Extra Marital Affair
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Funz:
yup - I don't step into their problems too....I was only thereMy believes, never actively step into another couple's problems. You can be there to lend a shoulder or moral support and all but the decision to forgive and work it out or not has to be made by the wife herself. And whatever her decision, just be there to support her when need be.
We cannot presume to know what is best for the couple, only they know for themselves.
The only time that I ever step in to actively tell someone to leave the guy was when the guy was abusive.
to provide my relative with moral support basically and also
a listening ear....at that point in time she was too distraught to
think straight as the \"other\" woman had come knocking
on her door.....
I told her whatever decision she is going to make, she has to
make sure she can live with it...... either for herself or for her kids.
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On a separate note, does anyone agree that at the end of the day, besides the religion aspect, it also boils down to the upbringing ie the teaching of values, morals, what is right or wrong etc that 'de-influences' (if there is such a word) from straying ... :? I mean only when in the first place, one has sound values, morals etc.. then one should be able to keep to one's marriage vows rite?? A vow can simply be a vow if one does not have strong morals/values upbringing. And being sound in those aspects does not necessarily equate one with being religious/pious??? Isn't that why the opposite sex is always finding reasons/excuses as to why they have strayed, simply because they cannot except the fact that they have done wrong.
When my then bf, now DH 'went to the dark side' as mentioned previously when overseas, I can't say that he cheated on me cuz we had an understanding that we could see others if we wanted to during the time he was away. Obviously I didn't lah
Anyway, after we sorted out our r/s issues and got married, he has managed to 'keep his vows'. And especially after we had our boy, he has gone all out to be a family man ie quit erratic hrs in partnership firm to get one which has regular hrs etc...
So now, as I am reading all the posts here, I am just wondering whether does the above point hold water as I have always felt that DH and his brothers were brought up well in a lot of ways.
Apologies if I sound a tad too naive or idealistic here. I am just penning my thoughts down cuz I am trying to understand the situation of EMAs here. -
Honestly… it boils down to how the well brought up person
rejects temptations flat out! Solely for the reason that it is
wrong. I’ve seen many many many brought up men and
women unable to smack temptations in the face. Esp when
their relationship suffers a crack or there are some un-said
un-acknowledged and un-resolved issues at the point the
temptation appears. It could be an EMA with someone they
once knew before marriage… cos it will be easier to bond
without having to learn about each other again… or it could
be someone new, desperate, eager and of course shameless
to begin with… who seeks out the stability in a well-incomed,
well-groomed, well-everything of a married man or woman…
To some, these are turn-on traits of a person they’d like to
have for themselves… so since they say, the best ones are
always either taken or married… then bo-pian wat. -
buds:
Hey buds,Honestly.. it boils down to how the well brought up person
rejects temptations flat out! Solely for the reason that it is
wrong. I've seen many many many brought up men and
women unable to smack temptations in the face. Esp when
their relationship suffers a crack or there are some un-said
un-acknowledged and un-resolved issues at the point the
temptation appears. It could be an EMA with someone they
once knew before marriage... cos it will be easier to bond
without having to learn about each other again... or it could
be someone new, desperate, eager and of course shameless
to begin with... who seeks out the stability in a well-incomed,
well-groomed, well-everything of a married man or woman..
To some, these are turn-on traits of a person they'd like to
have for themselves... so since they say, the best ones are
always either taken or married... then bo-pian wat.
sorri, can't respond now, have to log off. Do you mind reading my post again as I have edited it. -
does 'love' really exist for all matters???? :love:
betrayal.....hurt....truth....sex....trust...
all these are just pure English words
used at the wrong time, place & relationship....
why are temptations just so hard to resist??? :stupid: -
Scholar goody two shoes boy wonder Tiger
Woods is one fine good example. Nuff said.
I’m deeply saddened with stories of his trysts.
Though media has its ways of hitching up knots…
i’m just deeply saddened by what his gorgeous
babe of a wife had to endure after the scandal
came to light. Not to mention, swallowing the
bitter betrayal of her perfect husband who
did those sluts while doing her! :!:
For me, i begin to doubt the lame ending of
happily ever afters… that’s why they’re called
fairy tales. -
So difficult not to stray.....we are all human and in need of love for the soul beside food for the stomach.
Spirit is indeed willing but the flesh is weak in a moment only, if only the head speak louder than the heart.
Wifey have a big role in this situation here more than huby in many situaiton .... Ladies....not quite right but how to say in another way ....
Autumnbronze - I also dont understand why we need to have a side dish once in a while when there are milion and one thing we can do with our time other then creating trouble for ourself and the one we takw thw vow?
Isssit not good enough? and that we feel dry and want some excitement because thing get mundane ??
I doono how to write in Chinese ...but ....:
\"\" Ping Fun Ya Shi Ye Chong Xin Fu \"\" ......
I think what i have written only apply to some spectrum of people not all. I have seen some that just chose to put themselves in the position to stray and be tempted ....
Having said that I have just join KSP but there are at least in this kIasu Forum many many good hubby and wifey ..KUdos to all .... the children are in safe hands.........
Well said buds - your last post -
temptations are always there… depending how much can we resist? are we strong enough to uphold such temptions? most of the time our first thought is 'just try only, probably at no harm". just try… haha… that’s how we fall into deep hole and that is how curiosity kills a cat…
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baby2momma:
Why?
why are temptations just so hard to resist??? :stupid:
Because we forget why we got together in the first place.
Because we tend to take each other for granted.
Because we make light of the effort and the hardwork that we have put into our marriage.
Because we do not count our blessings
Because to many the vows are just a bunch of words written by god knows who. -
Funz:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Why?baby2momma:
why are temptations just so hard to resist??? :stupid:
Because we make light of the effort and the hardwork that we have put into our marriage.
Because to many the vows are just a bunch of words written by god knows who.
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