How do you get a 4 year old to do homework?

[Sun_2010]

Aaronmom:

Thank you all again for your very comforting advice. To \"Twins\" mom, do you know that the so call homework the teacher gave him is EXACTLY what they are gona do in class!!!!!!! That's what so puzzling to me?! So I have to chase him around and cause world war 3 with him to do a few pages of repetitive writings that he is gona AGAIN do it the following days in classroom! She said they need REPETITIVE practice. Anyways, the last straw for me was when I drop my son in class one morning and heard her say to the children (she is really saying to me) \"Children, did you do your homework? If not, there is no recess time.\" You see, I obviously hasn't been handing in homework. At that point, i decided to change school. I don't know if montessori is popular in singapore but i found one that i quite like and I will transfer him this coming monday. I am so glad they have a little swimming pool too so i will tell him i want him to go to the swimming school. I can only pray that he likes the new school otherwise \"sway sway\" have to go back to this one coz he LOVES his teacher and class. sigh................ Am slightly worried about academics and him not able to adapt when he goes Primary one to the real world since montessori method is very \"go with the child's flow\". However, bottomline is I want a happy, confident and interested in learning child rather than he knows how to spell, read and write stupid letters by 5 years old.

My opinion is this is one decision that you will not regret.
Montessori does really teach some life skills along with academics and lets them grow without being made to feel they r not good enough as others.

Yes , we need kids who are happy and confidant , next 15-20 years they are going to learn, let them enjoy the process...

[corneyAmber]

Hi Aaronmom,


My DS is 6 and DD is 4, both with very different character. DS doesn’t mind a little pushing in getting homework done, and quite like doing homework. But DS will never let you push her to do anything. If she doesn’t like something, no form of motivation works.

Like your son, my DD started out hating to write a full page of letters, compared to DS who could write them at 2 yrs old. I used to feel angry over DD’s ‘attitude’, and eventually learned that THEY ARE JUST DIFFERENT. After a few failed attempts, I chucked those workbooks aside.

One day, we came across a set of Kumon letter cards at Popular, one that you can use as flashcards and for writing with a white-board marker. I asked if she would like to try practicing on those and she agreed. That was the starting point of letter-writing for her. Faced with only ONE letter to tackle at a time, she didn’t see how much she’s actually writing. She eventually overcame her resistance and is now able to cope with her homework of letter-writing. METHOD OF LEARNING MATTERS.

I used to bring the set of cards with me to occupy her boredom when we were traveling, and during those long banquets. Change of learning environment matters.

I also tried not to be too fussy over her strokes and allowed her time to make mistakes. She has improved over time - although still refusing to write them the conventional way sometimes.

[cheehoe]

Aaronmom:

Hello all,

My 4 year old does not have alot of homework but once a week teacher will send home a few pages of writing to do at home. I cannot for the life of me get him to do it. He hates writing letters or numbers repeatedly. I don't want to start screaming and timing him out for not doing homework at 4!!!!!!! Any insights anyone???? HELP.

Sandra

My wife and I have no problem getting my kids to do their homework. We sit with them (at least one of us) and do our work while they are doing theirs. We also give attention to them when they ask question or praise them if they write the letters properly. We do not penalise them for errors but correct them on the spot. We also give incentives such as going to play room after they finish their homework.

You may test out some of the methods we used.

[jedamum]

jedamum:

his teachers had feedback that his colouring is horrendous; i have not done anything for this yet cos how to make him colour if he does not like to? de ja vu, cos ds1 did not like colouring when he was a toddler and he turn out fine too, save for some very untidy handwriting. :roll:

Quick update...
my ds2 now can colour beautifully when he is in the mood! i found this very affordable 'sticker-colouring' book at Popular (managed to get 2 out of the 4 books in the same series; but since on, couldn't find the rest in the other Popular bookshops. :(); i used 'twisty' crayons for his colourings and sometimes writing assignment; he tried to write/colour as much so that he gets to twist the 'worn out' crayon tip to lengthen it
i am pressing on for doing daily colouring and writing (i bought the 'assessment books' that is fully coloured and a variety of others so that ds2 gets to choose what he wants to do) cos i blame myself for ds1's ugly handwriting (you see, i choose knowledge acquiring over practicing of motorskills when he was a preschooler; should have balanced out both! ). :stupid:

[art_n_i]

jedamum:

jedamum:

his teachers had feedback that his colouring is horrendous; i have not done anything for this yet cos how to make him colour if he does not like to? de ja vu, cos ds1 did not like colouring when he was a toddler and he turn out fine too, save for some very untidy handwriting. :roll:

