Me Time!
-
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2092210\" time=\"1671106410\" user_id=\"17023:
Is the life for blue collar workers and low skill workers really tough? I and DH are one of them but our life is not tough. :scratchhead: Of course, we are not stay in condominium and travel to Europe every year or going to dine in 5 Star Hotel every weekend. But we are happy and our life is good.
All good and well in an utopian society but we are living in the real world and reality bites.
I respect all jobs and I value everyone’s contributions but I am also realistic enough to know that life is very tough for the blue collar workers and lower skill workers.
So if given the choice, for a better future of my children, I (and many parents) choose to aim high so that they could have more options on how to live their lives. A solicitor who chooses to practise pro bono and not be a general counsel in a MNC has the freedom to live the life he wants while others may not even have the right to choose.
It seems that you still don't get my point. I am not saying that kids no need to study hard and struggle for excellent academic achievement. I want to state is the \"attitude or 心态\" towards study. If one going to school is to equip himself/herself with knowledge so that he or she can benefit the society and serve the country, then even he/she cannot get into the top schools or any professional field due to whatever reasons, they won't be sad and disappointed because they still can find other ways to serve the community. If one's aim for study is to climb up the ladders in society, earn lots of money so that can maintenance a high standard of living or some even just wanted to show others that they are superior to others....., then he/she will be under huge of pressure for studying under any type of education system because the desire for fame and wealth is uncontrolled. -
Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=\"2092230\" time=\"1671153093\" user_id=\"195250:[quote=\"Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=2092230 time=1671153093 user_id=195250]
You have 佛性 but as mere mortals we are usually motivated by less lofty factors.
Is the life for blue collar workers and low skill workers really tough? I and DH are one of them but our life is not tough. :scratchhead: Of course, we are not stay in condominium and travel to Europe every year or going to dine in 5 Star Hotel every weekend. But we are happy and our life is good.
It seems that you still don't get my point. I am not saying that kids no need to study hard and struggle for excellent academic achievement. I want to state is the \"attitude or 心态\" towards study. If one going to school is to equip himself/herself with knowledge so that he or she can benefit the society and serve the country, then even he/she cannot get into the top schools or any professional field due to whatever reasons, they won't be sad and disappointed because they still can find other ways to serve the community. If one's aim for study is to climb up the ladders in society, earn lots of money so that can maintenance a high standard of living or some even just wanted to show others that they are superior to others....., then he/she will be under huge of pressure for studying under any type of education system because the desire for fame and wealth is uncontrolled.[/quote]
If you tell a PSLE kid, “you need to do well in your studies so next time you can be a 有用的人，to benefit the society and serve the country!”, think a 10yo or 12yo can understand and relate to that? What you have written sounds great on paper but how many kids can be motivated by acquiring this type of 心态？Or is it easier to motivate kids to work hard by telling them if they do well in PSLE, they can get into their dream school as the school has the coding/robotics CCA they like?
Honestly, I do not think a lot of teens are able to use as a key motivation factor the desire to climb corporate ladder to maintain a certain lifestyle to do well in exams.
Don’t mind me saying, the way you put it, it reminds me of my mother. My mum pushed me to study hard, bought assessment books for me and sent me to tuition, but now she asks me not to stress my kids to study hard. This is very typical of a grandparent’s mindset. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2092239\" time=\"1671157102\" user_id=\"17023:
I and my DH have never pushed DS to study hard and force him to tuition. DS was interested in repairing electrical items when he was small and therefore he is now an Electrical Engineer.
You have 佛性 but as mere mortals we are usually motivated by less lofty factors.
If you tell a PSLE kid, “you need to do well in your studies so next time you can be a 有用的人，to benefit the society and serve the country!”, think a 10yo or 12yo can understand and relate to that? What you have written sounds great on paper but how many kids can be motivated by acquiring this type of 心态？Or is it easier to motivate kids to work hard by telling them if they do well in PSLE, they can get into their dream school as the school has the coding/robotics CCA they like?
Honestly, I do not think a lot of teens are able to use as a key motivation factor the desire to climb corporate ladder to maintain a certain lifestyle to do well in exams.
Don’t mind me saying, the way you put it, it reminds me of my mother. My mum pushed me to study hard, bought assessment books for me and sent me to tuition, but now she asks me not to stress my kids to study hard. This is very typical of a grandparent’s mindset.
How could you just jump to the conclusion that a 10 or 12 years old could not understand the important of benefit and serve his/her own country? If their parents are grassroots leaders and always doing volunteer work during weekend, then their kids may have the aspiration of serving the country. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2092239\" time=\"1671157102\" user_id=\"17023:
Jumping in here - I think 10-12 yo kids can have altruistic motives for studying and achieving. It doesn't mean that more immediate outcomes, like getting into a particular school, are not motivating. I think we do a disservice to children to think that they are not able to have bigger goals than just what affects them directly. But if they are taught to think more broadly and for others, they will be less disturbed by not achieving a specific goal.
You have 佛性 but as mere mortals we are usually motivated by less lofty factors.
If you tell a PSLE kid, “you need to do well in your studies so next time you can be a 有用的人，to benefit the society and serve the country!”, think a 10yo or 12yo can understand and relate to that? What you have written sounds great on paper but how many kids can be motivated by acquiring this type of 心态？Or is it easier to motivate kids to work hard by telling them if they do well in PSLE, they can get into their dream school as the school has the coding/robotics CCA they like?
