Home alone

[staxel]

Good suggestion CSC.

Will work on these suggestions.
Thanks

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

Hi staxel


The situation really depends on your child. How comfortable you are with him being at home alone. How well do you know your son friends, how close a relationship you have with your son & your son characteristic, likes & dislikes.

Have a long talk with your son on how he feels staying at home alone. What his activities are after school besides revising & doing homework. Youngsters tend to either hang around somewhere to chitchat, study together, doing school projects or just simply chill out. If home does not cater for privacy, they might seek public places instead.

Well, that was what I did during my secondary, jc & uni years. Favourite place is actually a home where parents are working, clean house with tidbits/finger food to eat. It's more comfortable than the shopping malls, library or any open areas & less costly.

You might want to give unscheduled calls daily to check if everything is alright (make it sound casual, caring rather than checking). Invites his close friends for weekend lunch or dinner (one of my colleague does that). Always be on the alert if you see there is any change in negative attitude in your son (that was the advise I've seen in tv on teen delinquent).

[staxel]

Hi EN,

Thank you very much.
Currently, I make it a point that he calls or I call to chit-chat with him. Daily, without fail, he would asks the same question like, "Mummy, where are you? What are you doing?" (even though he knows that I am in the office). I guess he is lonely and just wants to talk to me. I will try to talk to him and check on his feeling. (still cannot help but feel guilty). Sometimes, he would call to said that he is going cycling with so and so. Normally, I would allow him with advice to be careful.

Yes, good advice on inviting his friends over for dinner or for the weekend. Fully agreed that this is a good way to know the type of friends he is mixing with. Will sit down and discuss with him on all options and how we can work out a ‘timetable’ or understanding on how he intends to spent his days. Of course, if I can be around, to me, that is always the best deal. Many teens do not realise how blessed they are in having their mum around.

Thanks

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

Your welcome, staxel.


You might also want to be in contact with your son teacher for his extra eca/classes, enrichment etc. Let the teacher alert you if your son is missing from the required classes. A naughty kid once told me that permission form from school can easily be blanco, change the days/timing, then zap it for parents to sign. Trusting parents will just take note that their kid will be involve in camp/extra classes without realizing that it has been fabricated.

Depending on where you are staying, some places are favourite hang out by teenagers especially under the HDB void deck. Check out your surrounding area to ensure your kid is safe from bullies.

Besides inviting for lunch, my daughter told me that her friend parents invited some of her daughter’s classmate for a movie after exam is over. When I was young, my friend’s father picked us up from the stadium after our game of squash & treat us to Mac. Some throw a barbecue & invited their child’s friend & parents along for a get to know each other session.

My kids will soon be in the same boat (several more years to go). So, I will also welcome any suggestion that other parents might have.

[staxel]

Hmmm,


this is really an interesting insight into the teenage world.

will definitely try this out.

Thanks En.

[BlueBells]

I have the same worries, but my kid is only P3 next year. hahaha ... i am super kiasu .. :oops:


Anyway, I have gone one step further - I wrote in to MCYS, and propose they consider / conduct feasibility studies on setting up youth clubs catering to teenagers from 13 - 16 / 17. The idea is to have a supervised environment for the kids to study and bond with other teenagers of their age group, more like a supervised study room with lunch and shower facilities provided, actually. Dr Vivian B. replied they will explore this idea, but I am not even sure if it is in the works yet.

I am contemplating meeting the MP for my zone to propose this idea for him to bring it up another level .... should I?

[jzapple]

BlueBells:

I have the same worries, but my kid is only P3 next year. hahaha ... i am super kiasu .. :oops:


Anyway, I have gone one step further - I wrote in to MCYS, and propose they consider / conduct feasibility studies on setting up youth clubs catering to teenagers from 13 - 16 / 17. The idea is to have a supervised environment for the kids to study and bond with other teenagers of their age group, more like a supervised study room with lunch and shower facilities provided, actually. Dr Vivian B. replied they will explore this idea, but I am not even sure if it is in the works yet.

I am contemplating meeting the MP for my zone to propose this idea for him to bring it up another level .... should I?

That was a good idea ! I am also worried but I think that it is a trust between a parent and a child.

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

BlueBells wrote [quote]I am contemplating meeting the MP for my zone to propose this idea for him to bring it up another level .... should I?[/quote]
Good idea! Please do. My ds has started to stay at home for an hour or so. But once she hits secondary school, I'm planning to do what I advise earlier. I used to be home alone since P5. But, really it all depends on the child character.

[BlueBells]

jzapple,


I definitely trust my kids, it's their friends to be that I might not trust, which is where I worry the influence might come from, given that they will probably spend more time with her friends in due time.

EN,

Ya, I think I will act on it and look up the MP. The reason I am being so kiasu now is because I know things like these takes time to materialise. I want to allow time for it to happen to benefit my kids too.

Well, if parents who read my idea support it, maybe you can consider speaking to your respective MP too. Unity is strength. If there are many parents who root for the same idea across the island, it will be channel up via various MPs to the next level.

[jedamum]

Hm...a good 'business opportunity' for would-be entreprenuar....

how much will you be willing to pay?