last edited by

                not on facebook,


                My son is very well behave in front of my mum, but will throw tantrums in front of my MIL.

                Even though they are special needs, they are just like any regular kids, they know who they can bully, and who do not take their nonsense.

                I will ask him if he likes going to grandparents house or not. If he say yes, then I will tell him I can only send him there if he do this this and behave like a good boy. Set rules with him. End of the day evaluate with him. I will purposely ask in front of grandparents if DS behave or not… if grandparents say yes… then I will praise him and reward him accordingly.
                If not, I will ask what things he did wrong then we go home and I will talk to him about it.

                If he doesnt like to go grandparents house, then need to find out why. Cos if he dun like to go, no point sending him there… else sure will throw tantrum…

                Just how 2 cents worth.

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                • N Offline
                  not on facebook
                  last edited by

                  nugget:
                  not on facebook,


                  My son is very well behave in front of my mum, but will throw tantrums in front of my MIL.

                  Even though they are special needs, they are just like any regular kids, they know who they can bully, and who do not take their nonsense.

                  I will ask him if he likes going to grandparents house or not. If he say yes, then I will tell him I can only send him there if he do this this and behave like a good boy. Set rules with him. End of the day evaluate with him. I will purposely ask in front of grandparents if DS behave or not.. if grandparents say yes.. then I will praise him and reward him accordingly.
                  If not, I will ask what things he did wrong then we go home and I will talk to him about it.

                  If he doesnt like to go grandparents house, then need to find out why. Cos if he dun like to go, no point sending him there.. else sure will throw tantrum..

                  Just how 2 cents worth.
                  Thanks nugget.. it's not that he doesnt like to go, he actually looks forward to going.. he's all excited when I tell him he's going. Then after tht.. haiyoh..
                  Anyways I will continue talking to him about it. Hope it will be effective sooner or later 😞

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                  • af7680A Offline
                    af7680
                    last edited by

                    Dear mummies


                    do you know any baker contact who can bake gluten free dairy free egg free birthday cake for my son?

                    my son is going to be 3 yr old soon and as he is attending cc in the morning, i would like to prepare a cake which he actually can eat with the rest of classmates for his birthday party.
                    he is allergic to many foods - wheat, dairy, egg, banana, etc…
                    last year we celebrated his 2 yr bd at CC with normal BD cake which he cant eat. so he just blew a candle ,sat and watching other kids eating it.
                    now he is more aware and he likes to eat things that other people eat, i would like to try to find a cake that he also can eat…

                    thank you.

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                    • N Offline
                      nugget
                      last edited by

                      af7680:
                      Dear mummies


                      do you know any baker contact who can bake gluten free dairy free egg free birthday cake for my son?

                      my son is going to be 3 yr old soon and as he is attending cc in the morning, i would like to prepare a cake which he actually can eat with the rest of classmates for his birthday party.
                      he is allergic to many foods - wheat, dairy, egg, banana, etc...
                      last year we celebrated his 2 yr bd at CC with normal BD cake which he cant eat. so he just blew a candle ,sat and watching other kids eating it.
                      now he is more aware and he likes to eat things that other people eat, i would like to try to find a cake that he also can eat...

                      thank you.

                      Why not order a agar agar cake for him instead?
                      I assume gluten free cakes are very expensive and not so nice to eat.

                      I have ordered from there before:
                      http://www.cakestory.com.sg/products-page/agar-agar-cake/

                      Their agar agar cake are very nice.. Got many cartoons characters too.

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                      • B Offline
                        Blokus
                        last edited by

                        Www & niu 2009


                        I think we are on the same page. Just to share my own journey to see if you can
                        Relate too.

                        My son too communicates well with us at home, share his thoughts, ask questions etc, play appropriately and all. But doesn't talk to peers at school. I was also quite concerned and sent him for review. Dr felt he was either a very very mild case or it's simply he's personality.

                        I sent him for social class while waiting for the test. I observe the other aspie kids, I just felt my son was more 'normal' (sorry for the lack of better word) than the rest. There also a number whom didn't look like they are on the spectrum. I spoke to some of their mothers and realised their kids have some classics symptoms which outsiders may not see it. That's when it hit me that my son has never shown any sign of autism. From birth he didn't do things like spinning wheels, lining things or have a
                        Fix interest in certain toys and not any other classic signs.

                        I was eventually more or less convinced that my son choose not to talk with peers rather than not knowing how to etc. Some of the things he can do
                        1) he has theory of mind. He knows his mind is his own and others have their own thoughts. He knows if we are in diff room he has to come out to me if he wants to talk to me.
                        2) he's socially aware and clearly understands social expectations.
                        3) although he plays with very very few friends, but he has proven that he can play with them. So its a matter of comfort zone for him. He can play games like board games & card games with the other kids, taking turns and follow rules etc.
                        4) although sometimes he keeps very quiet with other peers I note that he isn't socially withdrawn. It's quite clear he knows what the other kids are doing but decides not to join them. To me it was being reserve more than withdrawn.
                        5) when play, he's very eager to share his imaginary world with us, telling us this & that etc. he gives us feedback sharing with us what he sees etc.
                        6) school wise; he could sit still in class, following every instruction given to him. Participating as part of the class & has never been caught walking around doing his own thing.
                        7) it's not like he can't communicate with his peers. If I force him, he can carry out a small talk with peers.

                        I return to the development dr and shared all these. She agreed with me that my son is most likely not on the spectrum. So we decided to put off the test.

                        I hope I'm don't come across as justifying why my son is not on the spectrum. I'm
                        Just sharing my journey. How I come to a conclusion that my son is probably not on the spectrum. And maybe it may enlighten one of you too? Because I understand it can be quite a frustrating journey. It was very much for me. It took me one year of asking myself, husband, drs (pd & development drs), therapists, reading & reading & talking to other moms, to reach to this stage. I hope by sharing some of my pointers would relief some
                        Of you who's worried. Admittedly I am not 100% certain he's not on the spectrum. I've come to accept that even he is, I should be thankful its very mild and he can function mainstream. So, don't be too upset or hard on yourselves. Try to see this whole journey more positively. 🙂

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