Honestly, I do not think a lot of teens are able to use as a key motivation factor the desire to climb corporate ladder to maintain a certain lifestyle to do well in exams.
Don’t mind me saying, the way you put it, it reminds me of my mother. My mum pushed me to study hard, bought assessment books for me and sent me to tuition, but now she asks me not to stress my kids to study hard. This is very typical of a grandparent’s mindset.
I guess a lot depends on the parents - if a child has been exposed to more than just his own desires, and shown how he can use his own desires and interests for the good of society, they can be motivated by a combination of these factors. If parents use lifestyle and material success for the individual as the main aim, I suppose that's what kids will imbibe. Children will learn what their parents to model and teach, even if it is goes against the general thinking of that school, that social circle or even society at large.
\"Study hard\" means so many different things to different people - what \"hard\" to me is probably quite relaxed to some others, and vice versa. -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2092251\" time=\"1671162368\" user_id=\"28674:
Definitely there are 10-12yo kids with altruistic motives, but are they the majority or rare few? The countries I can think of with many 10-12yo kids with thoughts of serving the nation are China and North Korea. Why Singaporeans are more practical? Maybe because our ministers who really 为国为民 are the most highly paid the world.
Jumping in here - I think 10-12 yo kids can have altruistic motives for studying and achieving. It doesn't mean that more immediate outcomes, like getting into a particular school, are not motivating. I think we do a disservice to children to think that they are not able to have bigger goals than just what affects them directly. But if they are taught to think more broadly and for others, they will be less disturbed by not achieving a specific goal.
I guess a lot depends on the parents - if a child has been exposed to more than just his own desires, and shown how he can use his own desires and interests for the good of society, they can be motivated by a combination of these factors. If parents use lifestyle and material success for the individual as the main aim, I suppose that's what kids will imbibe. Children will learn what their parents to model and teach, even if it is goes against the general thinking of that school, that social circle or even society at large.
\"Study hard\" means so many different things to different people - what \"hard\" to me is probably quite relaxed to some others, and vice versa.
On paper, it looks nice that children have some aspirations, some ideas on what they want to do. Sometime back, I shared that my DD2 wanted to be a NTUC cashier in order to have more free time to do her own things. Many parents responded by saying that I need to teach her to be practical about things!! -
Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=\"2092245\" time=\"1671160001\" user_id=\"195250:[quote=\"Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=2092245 time=1671160001 user_id=195250]
Regarding grassroot leaders, I was one for few years. On the 1st day I went down to register myself as a volunteer, the staff asked me, “What is your motive?” I was taken aback. Then the staff continued, “everyone joins grassroots has a motive. Is it for P1 Registration or you need 2 car park lots?”
I and my DH have never pushed DS to study hard and force him to tuition. DS was interested in repairing electrical items when he was small and therefore he is now an Electrical Engineer.
How could you just jump to the conclusion that a 10 or 12 years old could not understand the important of benefit and serve his/her own country? If their parents are grassroots leaders and always doing volunteer work during weekend, then their kids may have the aspiration of serving the country.[/quote]
Altruism is real and ideal but it would be hard to depend solely on it as a motivation factor -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2092258\" time=\"1671167064\" user_id=\"17023:
Besides these two common motives,
Regarding grassroot leaders, I was one for few years. On the 1st day I went down to register myself as a volunteer, the staff asked me, “What is your motive?” I was taken aback. Then the staff continued, “everyone joins grassroots has a motive. Is it for P1 Registration or you need 2 car park lots?”
Altruism is real and ideal but it would be hard to depend solely on it as a motivation factor
(P1 registration + extra car park lot),
there are some other motives, too. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2092258\" time=\"1671167064\" user_id=\"17023:
我们一起从窗户往外看，为什么您看到的是地上的泥土, 我看到的却是天上的星星. :scratchhead:
Regarding grassroot leaders, I was one for few years. On the 1st day I went down to register myself as a volunteer, the staff asked me, “What is your motive?” I was taken aback. Then the staff continued, “everyone joins grassroots has a motive. Is it for P1 Registration or you need 2 car park lots?”
Altruism is real and ideal but it would be hard to depend solely on it as a motivation factor -
Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=\"2092261\" time=\"1671168710\" user_id=\"195250:[quote=\"Liew Nga Wing\" post_id=2092261 time=1671168710 user_id=195250]
That’s diversity and having these different perspectives are valuable. We don’t wish to be in an echo chamber
我们一起从窗户往外看，为什么您看到的是地上的泥土, 我看到的却是天上的星星. :scratchhead:[/quote]
Maybe, one day after my kids have graduated, and I become a Kiasu Grandparent, I may ask parents who are still inside the rat race, to look beyond the soil to see stars…. -
Sometimes we may just miss out what the children think. You think I think…all are adults’ thinking?
Different people got different lifestyle preference. Some just want to be ping ping dan dan but that to some people may be too boring? We talk, listen…digest and see what best to change or adopt to our ownways of doing things… but don’t need other people to follow mah…what we think & do are suited most to ourselves but we got to give allowance to other people, it may not 100% suitable but let them adjust to their own. Yup I think that is diversity ba…not everyone the same and that makes us all a unique person.
Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.
Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.
With your input, this post could be even better 💗
Register Login
Online Users
Recent Topics
Statistics