Changes In Children

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

Thanks Flametree, so far i think you offer the most possible root-cause


I hope the steps I outlined earlier will work.

Now that school has started, the homework and school activities will help her to 'shift gear' too I hope.

[human]

Hi all,


I have been taking care of my nephew since young… Noticed he exhibit the avoidance behaviour when it comes to studies 2nd half of last year, P2 then. Bickering too. He has fear of not doing well, but did not channel that to work hard, avoid instead. If there are any useful parenting workshop, please recommend.

Thanks!!

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

So avoidance does happen at anytime as long as one does not like what one is doing and has the option to avoid.


Under such circumstance, can we:
1. exert authority to cut-off the option for avoidance?
2. engage in the same activity with the person who wants to avoid that particular activity?
3. seek professional help? Child psychologist?
4. school counsellor?
5. provide more relax/rest time?
6. allow the person to enjoy what he enjoys doing? (but for how long?)
7. let it be?Just accept and live with it? (wait for the child to out grow the problem?)

Well, there are so many factors and what-if in my mind too. Please if anyone can offer some suggetsions I think both Human and I would deeply appreciate it.

[flametree]

Hi Bear.w.me,


I suggest have a good heart to heart talk with her. choose an appropriate timing when she’s relax and receptive. tell her your concern. Maybe you can make up story like: " when she was younger, she loves to play hide and seek. and very often she thinks that as long as she covers her eyes and doesn’t see you, you will not be able to see her. But in reality, you are right in front of her."

so in the same manner, now by avoiding, she can’t hide from the reality that she’ll be sitting for psle this yr. she’ll need to face the challenge but she will not be facing it alone as mom and dad will definitely help her pull through this stressful period - just like what you did for her jie jie.

hope it helps. good luck.

flametree

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

Hi Flametree,


Nice to hear from you again.
On Sunday, I was with her in the afternoon (sacrificing my nap) and we discussed points to be considered for her Chinese composition (I did this before its just that now I allowed her to speak more).

After that, I can see:
- that she felt more assured to do her work
- take ownership to finish the composition by herself
- she showed some sense of achievement

I felt great too.

[corneyAmber]

Congrats Bear.w.me! you are making progress.

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

Thanks ks2me. I really touches me to know that you are still following my plight.


I will certainly continue to work on it.

[Andaiz]

Bear.w.me, your sacrifice of nap has been worth it eh?


Take heart...and listen to DD. Sometimes, it's really all that they need - to know that in spite of all the changes in their lives, mummy (and daddy) are still there for them.

:celebrate: jia you!

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

Yes Andaiz, it is definitely worth it. Thanks.

[corneyAmber]

Bear.w.me:

Thanks ks2me. I really touches me to know that you are still following my plight.


I will certainly continue to work on it.

You are :welcome:. We are all parents so we share all similar concerns. I you find the complete solution to the issue soon. Keep going!! We support you.

Btw, have you considered introducing your kid to this forum to get some boosting from the aunties like buds and uncles like zack? The energy here may do her good as I see a few very motivated kids around with their parents.