How do you get a 4 year old to do homework?

[jingle_ding]

okay, this can be really headache sometimes. I faced it for my child as well. Tell her to do her homework, it will never get into her head. faint And give excuses this and that. Sometimes reward may help. Sometimes scolding help. Lol.

[dimsum]

My DS (4yo) hates to do repetivite writings too. Since he’s not schooling now, it’s not of an issue. But I have been wondering, how will he learn how to write the chinese characters if he doesn’t do repetitive writings? Able to read and recognise the characters doesn’t mean he can write.

[Twins]

Aaronmom:

Hello all,

My 4 year old does not have alot of homework but once a week teacher will send home a few pages of writing to do at home. I cannot for the life of me get him to do it. He hates writing letters or numbers repeatedly. I don't want to start screaming and timing him out for not doing homework at 4!!!!!!! Any insights anyone???? HELP.

Sandra

My first reaction when I first read your post is \"I'm Horrified!\" A few pages of homework - gosh! Don't you sympathise with your child?
Do you really want to put him through this? Can it not wait for another year to have this laborious/mundane/boring way of learning introduced, where he's probably of a more appropriate age to understand why this may be necessary?

And yes, I will \"throw away the homework \" and question the teacher/principal's intent in the quantity of work for a mere 4 year old!!!

Perhaps this homework, if really needs to be done, can be classroom work instead. The \"peer pressure\" may well make a difference for your son to get the writing done.

[Aaronmom]

I talked to his teacher and she made me feel worse. She said that Aaron and 3 other children have this "problem". So this is a class of like 20 children and only a few have this problem so I get this is abnormal behavior? The other children would do their work happily?? And then she said that usually its because the parents are lax at home. LAX??? Every time I ask him to do homework, I am prepared to have a war started, crying screaming… I really can’t do it anymore!! I feel he is starting to act out. And this teacher also told me that when I talk to my son I need to make sure he looks me in the eye… that is just killing him. I mean if someone is disciplining you, can you comfortably look them in the eye?? He hates that and he is really very upset. My son is usually very happy go lucky but this two things "make him LOOK into your eyes" and "homework" has made our relationship HORRIBLE. I have never felt like this about my child. On the other hand, he loves this teacher but I HATE HER!!!

[mrswongtuition]

Aaronmummy, where do you stay? Maybe getting someone else to handle the homework part would be better.

[gerberadaisy]

Yes, I agree with mrswongtuition. Even though it is always said that parents are the kid’s best teachers, but sometimes, if teaching our own kids is giving both parties so much stress, it could be more effective if we engage someone else to do the teaching. I know of many parents who would rather give tuition to other kids and then engage a tuition teacher to teach their own kids, and they find this arrangement very effective.

[hquek]

hi aaronmum,


My kids do have a couple of pages each week to do. For the younger one (3 going 4), I will have to sit by him and work with him. He’s not very patient type and will start complaining hand pain what pain. I take it as something we have to go through.

In a sense I’m lucky in that he has an older brother he sees doing homework, so he knows it’s a part of life; and he doesn’t throw major tantrums. When he does complain of tiredness, I’ll just stop for the day and move on to do other things. If there are a lot, I may only give him a bit for today and save others for later.

But I’ll try to have the work completed early, so there won’t be last minute rush.

[tamarind]

Aaronmom:

I talked to his teacher and she made me feel worse. She said that Aaron and 3 other children have this \"problem\". So this is a class of like 20 children and only a few have this problem so I get this is abnormal behavior? The other children would do their work happily?? And then she said that usually its because the parents are lax at home. LAX???? Every time I ask him to do homework, I am prepared to have a war started, crying screaming..... I really can't do it anymore!! I feel he is starting to act out. And this teacher also told me that when I talk to my son I need to make sure he looks me in the eye.... that is just killing him. I mean if someone is disciplining you, can you comfortably look them in the eye?? He hates that and he is really very upset. My son is usually very happy go lucky but this two things \"make him LOOK into your eyes\" and \"homework\" has made our relationship HORRIBLE. I have never felt like this about my child. On the other hand, he loves this teacher but I HATE HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That means other parents scream even louder, and use the cane to beat their 4 year old into doing homework

Don't worry. I did not do all that when my boy was 4 years old. In fact, I did not ask him to do any homework or assessment books at that age. He spent almost all his time playing before K2, I only taught him to read for a short time everyday.

I only start to assign homework this year, he is now 6 years old. Now he has no problem finishing his homework, and he even does more pages of writing whenever he feels like it. He is already well prepared for P1 since the beginning of this year.

You don't have to the same thing like other parents do.

Remember that the most important thing is to develop a love for learning. You don't want to continue screaming at your child for the next 20 years (until he graduates from university).

As for looking into his eyes, I do think that it is important. However, I don't scream at my boy and make him look into my eyes at the same time. I hold his face, ask him to look into my eyes, and talk to him in a very cool and calm tone, repeating 5 times if necessary. Otherwise he will not remember anything that I said.

[tamarind]

dimsum:

My DS (4yo) hates to do repetivite writings too. Since he's not schooling now, it's not of an issue. But I have been wondering, how will he learn how to write the chinese characters if he doesn't do repetitive writings? Able to read and recognise the characters doesn't mean he can write.

dimsum,
It is definitely not too late to start writing at 6 years old.

For Chinese characters, remember that most words are made up of 偏旁, 部首 and the simple characters as the building blocks. Kids can start by practicing to write these simple characters. When learning to write more complex words, tell them to join the building blocks to make a word.

Many parents make the mistake of making their kids write as many Chinese words as possible by remembering the strokes. The fact is that a child may not even remember the word after practicing for many times. What's worst is that this may make the child dislike learning Chinese.

It is more important to teach a child to recognize the words, and to read as many story books as possible. Kids have the ability to take a \"photograph\" of each word and store it in their memory. When they need to write the word, they just pull up the \"file\" in the brain and view it like a powerpoint slide In fact, that is how I remember all those Chinese words.

One day my boy surprised me by showing me that he can write the word 我. I have never let him practice writing it before. I think he has the photograph of the word saved in his memory because he read it many times before

[oscarsem]

why not start with writing by doing some drawings to form animals? Make it interesting.


But i do know some schools do emphasis writing for 4 year old child. Is really a torture to them