How to teach children to handle bullies

[RamblingMummy]

hi, my girl is only 2 but i do teach her to stand up against bullies. I believe that we need to teach our kids to stand up against bullies in order for them not to be victims of bullies. We will never be around all the time. In fact, teachers aren’t with our kids 24/7 either. Standing up against bullies is a lifeskill that our kids have got to learn.


I told my girl that if she does not like what the other person is doing or saying to her, then she’s got to tell that person to stop. In fact, I’ve seen her standing up for herself a number of times. Of course, if an older child is involved, then I will definitely step in.

[jiyou2003]

My DS is 7 and I saw this incident after his swimming class. He likes to stay a little longer to play water and he spotted two slightly older boys in the pool. There are from the same swimming class. So DS play with them. One of them pull my DS hair while the other one push his head under water. Those boys mother was standing and talking to other people. They didnt notice it. I quickly call to DS and ask him out of the pool. That boy pull DS hair again while he was crying and scolding that boy "stupid". Oh mine!

[pokemon]

i dont know if this is consider a bully. This boy who sit next to the ds demanded to use my ds color pencil. My ds brings along a normal 24color pack (nothing fanciful) and that boy has a 12 color pck. He as been using my ds colorpencil for a few days, till i noticed why the colorpencils are often broken. My ds said for the past few months, that boy has been changing different brands of colorpencil.


Yesterday, despite several warning from my ds, that boy ignored him and contd using my ds colorpencil, and my ds was also sillly :stupid: , allow him to use.

Today, i told ds to give that boy an ultimatum, if he contd to use, will get the teacher involve. Must check w ds later when u comes back. Apparently, this boy often told his frens, he staying in bungalow, have alot of money bt few weeks bk, he was reported by classmates for asking them for $. Teachers has informed his parents. I really think, money cant buy happiness ya!

[vlim]

Hi, I think some of you might be keen of the following link


http://www.bullyfreecampaign.sg/

[blackberrycck]

i think "bully" issues are the most difficult to solve…too sensitive already…

[PSLEtutor]

Are you being bullied?

An excellent ebook on Bully Prevention for parents, Students and teachers.
Ebook \"Stop Bully Now\" available online at http://StopBullyNow.org


http://stopbullynow.org/images/stopbullynow.jpg\">

[mumma_bear]

I find this very hard to manage since my DS is just 2 y.o. When he had experienced being bullied by a kid bigger than him, my son just looked straight to his eyes, i pitied my son that time. But I was proud that he didn’t cry at all…I scolded the older kid though. I’ve seen my son fighting back when he was bullied by his cousins. I guess he has a defensive attitude built within him although I’m still worried if worse comes to worst. Thanks for the topic!

[Littlefly]

Is it possible to teach our kids how to handle bullying from Nursey stage or Pre-K? such as how to teach our kid to process criticisim or handle envy…


Or this is part of growing up where they have to learn how to defend themselves ? but what if they are at such a tender age and does not know how to express ?

[Tutormummy]

Just would like to share my experience on how I taught my daughter, currently 8 years old to handle her first bully case 4 years ago.


When she was 4 years old in nursery, a girl kept hitting her. Initially I just told her to report it to the teacher, but thereafter the girl simply hit her when the teacher was not around. Finally, I told her to confront the girl directly and told her right in the face that she will hit back if she ever laid a finger on her again. The girl was taken aback by her sudden courage, and guess what, they became best friends.

I guess we have to teach the kids how to stand up for themselves as the teachers and parents cannot be constantly by their side to protect them. The "bully" will usually target the "weaker" kids who do not know how to stand up for themselves.

[cantbearit2]

sashimi:

Yeah lah, of course. But as far as I can tell, statistically and by actual experience, most bullies and troublemakers in school are male. It's a male thing... Hence, my (yes, one-sided) plea.

I second your plea.

My DD had always got bullied in CCC rite up to N2. I still remember during her playgroup years, there was 1 particular boy who always pick on her. She comes back home with bite marks, scratch and bruises on her hand and legs. :heartbroken:

We did feedback to her teacher. Luckily her teacher were pretty fast to catch on. They did explain to us that sometimes that boy is too fast for them to react (which we can understand). They were the ones who told us which boy it is and they have since kept a watchful eye on that boy. The boy's parents were also informed. Of course we did not kick up a big fuss given the boy's tender age.

We were shocked to learn from her teachers that this boy loves to SIT on my DD during nap time too :x (how naughty can boys be, I have a boy too ). Over time, under the teachers watchful eye, these incidents became remote.

By the time DD reaches K1, she became more verbal and made many friends in her CCC. There was no incident of any bullying, just the usual \"I don't friend so and so cos she blah blah blah....\". :lol: Kids will be kids.

So I guess with some \"experience\", they will eventually \"learn\" to handle bullies themselves. Of course, as parents we must always be there to guide them. I have never told DD \"an eye for an eye\" kind of theory (though I would very much love to, :rubhands:). I simply do not believe in taking revenge to resolve bullies issues. I just told her to scream and inform teachers. If possible, avoid close contact with this kid at all times.

I always believe what goes around comes around. Give these young \"bullies\" a second chance, especially if they are very young. Some may juz outgrow them and become Governors (hee....eg. Arnold Schwarzenneger). Through proper guidance and patience from parents (IM sure no parents wish their kid is a bully), these kids may just grow up to be gentlemen. Hope my DS will not grow up to be the one kena complain next time (he is 8 mths old now).