Quick update...
my ds2 now can colour beautifully when he is in the mood! i found this very affordable 'sticker-colouring' book at Popular (managed to get 2 out of the 4 books in the same series; but since on, couldn't find the rest in the other Popular bookshops. :(); i used 'twisty' crayons for his colourings and sometimes writing assignment; he tried to write/colour as much so that he gets to twist the 'worn out' crayon tip to lengthen it
i am pressing on for doing daily colouring and writing (i bought the 'assessment books' that is fully coloured and a variety of others so that ds2 gets to choose what he wants to do) cos i blame myself for ds1's ugly handwriting (you see, i choose knowledge acquiring over practicing of motorskills when he was a preschooler; should have balanced out both! ). :stupid:

Mummy, you are right! Do more art and the issue will slowly diminish and disappear. My own child has never been trained to write religiously but she can just write because of her art training. I am running an art school because I am pledging what I believe and hope to share the joy of bringing up children with more parents.

[cherrygal]

My son’s childcare and kindergarten do not make them do homework at all. So far, we only had to help him study for his tingxie and spelling. That’s all. My niece’s childcare gives them a lot of homework and I heard some parents like that. Well, I don’t like having to coach my son after work so I prefer my son’s school.


His Chinese enrichment class has homework sometimes and he does it immediately after returning home. Occasionally, I will get him to do a few pages in his assessment books and he usually does them very quickly and willingly. He’s quite competitive at school so he loves doing his work quickly. At home, we build up his competitive streak by telling him how Dh and I loved doing assessment books last time (it’s true!).

We made a deal with him that when he gets to P1, he would need to complete all his homework before we can spend quality time together like baking, visiting interesting places etc. So the longer he takes, the less quality time we have. It’s his loss and this makes him responsible for his own work.

I also told him I would only remind him to do his homework for the 1st 3 months of school. After that, he must remember to do his own homework. If he forgets, he has to be prepared for his teacher’s scolding. I think that will wake him up.

[Charmaine_chong]

I do find that writing is necessary but not a must for 4yo.


You may want to use highlighter, bring the child to beach, use stick to doodle on beach, use white-board, chalk, maze, arts n craft to improve his/her motor skills.

The following books share the importance of read aloud and read widely

和儿子一起成长》
http://read.dangdang.com/content_2188350?ref=read-2-D&book_id=12021

朗读手册
Beneficial of reading aloud
http://product.dangdang.com/product.aspx?product_id=20633120&ref=book-02-L

让孩子踏上阅读快车道/名师大课堂
This is how a teacher teaches a group of P1 of students to read and strenghten their memory and love for reading
http://product.dangdang.com/product.aspx?product_id=20644925

[Esef]

Hello, I came across this group when I was searching for info of how to handle my soon to be 5 yr old son. He didn't like doing his writing homework before except coloring (which usually easy when I encouraged him and he will get rewards for his completed work) but not as much as these few days in his new 5+ class in Penang. Also, we just returned home after 3 months in Europe visiting my in-laws.


Anyway, he started to show his dislikes when I asked him to do extra written work which I brought along in this trip. After much persuasions and new things for him...He did it and managed to complete 3-5 sheets in one shot and even pointed out my mistake in Mandarin worksheet. :oops:

Then he wanted to go back to his old class ..sigh... He's former teacher managed to solve his problem where she traced lightly the sentences on the workbook and he completed 3 pages in less than 30 minutes. Even though I'm happy but for how long he's going to do that??? In reality, the old school technique still existed...

Another thing was... he's deeply into iPad and anything that's about coloring, etc ..yep... We download several Mandarin, English and French programs along with some skill games for him which he took up very well and responded beyond our expectation. Of course, all the graphics and rewards after he completed the tasks like drawing/tracing ABC's really encouraged him). I know not all countries and schools would give iPads to their students to do school works and study but definitely such technologies like e-books et all is the future! Right now, I have fear and sadness that my son would hate the school...

I'm going to try the Kumon method which I also saw at Popular over here. I think my son dislike repetitive work like some of you stated.

I hope to read more tried and tested methods you parents had out there.

Thanks.
Esef

[sogladwor]

Since my girl was 3.5 years old, I gave her a daily piece of “homework”, around 5mins, which she had to do when I was at work. It started with easy ones like tracing straight lines and as she progressed, tracing letters, tracing words and gradually by K2, she could do one hour of assigned work without adult supervision per day. My helper was not allowed to sit beside her. I told my helper to do her housework so my girl will not develop bad habits of always needing an adult to sit beside and supervise when she goes to P1. By the time she progressed to primary school, I never had to force her to sit down to do homework. An auntie advised starting this routine and I feel it really works. It already is a habit for her to automatically do school work when back from school. I think training from a young age is very important then will have less headache when they are in primary school. I do agree parents are the best teachers. If your child is bored, the work given may be boring and not developmental so time to switch up. Just ensure it is a gradual process.

[bridgette78]

Thanks for the tips!