Boyfriend / Girlfriend

[mrswongtuition]

If your child can get his/her priorities straight, I think parents should be open about it.


If you find out about it, don’t flare up. It’ll shut them off further. Instead, talk to them about dating, underage sex and the consequences.

I always tell my students: they can keep the relationship from their parents, but they can’t run away from themselves. If the relationship sours, it affects more people than they think. Some are confident that nothing will happen but once they hear about real life experiences, they start to freak out.

I started dating during my sec sch days and I was in a girls’ school since P1. I started dating my hb when I was in S4. He was my pillar of support, my extra pair of hands during projects/revision. When I was stressed and frustrated, he kept me company and encouraged me. When I lost heart, he surprised me and pushed me to do well.

My hb is bf #8. BFs #1-7 were not supportive like my hb & I broke with them because I felt that they were affecting my studies.

My niece almost dropped out of school but her bf worked with her mum to push her to study hard. Her bf studied with her under her grandparent’s supervision, they stayed home for movies on DVD instead of going out dating and my niece eventually did well in her studies. He encouraged her alot when she was losing the battle to quit smoking.

Having a gf/bf can be good if your child knows his/her priorities. I knew my priority was to study and do well. But I did not want any emotional baggage that will affect that.

[daisyt]

Agree with mrswongtuition if your child can get his/her priorities straight. Not all kids know that and most of the time, they just want to try out BGR for fun. We parents, should know our kids well. If they are ready to start one, there is no reason we want to object, right ?

[2ppaamm]

Don’t know leh… but I’m still waiting for my kids to show signs…

[MMM]

Bear.w.me:

It seems like some problems are generic.


My When I queried about it, she just mentioned just normal friend but I put her in a girls only school!! Sigh...

Does she go for enrichment classes? Could she have known the boys from those places???

My Sec 3 niece is also from all girls school since primary school. I am her FB friend and observed that she seems to have alot of \"boy\" friends who would tease her and comment on her post. They appeared to be from the enrichment classes. I know she is of the age of having crushes. Haha just got to monitor. It's normal to be curious. But so long as they don't do the wrong thing, it's fine.

I passed by a tuition centre yesterday and saw those teenagers. 2 boys saw another 2 girls they said hello. After that the guy whispered something to the friend. With the \"gel up hair\", it's obviously the looking good age. I thought to myself what would I do when my kids are that age?

I will probably encourage them to bring friends home (including boys). Tell them it's normal to have crushes or admire someone. But imagine if they were to go into a relationship now, it might not last and they will end up hating each other for life :? So be good friends first and then if you are still great friends after so many years, it's probably time to go 1 step further???? :lol: I don't know if this works maybe by then, my daughter would tell me that, \"you made me miss the boat!!!\".

Well... for us who have gone through this stage and other stages in life, actually it's all about fate. Meeting the person who is just right for you. He need not be the coolest and most handsome guy. He just need to be the one who suits you.

[Bear.014745w.014745me]

Hi MMM, yes upon further investigation (i spare the details here, don’t ask).


It seems like she knows the boy through tuition class. OMG…

Now both parents are trying to instill some Jumpstart BGR lectures and what-not etc…(亡羊补牢, 为时不晚?) but final intention is to talk her out of it. We hope she’ll drown in CCAs and homework/studies deep into the school term later.

One more question to everyone here is: do you allow your children to write blog on the net? I personally never like the idea of exposing one’s face, life, and thoughts at a tender age. What about you?

[mrswongtuition]

Bear.w.me:

One more question to everyone here is: do you allow your children to write blog on the net? I personally never like the idea of exposing one's face, life, and thoughts at a tender age. What about you?

Blogs are alright as long as:
- No personal photos posted if it's a public blog
- No names mentioned (use initials only)
- Understand the consequences of posting something online (it can lead to legal prosecution, so need to be very careful)
- No cyber-bullying/name-calling
- No bad-mouthing teachers/parents/family/friends/schoolmates/ANYONE
- No personal information given (no mention of which school, which area they live in, which bus they take home or which MRT station they are alighting at, etc)

Gives them an outlet to express themselves. Maybe you can encourage a written journal/diary instead? Let her choose a fanciful one herself (with a budget limit of course). Helps to improve her writing at the same time

[lovejoypeacce]

Notr sure if this is the right forum but want to check with all parents how do you handle when your child starts showing signs of crushes on the opposite sex?


Do you object to it strongly finding ways and means to curb all opportunities of them seeing each other? Or do you encourage your child to go on group outing instead?

Do you put a stop to all the smses?

I don’t think at this point sitting down to talk about the disadvantages of starting anything is going to be entertained by your child.

Child is only in Sec 1.

[daisyt]

hi lovejoypeacce, you might want to refer to here

http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7837


Relax a bit ... you are not the only parent facing this problem. :lol:

[julongmum]

mrswongtuition:

Blogs are alright as long as:

- No personal photos posted if it's a public blog
- No names mentioned (use initials only)
- Understand the consequences of posting something online (it can lead to legal prosecution, so need to be very careful)
- No cyber-bullying/name-calling
- No bad-mouthing teachers/parents/family/friends/schoolmates/ANYONE
- No personal information given (no mention of which school, which area they live in, which bus they take home or which MRT station they are alighting at, etc)

Gives them an outlet to express themselves. Maybe you can encourage a written journal/diary instead? Let her choose a fanciful one herself (with a budget limit of course). Helps to improve her writing at the same time

Bear.w.me, I feel exactly the same way as you mentioned.

mrswongtuition, as adults we understand the cyber risk, as parents we understand the children though being warned of such risk, yet prone to the risk.

[VitoRelax]

daisyt:

hi lovejoypeacce, you might want to refer to here

http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7837


Relax a bit ... you are not the only parent facing this problem. :lol:

Common problem but yet tough one to tackle ...