All About Full-Time Maids

[riash]

wow, my maid eats after we eat and she eats whatever she wants to the extent she eats more than me and my hubby. my mom is also a good cook so she will eat even more if my mom cooks.


i guess i am unique as i leave my 2 kids with the maid and no one else is at home so i have to close my eyes to a lot of things in the hope that she is happy and will also care for my kids well.

today under her care, my ds1 bit my baby until blue black…how to deal with this?

[moonee]

Hi, do u allow yr helpers to keep the handphone or do u hold it in the day till she ask for it in the evening after work?

[qms]

lovekidsverymuch:

riash:

today under her care, my ds1 bit my baby until blue black....how to deal with this?

U need to strictly tell the maid to take care of the kids since thats her priority and if she sees them doing she should immediately make them apart or else call so that u can talk to DS1

Actually, I thought this should be the parents' job to teach the elder boy not to do such things to the baby? :?

If the maid really did what you suggested, would the elder boy complain to the parents? What would the parents do to the maid then? :?

[peapot]

My houserule is she’s not allowed to have any handphone. I find that once she has handphone, she will give alot of problems. We bought a handphone for one of my previous maid. She use the phone till 1am and

I m a light sleeper, I can hear her talking!! Then she starts using my housephone to cut down on her phone expenses. All her friends start calling my house! I was so mad!! So I tell myself, its enough!! No more hp for her.

Moonee, actually you can keep her hp and give it to her in the night.

[hquek]

lovekidsverymuch:

riash:

today under her care, my ds1 bit my baby until blue black....how to deal with this?

U need to strictly tell the maid to take care of the kids since thats her priority and if she sees them doing she should immediately make them apart or else call so that u can talk to DS1

Think also must make it clear that she cannot hit your child even if to discipline - unless this is something you dun mind her to do, and she won't be excessive.

[peapot]

I remembered my friend’s maid ask for transfer when she’s not allow to use hp at home. My friend was very firm and said "then you can go" and she was transferred out a week later! She’s the type of employer who doesn’t like to be hold ransom by maids! I can’t afford to be like her because I got no support at home! Sometimes I also need to close one eye to the maid’s doing.


My maid is an Indonesia and she doesn’t take pork. Although she can handle pork, she refuse to cook pork because she cannot eat. So, I also close one eye to it. Only my child got no pork to eat. I tolerate for 1 month plus until I can’t take it anymore. I told her nicely yesterday that she needs to cook eventhough she don’t eat because we are not muslim family and perhaps she may be better off working for a Malay family!! I already let her pray 5 times a day, what more she want??!! She wants to convert my family!!!??

[janet88]

I wonder if maids are here to work or to enjoy life. They suffer a fair bit during the training in Indonesia. Once selected to come, they go overboard. My maid dresses up even when we go IMM.


If they are not given handphones, they find opportunities to go downstairs to use public phones. If they have handphones, they yak or sms non-stop. If I allow them to use hp, they yak until wee hours of the morn and don’t get up at 6am.

As for food, I usually put aside some food for them and then we can finish up the rest. Whether they throw food away or not, we won’t know. Bcos of Indonesians not eating pork, every meal is mainly chicken.

Having a maid means you have to close BOTH eyes, esp those who are SAHM. As employers, we are literally at their mercy. Strict with them=either spit into our food or murder us. Lenient=climbing on top of our heads.

[hquek]

peapot:

Then she starts using my housephone to cut down on her phone expenses. All her friends start calling my house! I was so mad!! So I tell myself, its enough!! No more hp for her.

My maid uses the housephone to call her family (via phonecard). We've told her to courtesy inform us before she want to use even though no one is at home. She did that last weekend. And happily deleted ALL the numbers in caller id.

Now I'm left wondering why in the world she did that.....any number she dare not let us know? A bit worried that she'll call local numbers (international sure to show up) and chat the night away.

[qms]

lovekidsverymuch:

Its true that kid needs to be taught but then u know some times they might just do they wont realize the impact so some one which in this case is maid should take immediate step and thats why i said call up the employer to let her know of the situation

OK. This is an issue which we will have to agree to disagree because it's a difference in viewpoint.

I am not sure how old the elder boy is, but if we consistently teach the boy he should not treat his sibling in this manner, we are treating the root of the problem. We can't condone such behaviour, and expect the maid to stop the elder boy's behaviour. Teaching the elder boy goes a long way than telling the maid she should watch out for the boy's behaviour.

The key point here is to be consistent in teaching the elder boy (what happened to the elder boy if he bite his sibling again? The next time he bites his sibling again, does he get the same treatment?).

Of course I agree that the maid should also have pulled the elder boy aside and called the parents. Our recommendation shouldn't just stop there.

[janet88]

I used to buy Phoenix card ($8-$10) for my maids…they can yak for 1/2 hour regardless of peak or off-peak hours. I allow her to use my housephone so that I know where she is. Her family is NOT allowed to know my home number or handphone.


I brought my maids out each time I go out…then give her 1 hour to buy her stuff and have some air to breathe. The reason is bcos they have no off-days. They were appreciative in the beginning, after that they didn’t appear at the time I told them.